This is very well written and presented very nicely. The images you have chosen fit nicely !I think your chapter could benefit from a few more links to key terms e.g. dissolution, consciousness, mindfulness. I think this would help the reader get more info and further background on these terms.
Hey @Danikollas:, I was just checking out your references, and they look great, however, there are some minor errors in the formatting, click 'here' to check out APA 7th edition referencing. Also here is one of your references adjusted (Epstein, M. (1988). The deconstruction of the self: Ego and “egolessness” in Buddhist insight meditation. The Journal of Transpersonal Psychology, 20(1), 61–69. Retrieved from https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=b9fa967838934c041dffc5ad71f169fbcc70ea82)
Hey, I saw that you still have your key points, learning features, and figures, as headings. I am not sure if this needs to be removed for the topic development or not, maybe worth checking with James. If you remove them and still want to reference back to them, you can click here — Preceding unsigned comment added by [[User:{{{1}}}|{{{1}}}]] ([[User talk:{{{1}}}#top|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/{{{1}}}|contribs]])
Latest comment: 2 months ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The topic development submission has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is below, plus see the general feedback page. Please also check the page history for changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Marks are available via UCLearn. Marks are based on the latest version before the due date.
Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.
Latest comment: 1 month ago3 comments2 people in discussion
Thanks for your comment on the UC discussion board! I've read through your chapter and found it super interesting! I was wondering if you might find it useful to incorporate in some research on the impact of a near death experience and its effect on the dissolution of the ego - I hope you find this article helpful file:///Users/nicolewilliams/Downloads/brainsci-11-00929.pdf U3235875 (discuss • contribs) 00:34, 26 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
Thank you!! I originally included NDE's but I was way over my word count and there was limited research on it so decided to cut it.
Great work on your chapter so far, I found it very interesting to read. Your opening case study is very engaging but perhaps you could add an internal link to psilocybin in case readers are unsure of what this means. I find it helpful to add these in "edit source" rather than the "edit" mode. Here's a helpful page if you need:https://meta.wikimedia.org/wiki/Help:Interwiki_linking_on_Wikimedia_wikis
I wanted to offer some feedback surrounding your 5th focus question "What are the ethical consideration and potential risks associated with facilitating ego death"
While the risks were pretty clearly outlined in the criticisms section, I would love to see some discussion surrounding further ethical considerations of the treatment.
If your interested I found a source talking about informed consent and how it should be implemented, along with concerns about how it would impact the treatment itself.
Latest comment: 1 month ago1 comment1 person in discussion
This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.
Overall, this is an excellent chapter. It successfully uses psychological theory and research to address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
Reasonably good use of academic, peer-reviewed citations to support claims
Use of academic, peer-reviewed citations is lacking in some places (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits
Overall, the quality of written expression is very good
Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes
Layout
The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections
I moved the criticisms section into the psychedelics section
Grammar, spelling, and proofreading are excellent
Abbreviations
Spell out abbreviations on their first use, to explain them to the reader
Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159)
Figures
Figures are reasonably well captioned
Refer to each Figure using APA style (e.g., check and correct capitalisation)
Latest comment: 15 days ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.
The chapter title and sub-title (or an abbreviation to fit within the 100 character limit) are used in the name of the presentation — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation
The chapter title is used, but the sub-title (or a shortened version of it) is not used, as the name of the presentation. The sub-title (or an abbreviation of the sub-title that fits within the 100 character limit) would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
An excellent written description of the presentation is provided
Excellent use of time codes
An inactive hyperlink to the book chapter is provided (maybe because the YouTube user account does not yet have access to advanced features)