Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2023/Indigenous Australian engagement in mental health services

Initial suggestions

@CaitlinFisher01: Thanks for tackling this topic. Some initial suggestions:

• Check out other related chapters and see how you can build on, link to, and integrate with that work:
  • Category:Motivation and emotion/Book/Indigenous/Australian
  • Category:Motivation and emotion/Book/Mental health
• What psychological theories can help to understand? What is the main research in this area?

Let me know if I can do anything else as you go along. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:53, 7 August 2023 (UTC)

Resource Suggestion

Hey @CaitlinFisher01: such an important topic, I can't wait to see what you write! The Western Australian Centre for Rural Health have some pretty amazing free courses on developing cultural competence as healthcare practitioners working with First Nations Peoples. I recommend checking out the cultural orientation course for a great example of what all health services in Australia should be implementing to increase engagement! --SashaBrooksby (discuss • contribs) 07:52, 24 August 2023 (UTC)

Thanks Sasha! What a great resource :) CaitlinFisher01 (discuss • contribs) 07:54, 24 August 2023 (UTC)

Formatting suggestion

Hi Caitlin, this is a really important topic for everyone living in Australia to understand, especially in the current climate where there are so many barriers and stimga in place. One small suggestion, i really like your Figure 1 as it is a great visual altough some of the smaller text is quite hard to read. Maybe try increasing the size of the image a little to make it easier for the viewer to see.

Fantastic work! U3216125 (discuss • contribs) 04:03, 8 October 2023 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example: Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development -- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:33, 25 September 2023 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development submission has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history for editing changes made whilst reviewing this chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date.

Title The title is correctly worded and formatted The sub-title is correctly worded and formatted Headings See earlier comment about Heading casing Promising 3-level heading structure – could benefit from further development by simplifying and focusing the structure Avoid having sections with only 1 sub-heading – use 0 or 2+ sub-headings Statistics heading not needed; integrate statistics and research findings throughout Consider adopting closer alignment between the sub-title, focus questions, and top-level headings Overview Issue described Add a scenario in a feature box (with an image) at the start to help catch reader interest Simplify/abbreviate - move detail into subsequent sections Excellent focus questions Key points Promising development of key points for each section, with relevant citations Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise general concepts and provide internal wiki links to relevant book chapters and/or Wikipedia pages for further information. Then focus most of the content of this on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. Strive for an integrated balance of theory and research Conclusion (the most important section): Underway What might the take-home, practical messages be? (What are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title and/or focus questions?) Write the chapter using 3rd person perspective, although a case study or feature box could use 1st or 2nd person perspective Figure Excellent - A relevant figure is presented, captioned, and cited Consider citing source of data in caption Learning feature Excellent use of in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters Consider including more examples/case studies, quiz question(s), table(s) etc. References Very good For APA referencing style, check and correct: make doi hyperlinks active (i.e., clickable) Resources See also Good Include source in brackets after link Also link to relevant Wikipedia pages External links Move academic sources into References and cite User page Good Brief description about self provided – consider expanding Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks. Link provided to book chapter Social contribution Excellent – at least three different types of contributions with direct link(s) to evidence Great to see you on X (formally known as Twitter)!

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:33, 25 September 2023 (UTC)

Book chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a very good chapter. It makes very good use of psychological theory and research to address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. Well over the maximum word count. The content beyond 4,000 words has been ignored for marking purposes. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits Overview Well developed Consider providing a case study or scenario with an image in a feature box to help engage reader interest Clearly explains the problem or phenomenon Clear focus questions Theory An excellent range of relevant theories are selected, described, and explained Overly focused on definitions and general theoretical background; instead summarise, link to related resources, and move to the more substantive aspects of theory Builds somewhat on previous, related chapters Insightful depth is provided about relevant theory(ies) Key citations are well used Some statements lack of sufficient use of academic, peer-reviewed citations (e.g., see the tags) Excellent use of examples to illustrate theoretical concepts Research Very good/ review of relevant research More detail about key studies would be ideal Very good critical thinking about relevant research is evident Critical thinking about research can be evidenced by: describing the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) in important studies discussing the direction of relationships considering the strength of relationships acknowledging limitations pointing out critiques/counterarguments suggesting specific directions for future research Integration Excellent integration between theory and research Conclusion Reasonably good summary and conclusion Approx. half of the Conclusion was counted for marking purposes Insufficient as a cohesive summary of the best available psychological theory and research about the topic Remind the reader about the importance of the problem or phenomenon of interest Key points are well summarised Summarise key points Clear take-home message(s) Address the focus questions Add practical, take-home message(s) Style Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is excellent, other than being over the word count Provide less (condensed) up-front background theory Some paragraphs are overly long. Communicate one key idea per paragraph in three to five sentences. The chapter could be improved by developing some of the bullet points into full paragraph format Layout There are a lot of headings; consider how to synthesise. Remove sub-headings from Conclusion (done) Remove colons from the end of headings Include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections (see tags) Remove unnecessary capitalisation APA style Use sentence casing for the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159) Write numbers under 10 using words (e.g., five). Express numbers 10 and over using numerals (e.g., 10). Figures Figures are well captioned Each Figure is referred to at least once within the main text Citations are not in full APA style (7th ed.). For example: A full stop is needed after "et al" (i.e., "et al.") because it is an abbreviation of et alii Use ampersand (&) inside parentheses and "and" outside parentheses References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of capitalisation[1] Learning features Good use of learning features Very good use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text even more interactive. See example. Very good/Good/Basic/One/No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Basic use of image(s) No use of table(s) Basic/No use of feature box(es) Good use of quiz(zes) and/or reflection question(s) Basic use of case studies or examples Basicuse of interwiki links in the "See also" section Use sentence casing Include sources in parentheses Basic use of external links in the "External links" section Remove bold Use bullet points per Tutorial 02 Rename links per Tutorial 02 Include sources in parentheses Social contribution ~5 logged, useful, mostly very minor social contributions with direct links to evidence Use a numbered list per Tutorial 02

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:34, 1 November 2023 (UTC)

Multimedia presentation feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a very good to excellent presentation Overview An opening slide with the title and sub-title is displayed — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation Also narrate the title and sub-title — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. This presentation has a basic introduction to engage audience interest A context for the presentation is established Perhaps some hard facts that point out the problem might be useful Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages. This will help to focus and discipline the presentation. Content Comments about the book chapter may also apply to this section The presentation addresses the topic An appropriate amount of content is presented — not too much or too little The presentation makes very good use of relevant psychological theory The presentation makes little to no use of relevant psychological research; ideally, make more explicit use of research Include citations to support claims The presentation makes basic use of one or more examples or case studies or practical advice The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies The presentation provides easy to understand information Conclusion A Conclusion slide is presented with clear take-home message(s) Audio The audio is easy to follow and interesting to listen to The presentation makes effective use of narrated audio Audio communication is well paced Excellent pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point. Excellent intonation enhances listener interest and engagement The narration is well practiced and/or performed Audio recording quality was excellent Audio is very slightly cut off at the start The narrated content is well matched to the target topic (see content) Video Overall, visual display quality is good The presentation makes reasonably good/basic use of text and image based slides More details about the key elements of the models could be useful The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read Consider using a sans-serif typeface to make the text easier to read The amount of text presented per slide makes it easy to read and listen at the same time The visual communication is supplemented in a basic way by images and/or diagrams The presentation is well produced using simple tools The visual content is well matched to the target topic (see content) but lacked synthesis of the best psychological research about this topic Meta-data The chapter sub-title but not the chapter title is used in the name of the presentation. The title would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding. Excellent use of time codes Links to and from the book chapter are provided An inactive hyperlink to the book chapter is provided because the YouTube user account does not yet have access to advanced features Licensing Image sources are communicated The NIAA image is probably not licensed for re-use A copyright license for the presentation is provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:14, 11 November 2023 (UTC)