Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2023/Egosystem and ecosystem motivation

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Initial suggestions[edit source]

@U3216125: Thanks for tackling this topic. Some initial suggestions:

Let me know if I can do anything else as you go along. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:09, 13 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Minor edit to subheading[edit source]

@U3216125 This is looking great! I have only made a minor edit on one of your subheadings, so it matched the others size wise :). --CaitlinFisher01 (discusscontribs) 07:55, 8 October 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example:

Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory

Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 07:03, 29 September 2023 (UTC)[reply]


The topic development submission has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history for editing changes made whilst reviewing this chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date.

Title[edit source]

  1. The title is correctly worded and formatted
  2. The sub-title is correctly worded and formatted
  3. Remove user name (at bottom) – authorship is as per the list of topics and the page's editing history

Headings[edit source]

  1. See earlier comment about Heading casing
  2. Promising 2-level heading structure – could benefit from further development by expanding the structure
  3. Question marks missing from headings
  4. Remove knowledge checkpoint headings - just embed the quiz (e.g., can be in a feature box) in the most relevant section
  5. "What are the theoretical underpinnings of motivation?" is too broad - focus on theory more directly related to egosystem/ecosystem motivation
  6. Promising alignment between the sub-title, focus questions, and top-level headings

Overview[edit source]

  1. Consider replacing before reading this chapter with a real or hypothetical scenario. Add an image to help attract reader interest.
  2. A brief, evocative description of the problem/topic is provided
  3. Focus questions are reasonably aligned with sub-title and top-level headings
  4. Improve focus questions by referring to eco/ego system motivation
  5. The last focus question is too general

Key points[edit source]

  1. Promising development of key points for each section, with relevant citations
  2. For sections which include sub-sections include key points for an overview paragraph prior to branching into the sub-headings
  3. Strive for an integrated balance of theory and research, with practical examples
  4. Direct quotes need page numbers (APA style) – even better, write in your own words
  5. Check and correct APA citation style for three of more authors
  6. Conclusion (the most important section):
    1. Underway
    2. What might the take-home, practical messages be? (What are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title and/or focus questions?)

]

Figure[edit source]

  1. A figure is presented and cited
  2. The figure caption(s) provide(s) a clear, appropriately detailed description that is meaningfully connected with the main text
  3. Consider increasing image size from to make it easier to view

Learning feature[edit source]

  1. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters
  2. Promising use of quiz question(s)
  3. Focus the quiz question(s) on the take-home messages for each focus questionon
  4. Consider including examples/case studies, table(s) etc.

References[edit source]

  1. Good
  2. For APA referencing style, check and correct:
    1. capitalisation
    2. italicisation

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also
    1. User interwiki link style (see Tutorial 02)
    2. Include source in brackets after link. Do not link what is in brackets.
  2. External links
    1. One of two links provided
    2. Use sentence casing
    3. Include source in brackets after link. Do not link what is in brackets.

User page[edit source]

  1. Note developed

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. None summarised on user page with direct link(s) to evidence – this was covered in Tutorial 03. Looking ahead to the book chapter submission, see how to earn marks for social contributions.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 07:03, 29 September 2023 (UTC)[reply]


Social Contribution[edit source]

Hey, I think you've displayed your page really well. I would consider adding a table to compare the different attachment styles you mentioned. I look forward to your finished work :) --U3224582 (discusscontribs) 05:24, 8 October 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, thank you for the time you have spent working on this chapter, I think it was very well done. I have made some changes to your reference list. Referencing an article and a book can be slightly different; when you reference the book, you italicise the title instead of the publisher (don't worry, I find it strange too!)

Jingying Chen (discusscontribs) 10:15, 19 October 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Book chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter. It successfully uses psychological theory and research to address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
  2. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits

Overview[edit source]

  1. Reasonably good
  2. Engages reader interest by introducing a case study and/or scenario with an image in a feature box
  3. Make a stronger connection between the case study and ego/ecosystem motivation
  4. Explains the problem or phenomenon
  5. Basic focus questions
  6. The relevance of the last focus question is unclear

Theory[edit source]

  1. An excellent range of relevant theories are selected, described, and explained
  2. Build more strongly on other related chapters (e.g., by embedding links to other chapters)
  3. Insightful depth is provided about relevant theory(ies)
  4. Some use of tables and/or lists are to help clearly convey key theoretical information
  5. Key citations are well used
  6. Some statements lack sufficient use of academic, peer-reviewed citations (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
  7. Excellent of examples to illustrate theoretical concepts

Research[edit source]

  1. Very good review of relevant research
  2. More detail about key studies would be ideal
  3. Any systematic reviews or meta-analyses in this area? Greater emphasis on effect sizes could be helpful.
  4. Very good critical thinking about relevant research is evident
  5. Critical thinking about research could be further evidenced by:
    1. describing the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) in important studies
    2. discussing the direction of relationships
    3. considering the strength of relationships
    4. acknowledging limitations
    5. pointing out critiques/counterarguments
    6. suggesting specific directions for future research
  6. Some claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)

Integration[edit source]

  1. Excellent integration between theory and research

Conclusion[edit source]

  1. Reasonably good summary and conclusion
  2. Initial paragraph is a bit vague/general
  3. Remind the reader about the importance of the problem or phenomenon of interest
  4. Add practical, take-home message(s)

Style[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is very good
    2. Some paragraphs are overly long. Communicate one key idea per paragraph in three to five sentences.
    3. Some sentences are overly long. Strive for the simplest expression. Consider splitting longer sentences into two shorter sentences.
    4. Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes
    5. Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in parentheses at the end of the sentence.
  2. Layout
    1. Include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections (see [Provide more detail] tags)
    2. See earlier comments about heading casing
  3. Grammar
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags
  4. APA style
    1. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as
    2. Figures
      1. Figures are well captioned
      2. Each Figure is referred to at least once within the main text
    3. Tables
      1. Use APA style for captions. See example
      2. Each Table is referred to at least once within the main text
      3. Refer to each Table using APA style (e.g., do not use italics, check and correct capitalisation)
    4. Citations use correct APA style
    5. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation[2]
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation
      3. Separate page numbers using an en-dash (–) rather than a hyphen (-)
      4. Include hyperlinked dois
      5. "Retrieved from" is no longer used (APA style, 7th ed.)
      6. Add spaces between author initials
      7. Move non-peer-reviewed sources to the external links section

Learning features[edit source]

  1. Very good use of learning features
  2. Good use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text even more interactive. See example.
  3. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
  4. Very good use of image(s)
  5. Basic use of table(s)
  6. Good use of feature box(es)
  7. Good use of quiz(zes) and/or reflection question(s)
  8. Basic use of case studies or examples
  9. Very good use of interwiki links in the "See also" section
    1. Use sentence casing
  10. Good of external links in the "External links" section
    1. Remove bold formatting
    2. Use sentence casing

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~4 logged, useful, minor to moderate social contributions with direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:32, 1 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic presentation
  2. The presentation is under the maximum time limit, so there was room for further development of the ideas

Overview[edit source]

  1. An opening slide with the title and sub-title is displayed — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation
  2. Also narrate the title and sub-title — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  3. This presentation has a basic introduction to engage audience interest
  4. A basic context for the presentation is established
  5. Focus questions and/or an outline of topics are presented

Content[edit source]

  1. Comments about the book chapter may also apply to this section
  2. The presentation addresses the topic
  3. The presentation makes reasonably good use of relevant psychological theory
  4. The presentation makes insufficient use of relevant psychological research
  5. Ideally, make more explicit use of research
  6. Include citations to support claims
  7. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies

Conclusion[edit source]

  1. A Conclusion is presented with an insufficient take-home message(s)
  2. A Conclusion slide is presented with an odd summary
  3. Replace the quote on the conclusion slide (the quote doesn't seem to be about ego/ecosystem motivation?) with specific take-home messages

Audio[edit source]

  1. The presentation makes reasonably good use of narrated audio
  2. The presentation could be improved by slowing down
  3. The initial set of questions narrated on the first slide seem to be unnecessarily broad. Tailor the focus questions more specifically to the topic.
  4. "this motivation" convert to "[type of] motivation"
  5. Reasonably good intonation
  6. The narration is well practiced and/or performed
  7. Audio recording quality was good. Review microphone set-up to achieve higher recording quality. Probably an on-board microphone was used (e.g., keyboard and/or mouse clicks were audible). Consider using an external microphone.
  8. The narrated content is well matched to the target topic (see content) but lacked synthesis of the best psychological research about this topic

Video[edit source]

  1. Overall, visual display quality is basic
  2. The presentation makes basic use of text and image based slides
  3. There is a lot of "these", "this", "they" etc. without naming the target construct (e.g., slide 2). Communication can be strengthened by explicitly naming the "thing".
  4. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read
  5. The visual communication is supplemented in a basic way by images
  6. Also consider using diagrams
  7. The presentation is basically produced using simple tools
  8. The visual content is well matched to the target topic (see content) but lacked synthesis of the best psychological research about this topic

Meta-data[edit source]

  1. The chapter title and sub-title (or an abbreviation to fit within the 100 character limit) are used in the name of the presentation — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation
  2. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding.
  3. Links to and from the book chapter are provided
  4. An inactive hyperlink to the book chapter is provided because the YouTube user account does not yet have access to advanced features

to add the presentation to a playlist. More info.

Licensing[edit source]

  1. Image sources and their copyright status are communicated
  2. The license for the table is as per Wikiversity (Creative Commons)
  3. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:13, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]