Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Meditation and goal attainment

Heading casing

FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example: Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development -- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:05, 19 September 2021 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title Note that I've moved and renamed the chapter (to remove "visualisation") The title is correctly worded and formatted The sub-title is correctly worded and formatted User page Created - minimal, but sufficient Very brief description about self provided - consider expanding Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks. Link provided to book chapter Social contribution Summarised with indirect link(s) to evidence Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Headings See earlier comment about Heading casing Promising 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development by expanding the structure Rationalise proposed headings and refine the wording of the headings so that they are more descriptive Remove colons Use default heading formatting (e.g., avoid bold, italics, underline etc.) Key points Promising development of key points for some section, with some relevant citations. Other sections are empty. The main area for potential improvement is focus the content more directly on the topic (i.e., the relation between meditation and goal attainment) and abbreviate/remove more general content (e.g., about meditation). To this end, the most important section is likely to be "How meditation supports goal attainment". Overview - Consider adding: an evocative description of the problem an image an example or case study Write the chapter using 3rd person perspective, although a case study or feature box could use 1st or 2nd person perspective Use APA style for citations e.g., for citations with three or more authors (i.e., FirstAuthor et al., year) Direct quotes need page numbers (APA style) - even better, write in your own words For sections which include sub-sections include key points for an overview paragraph prior to branching into the sub-headings Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise general concepts and provide internal wiki links to other book chapters and/or Wikipedia pages for further information. Then focus most of the content of this chapter on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. Strive for an integrated balance of theory and research Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Consider including more examples/case studies Conclusion (the most important section): hasn't been developed what might the take-home, practical messages be? in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title and/or focus questions? Figure A figure is presented Caption should include Figure X. ... Cite each figure at least once in the main text References None Resources See also None External links Rename links so that they are more user friendly Include source in brackets after link Use bullet-points (per Tutorial 1)

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:05, 19 September 2021 (UTC)

Referencing

Hi, your chapter is coming along really well! It looks like you'll be on track for timely submission. I have noticed some minor errors in your referencing, namely journal names and volumes not being italicised and some references with incorrect casing. I have corrected some errors for you, although it may be worth revisiting as you finalise your chapter and potentially add more references. Here is a great link for some guidelines on APA 7th Edition referencing. I hope this helps! Charli --CharliU3203035 (discuss • contribs) 04:54, 15 October 2021 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. Overall, this chapter does a reasonably good job of applying psychological theory and research to a real-world problem. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient chapter. Overall, this is an insufficient chapter. I suspect that the recommended 5 topic development hours and 45 book chapter hours were not invested in preparing this chapter. Title adjusted to match the main book table of contents. This chapter makes insufficient use of primary, peer-reviewed sources as citations. Non-peer reviewed sources are over-used. Move non-peer reviewed links into the external links section. This chapter is well under/over the maximum word count. Addressing the topic development feedback could have helped to improve this chapter. There is other feedback about the topic development that has been ignored, so it is not repeated in these book chapter comments. For additional feedback, see the following comments and [ these copyedits]. Overview Reasonably good Overview.]]). Psychology began in 1979!? (explain) Consider explaining the problem or phenomenon in more detail. Clear focus question(s). Consider introducing a case study or example or using an image to help engage reader interest. Theory — Breadth Relevant theory is reasonably well explained. Ideally, this chapter could refer to (e.g., through embedded links), and more strongly build on, other meditation-related chapters (see Category:Motivation and emotion/Book/Meditation). The chapter doesn't wander off into discussion of irrelevant theory. Theory — Depth Reasonable depth is provided about the selected theory(ies). The Reeve (2018) textbook is overused as a citation - instead, utilise primary, peer-reviewed sources. Tables and/or lists are used effectively to help clearly convey key theoretical information. Some useful examples are provided to illustrate theoretical concepts. Research — Key findings Relevant research is cited and described. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. More detail about the results for key studies would be helpful. Research — Critical thinking Basic critical thinking about research is evident. Critical thinking about research could be further evidenced by: considering the strength of relationships suggesting specific directions for future research Some claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the tags). Integration Discussion of theory and research is well integrated. Conclusion Clear summary. Consider adding practical, take-home messages. Written expression — Style Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is promising in the way it is simple, direct, and interesting, but also consider room for improvement. Some sentences are overly long (e.g., the first sentence); consider splitting them into shorter, separate sentences. Avoid one sentence paragraphs (e.g., the first paragraph). A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences. Use permanent, rather than relative, time references. For example, instead of "20 years ago", refer to something like "at the beginning of the 21st century". In this way, the text will survive better into the future, without needing to be rewritten. Similarly, avoid overly current time references (e.g., In "the current unique pandemic climate") because this text will age very quickly. Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes. Reduce use of weasel words (e.g., "Put simply, ", "considered") which bulk out the text, but don't enhance meaning. Direct quotes should be embedded within sentences and paragraphs, rather than dumped holus-bolus. Even better, communicate the concept in your own words. Layout The heading text is excellent. See earlier comments about heading casing. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. Sub-headings have been removed from the Conclusion. Grammar The grammar for many sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Grammar-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages. Another option is to share draft work with peers and ask for their assistance. Use serial commas[2] - they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's an explanatory video (1 min). Check and correct use of that vs. who. Proofreading Remove unnecessary capitalisation (e.g., Psychology -> psychology). APA style Do not capitalise the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc.. Figures and tables Use APA style for Table captions. See example. Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics, check and correct capitalisation). Citations use correct APA style. References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of italicisation Page numbers should be separated by an en-dash (–) rather than a hyphen (-) Written expression — Learning features Overall, the use of learning features is good. No use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. See example. Good use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Basic use of image(s). Good use of table(s). Excellent use of feature box(es). Very good use of quiz(zes). Very good use of case studies or examples. Social contribution ~2 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence. The first link seems to go to someone else's contribution?

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 07:28, 5 November 2021 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a very good. Overview An opening slide with the sub-title (add a question mark) is presented and narrated - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. The title would also help. The importance of this topic is explained. Briefly explain why this topic is important. Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages. Content Comments about the book chapter also apply to this section. The presentation addresses the topic. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The presentation is well structured. The presentation makes good use of relevant psychological theory. The theory is quite general and not particularly specific to meditation. The presentation makes very good use of relevant psychological research. Citations for meditation effects on brain and body? Some use of examples or case studies. Conclusion A Conclusion slide is narrated. Also present take-home message dot points. The conclusions are not specific to goal attainment? Audio The audio is easy to follow and interesting to listen to. The presentation makes effective use of narrated audio. Audio communication is clear and well paced. Audio recording quality was excellent. Video Overall, visual display quality is very good. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. The amount of text presented per slide could be reduced to make it easier to read. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images. The presentation is well produced using simple tools. Hide the audio icon. Meta-data The chapter sub-title but not the chapter title is used in the name of the presentation - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding. Links to and from the book chapter are provided. Licensing Image sources are communicated in a general way. Also provide links to each image and the license details. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:30, 16 November 2021 (UTC)