Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Emotional abuse

From Wikiversity
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Comments[edit source]

Hey there, under your heading Psychological theory & emotional abuse perhaps you can list the two major theories rather than just "theory 1, theory 2". I don't think you should have a sub heading under conclusion, the conclusion should sum up the rest of your chapter. Make sure to add at least 3 references to get full marks for your topic development as well as an external link and a see more link. Looking forward to reading your chapter :) Sunbear25 (discusscontribs) 00:33, 1 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Super helpful thank you!! - u3169884

Hi! This is really interesting and I look forward to reading the finished product. I found these two youtube videos that could be interesting to put somewhere in as links, that just have signs of emotional abuse, and emotional manipulation.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=logQdS2egeQ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtjpY_lDn5U

Also another recommendation I have is because some of the topics you are touching on within your chapter are of a delicate nature or signs that people may not have recognised as abuse perhaps you could link to some external sources if people are requiring assistance, I have linked a DV website below :)

https://www.whiteribbon.org.au/find-help/domestic-violence-hotlines/

--Tahnee Smithers (discusscontribs) 16:55, 1 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Oh you're a gem! very helpful. Thank you!

Hi there, am enjoying your progress so far on what sounds like a very interesting and well thought out book chapter. I am excited to read more. u3176290

Hey again, make sure you include an overview in your book chapter. Consider using less examples an perhaps incorporate some of your own made up case studies instead? [[1]] Sunbear25 (discusscontribs) 01:46, 16 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Hi there! I love what you have done with the chapter, very interesting. Thought it might be interesting to look into the emotional abuse that ex-offenders face and how it differs from the general population. This link could be helpful: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5067087/ Hope this helps! U3178428 (discusscontribs) 3:51, 20 October 2019 (UTC)

Hey! I really enjoy the use of case studies in your chapter, it would be amazing if you added some more information to them. They offer great context to the information you're providing but more depth would really help to solidify the content! Good Luck! --U3162204 (discusscontribs) 05:44, 20 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:36, 29 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]


The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title[edit source]

  1. Incomplete
  2. Sub-title has been added; capitalisation corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents

User page[edit source]

  1. Created, but virtually blank

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Contributions on chapter page moved to user page
  2. Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Promising 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development.
  2. See earlier comment about Heading casing.
  3. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Remove or adapt generic template content.
  2. Basic development of key points for some sections, with relevant citations.
  3. Overview - Consider adding focus questions.
  4. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters.
  5. Consider introducing a case study in the Overview.
  6. Consider including more examples/case studies.

Image[edit source]

  1. An image (figure) is presented.
  2. Caption does not use APA style.
  3. Caption could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text.
  4. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. References should be cited.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html
    2. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also
    1. Rename links so that they are more user friendly
    2. Also link to relevant book chapters
  2. External links
    1. None

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:36, 29 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. The main area for improvement is in the quality of written expression, particularly grammar.
  2. Sub-title was incorrect; now fixed.
  3. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained.
  2. Excellent use of micro case studies.

Research[edit source]

  1. Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory.
  2. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Some sentences are overly long (e.g., 1st case study); consider splitting them into shorter, separate sentences.
    2. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned").
    3. Internationalise: Write for an international, not just a domestic audience. Australians make up only 0.32% of the world human population.
  2. Layout
    1. Use default heading styles; now fixed.
    2. See earlier comments about heading casing.
    3. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
    4. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Excellent use of interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive.
    2. No use of embedded links to related book chapters. Embedding interwiki links links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    3. Basic use of images.
    4. No use of tables.
    5. Excellent use of feature boxes.
    6. Excellent use of quizzes.
    7. Excellent use of case studies or examples.
  4. Grammar
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    2. Use serial commas[2] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists.
    3. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').
    4. Check and correct use of affect vs. effect.
  5. APA style
    1. Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numerals (e.g., 10).
    2. Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. A serial comma is needed before "&" or "and" for citations involving three or more authors.
    3. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. See new doi format.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~9 logged social contributions mostly within 24 hours before book chapters due, without direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:51, 11 November 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, problematic presentation.
  2. The presentation is over the maximum time limit - content beyond 3 mins is ignored for marking purposes (I stopped about 2/3 of the way through).

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Poorly selected content - too much and goes for too long. Zoom out and provide a higher-level presentation at a slower pace. It is best to do a small amount well than a large amount poorly. Focus in on one thing and one thing only - summarising in 3 mins the best available psychological theory and research about this question: "What is emotional abuse and what are its consequences?", with practical, take-home messages.
  2. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  3. Narrate the Title slide, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation.
  4. Lack of Conclusion within the max. time limit.

Communication[edit source]

  1. Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This presentation feels rushed. Slowing down will help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  2. Consider using greater intonation to enhance listener interest and engagement.
  3. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  4. The visual communication is supplemented by images.
  5. Use Australian spelling.
  6. Use alphabetical order for citations.
  7. There seem to be too many references.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Communicate the chapter title and sub-title in both the presentation title (currently untitled) and on the opening slide (needs to match the book chapter) this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Audio recording quality was good.
  3. Visual recording quality was good.
  4. Image sources and their copyright status are not provided - suspected copyright violation.
  5. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.
  6. A link to the book chapter is not provided.
  7. A link from the book chapter is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:46, 17 November 2019 (UTC)[reply]