Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Emotional abuse
What is emotional abuse and what are its consequences?
Overview[edit | edit source]
This book chapter will explore the foundations of emotional abuse, including the different forms it can take, the different relationships in can influence and the detrimental psychological repercussions that accompany such abuse. Additionally, two psychological theories are explored and how these theories relate to emotional abuse. There is a growing amount of research on this topic, childhood emotional abuse specifically. Furthermore, the different psychological disorders involved in psychological abuse will be explored as possible treatment methods. Research in this field would benefit from pursuing more data in adult emotional abuse and family emotional abuse.
What is emotional abuse?[edit | edit source]
Emotional abuse, which has also been referred to as psychological abuse (Follingstad, 2007), controlling abuse (Arguilar & Nightingale, 1994) and verbal abuse (Evans, 1992) can be defined as psychologically abusive behaviours that are directed at the victims emotional well-being and sense of self (Murphy & Hoover, 2001). Emotional abuse involves treating someone in an inferior way, which can involve sadistic behaviour (Follingstad & Rogers, 2014) overprotection, threat, terrorising, excessive punishment, denigration, rejection, isolation, scapegoating and/or manipulation (Rees, 2009). Emotional abuse can occur in many relationships, including parent-child relationships (Antypa & Van Der Does, 2010), romantic relationships (Murphy & Hoover, 1999), friendships (Sheikh, 2018) and in the sporting environment (Gervis & Dunn, 2004).
Types of emotional abuse[edit | edit source]
Psychological abuse can take many different forms, many of which have detrimental, long-lasting affects. Below are a list of some of the most common emotionally abusive behaviours.
Sadism[edit | edit source]
Sadism is one form of psychological abuse that refers to someone who derives pleasure from the pain and suffering of another individual (Foulkes, 2019). This behaviour often occurs in romantic relationships and can take place in the form of embarrassing others, physical harm and sexual manipulation (Foulkes, 2019). People who suffer from sadistic tendencies often suffer from other psychological issues and disturbances (Foulkes, 2019).
Sam has been lying to his partner Sophie, when Sophie finds out, Sam finds a way to manipulate the situations so that she feels like she forced him to lie, Sophie is distressed and upset by this and Sam enjoys seeing her distressed over the conflict he has caused (also an example of scapegoating).
Overprotection[edit | edit source]
Overprotection in child parent relationships is increasingly common and referred to as a behaviour that is out of contrast with the situation and individualsdepression and other psychological harm (Guillaume & Bali, 2017).development , this involves perceiving someone as more vulnerable then they actually are (Hullmann et al. 2010). Research has found that overprotection can be used as a method of emotional abuse that leads to
Lisa doesn’t like her fifteen-year-old son, Todd, going to the skate park because she is worried he will hurt himself. Todd resents his mother for this because all his friends get to go and he loves skating. Todd gets depressed because he can’t hang out with his friends.
Threat[edit | edit source]
There are two main forms of threat, physical and non-physical (Bettache & Chiu, 2018). Non-physical threat is the most common in emotional abuse and evidence has also proved it to be more detrimental and long lasting compared to physical abuse (Follingstad & Rogers, 2014). Threats can occur in many different forms, whether it’s a threat of physical violence, deception or a threat of removing something personal to the individual (Buss, 1992).
Sophie is finding her relationship with Sam increasingly toxic, she is wanting to break up with Sam, however, every time she tries to leave him Sam threatens to kill himself.
Punishment[edit | edit source]
Punishment is another form of emotional abuse that is described as a penalty that is inflicted for an offence that is a violation of rules, norms and/or expectations (Wang & Murnighan, 2017). Follingstad and Rogers (2014) found that punishment is one of the most common forms of emotional abuse such as refusing to speak to the other person (Follingstad & Rogers, 2014).
Lisa works with a man called James, they are the same level of employment but James thinks he knows a lot more than her. Lisa got an opportunity over James due to her preparation, James has now been handing her misleading information about the task and behaving in a hostile manner towards her.
Denigration[edit | edit source]
Denigration often referred to as ridicule is often used in emotional abuse as a way of putting the other person down and making them feel bad about themselves (Proyer, Meier, Platt & Ruch, 2013). Ridicule can be used to critique ones personal characteristics and influence the way a person feels about themselves (Sackett & Saunders, 1999). Research proposes that it is one of the worst forms of emotional abuse and is tied to depression and low self-esteem (Sackett & Saunders, 1999).
Sam knows that he doesn’t treat Lisa very well and that she deserves better, so he puts her down and insults her so that she feels too insecure to leave him.
Manipulation[edit | edit source]
Manipulation refers to one's capability to manipulate the emotions of others within a self-serving manner (Grieve & Mahar, 2010). Research has suggested that men are more likely than women to use emotional manipulation due to masculine gender role expectations (Bacon & Regan, 2015). Additionally, manipulation is most common in romantic relationships and leads to relationship breakdowns, insecurity and wellbeing implications (Gonzalez-Mendez, Rojas-Solis & Ramirez-Santana, 2017).
John wants Lisa to hang out with him and his friends, Lisa doesn’t really like his friends so she wants John to go on his own, John says ‘If you really loved me you would do this’.
Quiz[edit | edit source]
Why and who - emotional abuse[edit | edit source]
Emotionally abusive behaviours can occur without an individual even being aware that they are behaving in such a manner (Ross, 2007). It can be an unconscious behaviour that has developed over time due to it assisting an individual in obtaining what they want or a habit of acting in a way that is detrimental to others (Ross, 2007).
Sporting Relationships[edit | edit source]
Psychological abuse in sporting relationships is relatively common and coaches/trainers are often unaware of the mental repercussions that accompany it (Stirling, 2013). Research has suggested that this is a normative practice in the sports environment (Gervis & Dunn, 2004) and has long standing negative effects for the athlete (Jacobs, Smits & Knoppers, 2017). The emotional abuse that can occur in these instances includes ridicule, belittlement, humiliating remarks and refusing to assist or help the athlete (Stirling, 2013). Many coaches partake in this behaviour because they feel like it is at the benefit of the athlete’s performance and that they perform better and receive better results (Stirling & Kerr, 2012). When the athlete has better results it reflects better on the coach, working towards the coach's benefit, even if the long-term damage for the athlete is detrimental to their wellbeing (Stirling & Kerr, 2008).
Intimate relationships[edit | edit source]
Abuse, not only emotionally but physically, has frequently become more common over the yearssexual abuse which research has suggested leaves an individual highly vulnerable to posttraumatic stress disorder and other relevant psychological disorders (Avant, Swopes, Davis & Elhai, 2011). Often the individual in the relationship who is verbally aggressive has learnt this from relationships in their earlier life (Parkinson, 2017), which will be further discussed in the psychological theories section. Moreover, in these types of relationships, men are the predominant emotional abusers (Arias & Pape, 1999) and often men aren’t aware of the detrimental effect they are having over their partners or wives (Arias & Pape, 1999).(Parkinson, 2017). Within intimate relationships emotional abuse is strongly correlated with physical and
Parent-child relationships[edit | edit source]
There is a large body of research covering childhood emotional abuse and associated risk factors of such behaviour (Allen, 2011). Parental aggression and a lack of control on emotions appears to be a big contributing factor to emotional abuse taken out on children (Allen, 2011). It is common for parents to unknowingly emotionally abuse their child by not meeting their needs for attention and love (Riggs & Kaminski, 2009), especially for first time parents who are new to the needs of young children (Riggs & Kaminski, 2009). Additionally, when a child’s needs aren’t met in their younger years and they experience more conflict then attention, they are left more vulnerable to psychological difficulties and the potential to replicate their parents behaviour whether that is inattention or aggression (Riggs & Kaminski, 2009).
Brian’s dad was really hard on him growing up, told him he was useless, couldn’t do anything right and was never there for him emotionally. Brian’s dad also hit his mum a few times growing up. Now as a father, Brian isn’t very good at controlling his temper, he struggles with spurts of depression and often gets flashbacks from his childhood. Brian often takes out his frustrations on his son Samuel, who is ten,Samuel gets in trouble at school for yelling at his classmates, and Brian often yells at him for this and sends him to bed without dinner because of this.
Psychological Theories[edit | edit source]
Social learning theory[edit | edit source]
Social learning theory focuses on how we learn from others and our environment, it was brought to light by Albert Bandura in the late nineteen hundreds. Felson and Lane (2009) suggests that people learn through their experiences of what happens to them and witnessing what happens to others, this identifies that those who are victims of emotional abuse or witness such abuse are more likely to carry out the same behaviour. Additionally, social learning theory proposes that ‘definitions and behaviours of others with whom one interacts with’ has powerful affects upon anothers values and morals (Sellers, Cochran & Branch, 2003). Furthermore, those who are susceptible to emotional abuse once are often susceptible to it later in life due to a lower rate of self-esteem and higher vulnerability (Sellers, Cochran & Branch, 2003).
Attachment theory[edit | edit source]
The Theory of attachment came to be in the mid to late nineteen hundreds where John Bowlby theorised that the parent-child relationship is an important key foundation of a child’s ability to form attachments and explore the world (Riggs & Kaminski, 2008). When this relationship is jeopardised, which it so often is when a child is a victim of emotional abuse, it intercepts their development, endangering their ability to form relationships and potentially leading the individual to seek out insecure relationships and develop unstable connections throughout their later years (Riggs & Kaminski, 2008).
Sam is four years old,his mum works a lot and his dad is posted out in the army. Sam goes to daycare and then his grandma picks him up after school. Sam doesn't get to see his mum much, and when he does, she usually doesn't have time to sit down and play with him.
Sam is now 25, has never had a serious relationship, and always manages to freak out before things get serious. The closest he got to a serious relationship he scared her off by not letting her have any space or any time with her friends.
Psychological Repercussions[edit | edit source]
Psychological disorders in children[edit | edit source]
Psychological abuse can affect the development and wellbeing of the individual involved leading to numerous mental disorders. In such cases emotional abuse at a young age can trigger eating disorders such as bulimia, therefore, affecting ones physical and mental development (Groleau. Et al., 2012). Additionally, children who face emotional neglect growing up face an increased risk of developing anxiety and depression, in turn affecting their ability to build sound self-esteem, relationships and interfering with cognitive development (Harmelen, Jong, Glashouwer, Spinhoven, Penninx. &Elzinga. 2010). Additionally, child victims of emotional abuse are more likely to parktake in risky and deviant behaviour, such as drinking underage, skipping classes and compromising friendships and relationships (Ozdemir, 2018).
Psychological disorders in intimate relationships[edit | edit source]
Psychological disorders occurring from adult intimate relationships are a primary repercussion of such relationships. Mental disorders such as PTSD, anxiety, depression and severe distress are common among these sorts of relationships (Harper, Austin Cercone & Arias, 2005). These mental disorders can lead to daily life interference, inability to form proper attachments, sleep disruption and cognitive deficits to list a few (Avant, Swopes, Davis & Elhai, 2011). Additionally, victims of emotional abuse are more likely to have problems adjusting to different life circumstances, severe emotional disadvantage (Baker & Festinger, 2011) and struggle with low self-esteem (Otalvaro, 2015).
Quiz[edit | edit source]
Treatment[edit | edit source]
There are many different options of treatment for victims of emotional and psychological abuse including cognitive behavioural therapy, group therapy and counselling. Additionally, there are telephone hotlines individuals can ring for assistance.
Cognitive behavioural therapy[edit | edit source]
cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is therapy that considers both cognitive processes and behaviour patterns and how these two intercept (Kazantiz, Luong, Usatoff, Impala, Yew & Hofmann, 2018). CBT has a substantial amount of research exploring its efficiency and is one of the best methods of treatment for adults suffering with psychological issues (Cuijpers, Berking, Quigley, Kleiboer & Dobson, 2013). However, CBT isn’t so successful with children compared to other processes such as group therapy (Macdonald, et al. 2012).
Group therapy[edit | edit source]
Group therapy involves the process of bringing a small community together that have experienced similar disadvantages in life to discuss and connect with each other (Heiman & Ettin, 2001). Group therapy has proved to be especially successful for child victims and offers opportunities for heeling and relating that normal therapy doesn’t offer (Heiman & Ettin, 2001). Research has suggested that CBT following by group therapy is the most successful form of treatment for victims of psychological abuse (Echeburua, Sarasua & Zubizarreta, 2013).
Jane Leigh (2013) explored the effective counselling methods that worked for her after her own personal experiences with trauma and abuse. Not limited to CBT, but also narrative/journal therapy helped her find creative freedom to heal. Jane also explored the benefits of grief and loss therapy, which focuses on the five stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. This therapy helped her to deal with all the things she lost and missed out on due to her trauma, to help her move forward. These methods of treatment were found to be the most beneficial in Janescase and are evidence of how counselling and therapy can be used to treat victims of emotional and psychological abuse (Leigh, 2013).
Conclusion[edit | edit source]
Emotional abuseoften referred to as psychological abuse is a well researched topic, especially in the childhood arena. This chapter explored the foundations of emotional abuse across ages, including the different forms that it can take and the many different types. Additionally, it explored how emotional abuse can take place in different sorts of relationships, and how such behaviour can have long lasting and detrimental affects on the victims involved. Attachment theory and social learning theory was explored, and how these psychological theories interact with emotional abuse. Lastly, psychological disorders and treatment options are vast, therapy and other such treatment options have proved to be successful in helping victims recover for such trauma.
See also[edit | edit source]
- Compliments, emotion and motivation (Book chapter, 2018)
- Punishment as a motivator (Book chapter, 2014)
- Revenge motivation (Book chapter, 2015)
- Rewards, punishments and social cooperation (Book chapter, 2019)
- Jealousy (Book chapter, 2013)
- Child emotional abuse (Book chapter, 2014)
- Emotional abuse in romantic relationships (Book chapter, 2019)
- Motivation and emotion/Book/2014/Emotional manipulation by others (Book chapter, 2014)
- Punishment as a motivator (Book chapter, 2014)
- Sexual violence motivation (Book chapter, 2014)
- Psychological abuse (Wikipedia)
- Group Therapy (Wikipedia)
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External Links[edit | edit source]
- Domestic violence hotlines (whiteribbon.org)
- It's Time to Talk about Psychological and Verbal Abuse (Informational video)
- 5 Signs of Emotional Abuse (Informational video)
- Relationship Red Flags of Abuse (Informational video)
- 6 Signs of Mental Abuse (Youtube video)