Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Student engagement and learning

Heading casing

Hi U3167879. FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example: Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development -- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:49, 24 August 2021 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title Excellent User page Excellent - used effectively Description about self provided Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks. Link provided to book chapter Social contribution Very good Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Headings Basic, 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. Key points Key points are well developed for almost all sections, with relevant citations. Overview - Consider adding: an example or case study Excellent use of in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Direct quotes need page numbers (APA style) - even better, write in your own words. Consider including more examples/case studies. Conclusion (the most important section): hasn't been developed what might the take-home, practical messages be? in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question in the sub-title? Figure Excellent Be selective about which figures are most relevant. Expand figure captions to better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text. Cite each figure at least once in the main text. References OK For APA referencing style, check and correct: include issue numbers italicisation doi formatting Move video to External links Remember that the goal is to identify and use the best academic theory and research about this topic. Resources Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:21, 4 September 2021 (UTC)

General feedback

Hi. I have provided some comprehensive feedback below:

1. I would initially consider revising the long heading you have: "2.1 What factors influence how student engagement can be fostered to improve learning?" -> Far too long.

2. I like the use of the focus question box and the engaging pictures :)

3. Perhaps make figure #2 bigger?

4. You should consider linking words in the text to alternative sources for example in the overview, I would link the words: ""disinterested", "disengaged", "educators". Do this throughout with words that stand out and need defining. For an example see this chapter:

https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Motivation_and_emotion/Book/2021/Indigenous_Australian_well-being

5. I would change the overview. I find it to be quite informal and 'chatty'. An element of this is fine, but I would make it more professional where possible. I would also make it more informative. You need to explicitly say what the chapter will cover, give some more background and nicely summarise what the reader will be reading! Check out the chapter I linked above ^ or alternatively have a look at older chapters.

6. "Table one" title should be below it, as per APA. I really like that you linked the heading in the table to links!!!

7. Consider making headings in the coloured info boxes centred, bold and bigger. I really like the section on SDT because it is colourful and interactive. But you need to make the little headings stand out.

8. I am assuming the autonomy and motivation section is incomplete. I like the pictures throughout, however! Happy editing :)

General feedback 2

Hi,

I saw the link to your book chapter on the discussion page and I have had a look at it for you. I have some general feedback, I have added some clarification templates to the chapter with more detailed descriptions below. The numbered list matches the clarification templates and is in the order they occur in your chapter:

General points:

• Great use of focus boxes and examples to aid in the descriptions of the ‘seeds’.
• Very well written, and easy to follow and understand, with informative and interesting figures and pictures
• Very good idea to have the ‘Key points’ boxes at the end of the sections
• You may need to confirm the location of the table caption. In the examples page provided by James, all the titles are at the top of the table, and my referencing guide says the title and 'Table 1' is at the top. The following links show what James has provided:
• https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Motivation_and_emotion/Assessment/Chapter/Tables
• https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Motivation_and_emotion/Wikiversity/Tables

Detailed points:

1. My resource on secondary referencing for APA 7 says that the word ‘in’ should be used instead of ‘by’
2. “…pressure and higher enjoyment…” – Should this be “lowers pressure and results in higher enjoyment”?
3. “…it is elementary for an educator to 'tell' or 'direct' students…” - Perhaps clarify what you are suggesting about this method by saying it is ‘elementary’
4. “…is a factor the influences…” – change ‘the’ to ‘that’
5. “Intrinsic motivation fosters the highest level of autonomy (Figure 8) and in the SDT framework, providing scaffolding for autonomy support (AS) in the classroom.” – Some awkwardness in this sentence – Remove ‘and’? Or possibly use “fosters the highest level of autonomy (Figure 8) in the SDT framework, and provides scaffolding for autonomy support (AS) in the classroom”.
6. “AS is shown by an educator's respect for the students’ opinions and feelings, providing opportunities to choose, encouragement of independent problem-solving, and provision of time for thinking.” – A bit awkward. Perhaps you could say “AS is shown by an educator's respect for the students’ opinions and feelings, the provision of opportunities for choice and time for thinking, and the encouragement of independent problem-solving.

(U3186267 (discuss • contribs) 04:23, 7 October 2021 (UTC)

General feedback 3

Hi! Iv’e found a video which I thought might be useful to include in your external links. It’s a Tedtalk which discusses emotional engagement in learning and provides 5 key characteristics :) - --TaraU3187760 (discuss • contribs) 12:38, 14 October 2021 (UTC) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfXNn51OoxM

General feedback 4

Hi there! Read through your chapter and it's fantastic how interactive it is, however, figures 1 and 10 are very cute but do not contribute to the topic. --U3203392 (discuss • contribs) 20:49, 17 October 2021 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a very good chapter. It is very well written, makes excellent use of interactive learning features, and provides a cogent, focused theoretical summary. The main area for potential improvement is to provide a more indepth, critical review of relevant research. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Overview Well developed Overview. Clear focus question(s). A case study or example could help to help engage reader interest. Theory — Breadth A good range of relevant theory is covered. SDT is the primary approach, which is appropriate to the topic. Basic psychological needs theory, including autonomy support are the main foci. I liked the garden analogy for SDT - but would suggest that it might work better by conceiving a person as a seed, and autonomy, competence, and relatedness as the sunlight, water, and nutrients necessary for growth. Useful examples and key point summaries are used. The chapter doesn't wander off into discussion of irrelevant theory. Theory — Depth Appropriate depth is provided about the selected theory(ies). Illustrative case studies could be added to help demonstrate the theoretical ideas in action. Key citations are well used. However, non-peer reviewed sources shouldn't be cited. Tables and/or lists are used effectively to help clearly convey key theoretical information. Research — Key findings Overall, this chapter makes insufficient use of relevant psychological research. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. Research — Critical thinking There is little in the way of critical review of research. Critical thinking could be evidenced by discussing the direction and strength of relationships between constructs of interest, based on empirical research. Critical thinking could be further evidenced by: considering the strength of relationships. The conclusion doesn't offer any critique of the existing body of research. When describing important research findings, include more detail about the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) and results (e.g., size of effect or relationship). Integration The chapter places more emphasis on theory than research, thus there is little integration between theory and research. Conclusion Well developed. Clear take-home messages. Written expression — Style Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is very good to excellent. Only cite academic peer-reviewed sources; move non-peer-reviewed sources to the external links section. Headings should use default wiki style (e.g., remove additional bold). Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned"). Instead: it is, most often, not needed at all, or use section linking. Layout The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. Grammar is generally very good. Check and correct use of that vs. who. Use serial commas[1] - they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's an explanatory video (1 min). APA style is generally very good. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). Figures and tables Images are very well used. Fantastic that you created and uploaded your own images. Use APA style for Table captions. See example. Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics). Each Table and Figure is referred to at least once within the main text. Citations use correct APA style. References use correct APA style. Written expression — Learning features Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Basic use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Links to non-peer-reviewed sources should be moved to the external links section. Excellent use of image(s). Excellent use of table(s). Excellent use of feature box(es). Excellent/Very good/Good/Basic/No use of quiz(zes). Some use of case studies or examples. 1]]. Social contribution ~20 logged, useful, mostly minor social contributions, most with direct links to evidence.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:20, 29 October 2021 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic presentation. Overview An opening slide with the title and sub-title is displayed. Also narrate the title and sub-title - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Create an engaging introduction to hook audience interest. Establish a context for the topic, to help the viewer understand. Briefly explain why this topic is important. Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages. This will help to focus and discipline the presentation. Content Comments about the book chapter may also apply to this section. The presentation addresses the topic. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The presentation makes basic use of relevant psychological theory. This presentation provides mostly general motivational theory. The presentation makes basic use of relevant psychological research. Include citations. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies. Conclusion A Conclusion slide is presented with basic take-home message(s). Audio The audio is easy to follow. The presentation makes basic use of narrated audio. Audio communication is well paced. Good intonation enhances listener interest and engagement. Audio recording quality was very good. Mute the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio. Video Overall, visual display quality is good. The presentation makes basic use of animated slides. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. The amount of text presented per slide makes it easy to read and listen at the same time. The presentation is basically produced using Moovly. Meta-data The chapter title is used, but the sub-title (or a shortened version of it) is not used, as the name of the presentation. The sub-title (or an abbreviation of the sub-title that fits within the 100 character limit) would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. A written description of the presentation is provided. Links to and from the book chapter are provided. The presentation is incorrectly categorised as being for kids. This introduces limitations, such as being unable to add the presentation to a playlist. More info. Licensing Image sources and their copyright status are communicated. A copyright license for the presentation is provided in the presentation description but not in the meta-data.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:15, 23 November 2021 (UTC)