Hey! I just made some spelling and grammar changes to your paper, looks great. I was wondering if racial profiling would be relevant to your paper? Goodluck [[1]] 13/10/2021 4:15 (UTC)
Latest comment: 3 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
Hi, the topic you have chosen is extremely interesting, it immediately caught my attention. The key points you have so far look great and are well thought out. I'm wondering if you have seen the show Criminal Minds?, it's all about criminal profiling and can give you great insight about your topic! --U3199141 (discuss • contribs) 04:53, 29 August 2021 (UTC)Reply
Latest comment: 3 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
Hello! I just finished going through your chapter and it is looking so interesting. I do have a very minor formatting suggestion but I think the layout of your chapter would flow better if the quiz and the glossary were separate. It will help the visual progression through your chapter. I also added an external link to a Podcast called Real Crime Profile. I think this could provide further details around the practical side of profiling as the podcast included multiple cases of a behavioural analyst profiling real crime cases. Hope this helps :)
--U3203008 (discuss • contribs) 13:07, 29 August 2021 (UTC)Reply
Latest comment: 3 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
Hi there!
Great start on your book chapter, and all the best as you keep chipping away at it! I do have a couple of pointers that I hope are helpful as you keep writing. Firstly, I know it's still in the early stages of drafting, but it is important to use a consistent style of referencing. If you do choose to go with the wikipedia referencing, footnotes go after a full stop like this.[1] Here is a link to the wikipedia guide: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Citing_sources#Footnotes . Secondly, you might want to consider focussing on the question to remove unnecessary words. It is an application question, and as such, you might consider practical aspects of criminal profiling. Although this is a relatively old article, it might be helpful: https://doi.org/10.1002/bsl.2370040405 . Finally, I was a bit confused about the image in the first paragraph. Isn't criminal profiling concerned with behaviour rather than appearance? The image seems to suggest that it involves appearance of the offender too.
I hope these points help, and you have a rewarding end to the semester!
Latest comment: 3 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.
Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.
Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.
Use default heading formatting (e.g., avoid bold, italics, underline etc.).
Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings.
Remove colons at the end of headings.
Key findings and implications + Further research and improvements - probably these sections could be covered by previous sections and/or the Conclusion section instead.
Direct quotes need page numbers (APA style) - even better, write in your own words. Use double-quotation marks for direct quotes less than 40 words. Even better, write in your own words.
Avoid overuse of italics.
Instead of a glossary, use in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Several of these are already provided - well done.
Overview
clearly outlines the problem and what will be covered
focus questions
an image
an example or case study
For sections which include sub-section include key points for an overview paragraph prior to branching into the sub-headings.
Unclear how the FAE and CD relate to criminal profiling - are these the most relevant psychological theories??
Avoid having a long quiz at the end - it is better to instead have one or two questions at the end of each major section to test whether readers have understood the take-home message from each section.
Conclusion (the most important section):
partially developed
what might the take-home, practical messages be?
in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title?
Latest comment: 3 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
Hey, I'd just like to say that you've put in some great effort into your topic! It can be a pretty precarious one but you've handled it quite well. I also found it rather interesting. As a previous suggestion mentioned, when using footnotes, make sure punctuation is before the reference (e.g., 'criminality.[1]'). I've made that mistake too. I've taken the liberty of fixing three of the ones I could see for you. Best of luck with it, and the rest of your units this semester
--Robert.E.House (discuss • contribs) 10:53, 17 October 2021 (UTC)Reply
This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.
Overall, this is a promising, solid that uses psychological theory, but not much research, to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
Over the maximum word count. More selectivity about what to include is needed.
For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits.
Reduce the amount of theoretical content so that the chapter is within the maximum word count and to give more room for focusing on reviewing research. For example, the material about motivated reasoning, whilst interesting, it not about profiling of criminals per se, but rather a potential bias for investigators to try to avoid.
Consider presenting the CP techniques first, followed by the theory. This might help a reader to understand the topic.
Overall, there is too much depth about the selected theory(ies). Either select fewer theories or cover them in less detail, with links to further information.
Some useful examples are provided to illustrate theoretical concepts.
Overall, the quality of written expression is very good.
Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in parentheses at the end of the sentence.
Reduce use of weasel words (e.g., "imperative implications") which bulk out the text, but don't enhance meaning.
Layout
Perhaps a better structure could be start with "Fundamental assumptions of criminal profiling" and "How criminal profiling is used by law enforcement agencies" and then move to theories. At least, I think, that would be easier for a reader to follow and understand.
Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').[3].
Abbreviations
Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses.
APA style
Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159).
Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numerals (e.g., 10).
Overall, the use of learning features is very good.
Format bullet-points and numbered lists, per Tutorial 1.
Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles.
No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
Basic use of image(s).
Good use of table(s).
Very good use of feature box(es).
Very good use of quiz(zes).
Consider whether the quiz questions could be more effective as learning prompts by being embedded as single questions within each corresponding section.
Latest comment: 3 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.
The opening slide does not present and narrate the correct title and sub-title, thus there is a mismatch between the focus of the book chapter and the accompanying presentation .
Briefly explain why this topic is important.
Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages.
Comments about the book chapter also apply to this section.
This presentation doesn't adequately address the topic.
It is unclear why the focus of the presentation is on motivated reasoning in criminal profiling. This has drifted from the original topic: "Criminal profiling: How is criminal profiling used by law enforcement agencies?".
The selection of content is poor because it doesn't provide a sufficient overview of the most relevant psychological theory and research about how criminal profiling is used to determine the motivations of those who commit crimes. Instead, the focus is on cognitive biases of investigators using motivated reasoning.
The presentation makes insufficient use of relevant psychological theory. More information about the theories mentioned at ~00:40 secs would be useful.
The presentation makes insufficient use of relevant psychological research.
The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies.
A Conclusion slide is presented with a basic take-home message(s).
The presentation could be strengthened by expanding on the take-home message (e.g., answers to more than one focus questions that are more directly relevant to the original topic).
The correct chapter title and sub-title are missing from the name of the presentation - this would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
A written description of the presentation is not provided.