Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/Survivor guilt

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for sentence casing. For example, the wikitext should be: == Cats and mice == rather than == Cats and Mice == -- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:39, 21 September 2020 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title Title and sub-title have been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents Authorship details removed - authorship is as per the page's editing history User page Confusing layout - consider simplifying About me Add description about self Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks. Add internal link to book chapter (see Tutorial 1 for how to) Social contribution Excellent - summarised with direct link(s) to evidence. Section headings Overly complicated 3-level structure - consider simplifying e.g., a lot of what has been styled as a heading should be normal text, not a heading. Aim for 3 to 6 top-level headings between the Overview and Conclusion, with up to a similar number of sub-headings for large sections. Remove colons from the end of headings See earlier comment about Heading casing. Key points Partially developed Overview is missing Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Consider including more examples/case studies. Use peer-reviewed academic sources. Use APA style for citations. Conclusion (the most important section): hasn't been developed what might the take-home, practical messages be? in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question in the sub-title? Image An image (figure) is presented. Caption does not use APA style e.g, replace colon with a period. could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text. Cite each figure at least once in the main text. References OK For APA referencing style, check and correct: placement order of journal name capitalisation Resources Excellent See also Use standard formatting Move external link to external link section Include source in brackets after link Also link to relevant Wikipedia pages External links None

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:39, 21 September 2020 (UTC)

Overview

Hey, just a suggestion that the 'define guilt as an emotion and survivor guilt' should maybe go in an introduction section after the overview, as the overview is more of an abstract. You may also want to put the key questions in the overview. Otherwise what you have so far look goods, and will be interesting to read when it's finished --Laurenpeel (discuss • contribs) 02:54, 6 October 2020 (UTC)

Hi, here's a useful link that looked at survival guilt in a clinical psychological perspective. Niederland, W. (1981). The Survivor Syndrome: Further Observations and Dimensions. Journal Of The American Psychoanalytic Association, 29(2), 413-425. doi: 10.1177/00030651810290020706:47,-- User:OwenUC18 October 2020 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is an insufficient chapter. Addressing the topic development feedback could have helped to improve this chapter. This chapter is over the maximum word count. This chapter makes insufficient use of primary, peer-reviewed sources as citations. Almost all claims are in this chapter are unsubstantiated and unreferenced (e.g., see the tags). Without the minimal basic requirement of providing citations for claims, this chapter is insufficient as a piece of undergraduate academic work in a scientific discipline. Overview - consider building on the sub-title by presenting focus questions to help guide the reader and the chapter structure. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Theory Overall, this chapter makes promising use of theory, but it is insufficient due to the lack of citation of peer-reviewed psychological knowledge. There is too much general theoretical material (e.g., about guilt, biology of emotion, etc.). Instead, summarise and link to further information (such as other book chapters or Wikipedia articles), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question). The description of SG ties it the experience of trauma and PTSD, but it could be made more clear throughout that it is more likely to occur as a result of certain types of traumatic experiences, not all types. Research Overall, this chapter makes insufficient use of research. There is insufficient citation of academic, peer-reviewed research about this topic. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicating the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. Written expression Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is basic, but is below professional standard because there is insufficient citation of the best available academic, peer-reviewed literature about the topic. Use 3rd person perspective rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you")[1]. Some sentences are overly long; consider splitting them into shorter, separate sentences. "People" is often a better term than "individuals"; similarly "participants" is preferred to "subjects". Layout See earlier comments about heading casing. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings. Learning features See also - move external links to the external links section. Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Good use of image(s). Good use of table(s). No use of feature box(es). Basic use of quiz(zes). The quiz questions could be more effective as learning prompts by being embedded as single questions within each corresponding section rather than being presented as a set of questions at the end. Basic use of case studies or examples. Grammar The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Use serial commas[2] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's a 1 min. explanatory video. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals'; and its vs. it's; 1950's vs 1950s etc.). Check and correct use of affect vs. effect. Abbreviations Once an abbreviation is established (e.g., PTSD), use it consistently. Don't set up an abbreviation and then not use it or only use it sometimes. Spelling Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the tags). Proofreading More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard (e.g., super-ego vs. super ego). Remove unnecessary capitalisation. Replace double spaces with single spaces. APA style In general, do not capitalise the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc.. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). Direct quotes need page numbers and the citation year. Figures and tables Use APA style for Table captions. See example. Refer to each Table and Figure at least once within the main text (e.g., see Figure 1). Citations are not in full APA style. References are not in full APA style. For example: Move non-peer-reviewed sources to the external links section. Check and correct use of capitalisation.. Include hyperlinked dois. Social contribution ~1 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence. ~6 logged social contributions without direct links to evidence, so unable to easily verify and assess.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:30, 17 November 2020 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a reasonably good, promising presentation. This presentation makes creative use of Powtoon. Structure and content An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The presentation is well structured. The presentation makes good use of theory. The presentation makes little use of research. The presentation makes good use of one or more examples or case studies. Add and narrate a Title slide, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s). Communication The presentation is fun, easy to follow, and interesting to watch and listen to. The presentation makes effective use of animated slides. Well paced. Excellent pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point. Excellent intonation to enhance listener interest and engagement. Some text was displayed but not narrated. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. Production quality The usability of the video could be improved by exporting to a commonly used video hosting platform such as YouTube or Vimeo. Title/sub-title The wording and/or formatting/grammar of the title/sub-title is inconsistent between the name of the video, the opening slide, and/or the book chapter. Communicate the chapter title and sub-title in both the video title and on the opening slide - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Audio recording quality was very good. Visual display quality was very good. Consider how the "Pro+" watermark could be removed. Consider muting the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided. An active link to the book chapter is not provided. A link from the book chapter is provided. A written description of the presentation is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:40, 20 November 2020 (UTC)