Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/PERMA model of well-being

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Topic development feedback[edit source]

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title and sub-title[edit source]

  1. Excellent

User page[edit source]

  1. Excellent - used effectively
  2. Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Excellent - summarised with direct link(s) to evidence.
  2. If editing a page that already exists on Wikiversity, add direct links to evidence like this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Well developed 2-level heading structure, with meaningful headings that directly relate to the core topic.
  2. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings.
  3. See earlier comment about Heading casing.
  4. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Overview - Consider adding:
    1. an image
    2. an example or case study
  2. Key points are well developed for each section, with relevant citations.
  3. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters.
  4. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  5. Consider embedding one quiz question per main section rather than one longer quiz towards the end.

Image[edit source]

  1. Excellent
  2. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. For APA referencing style, check and correct:
    1. capitalisation
    2. italicisation
    3. doi formatting
    4. Remove "Retrieved from" (no longer part of APA style as of 7th edition)

Resources[edit source]

    1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:52, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

Formatting ideas[edit source]

Hi User:U3170318, there's some good information in the purple text box in the positive emotion section, but it may be a bit more readable in the form of a table, e.g. 1st column could be the emotion and second column would be details about it.

Also, the caption to Figure 2 showing the PERMA model may need a reference at the end of it if it has been adapted from somewhere else, i.e. Figure 2. Seligman’s PERMA Model of Well-being. Adapted from Author (year).

--U3186080 (discusscontribs) 11:59, 16 October 2020 (UTC)

Heading casing[edit source]

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FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example:

Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory

Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:40, 13 November 2020 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter does an OK job of explaining the relevance of the PERMA model to well-being.
  2. Overview - consider building on the sub-title by presenting focus questions to help guide the reader and the chapter structure.
  3. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Relevant theory is described.
  2. Perhaps greater use of case studies could help to describe each of the five aspects of PERMA in action.

Research[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter provides a basic overview of relevant research.
  2. The critique of measurement is confusing - which measure(s) are being critiqued?
  3. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicating the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  4. Great to see emphasis on one meta-analysis - more would be helpful.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is OK.
    2. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    3. "People" is often a better term than "individuals"; similarly "participants" is preferred to "subjects".
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing.
  3. Learning features
    1. Minimal use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. See example.
    2. Minimal use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding more in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    3. Ideally, use in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Other links can be moved to the external links section.
    4. Basic use of image(s).
    5. Excellent use of table(s).
    6. Very good use of feature box(es).
    7. No use of quiz(zes).
  4. Grammar
    1. Check and make correct use of commas.
    2. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').[1].
  5. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour).
  6. Proofreading
    1. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard (e.g., consistency of wellbeing vs. well-being).
    2. Replace double spaces with single spaces.
  7. APA style
    1. In general, do not capitalise the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc..
    2. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159).
      1. Refer to each Table and Figure at least once within the main text (e.g., see Figure 1).
    3. Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numerals (e.g., 10).
    4. Figures and tables
      1. Use APA style for Figure captions. See example.
      2. Use APA style for Table captions. See example.
      3. Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics, check and correct capitalisation).
    5. Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. If there are three or more authors, cite the first author followed by et al., then year. For example, either:
        1. in-text, Smith et al. (2020), or
        2. in parentheses (Smith et al., 2020)
      2. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    6. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~21 claimed contributions but almost all without direct links to evidence, so unable to easily verify and assess

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:40, 13 November 2020 (UTC)


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an excellent presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little.
  2. The presentation is well structured.
  3. Add and narrate a Title slide, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation.
  4. Consider adding and narrating an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  5. The presentation makes excellent use of theory.
  6. The presentation makes excellent use of research.
  7. The presentation makes excellent of one or more examples or case studies.
  8. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s).

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation is fun, easy to follow, and interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. The presentation makes effective use of animated slides and video with narrated audio.
  3. Well paced. Excellent pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  4. Excellent intonation to enhance listener interest and engagement.
  5. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  6. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images and video.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. The video is very well produced.
  2. The title/sub-title are missing in the title and opening slide.
  3. Audio recording quality was excellent.
  4. Visual display quality was excellent.
  5. Mute the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio.
  6. Image sources and their copyright status are provided.
  7. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  8. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  9. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  10. A written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:22, 22 November 2020 (UTC)