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Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Body image flexibility

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Latest comment: 4 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

Some points you could add

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I am doing psychological flexibility and emotional health, number 86 in the emotion topics. Have a look at my chapter and my references if you need some ideas for more points to add. A chunk of my research is about acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) which I think would be a relevant area of research for your chapter. It is for managing psychological distress and emotion regulation, so is implemented for a variety of reasons for a lot of different people. Would also be good to add some more pictures or other things to break up the text, like quizzes in different sections.

Good luck with your chapter

--U3174128 (discusscontribs) 06:51, 19 October 2019 (UTC)U3174128Reply


Topic development feedback

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The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title

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  1. Content and capitalisation of the title/sub-title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents

User page

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  1. Created, with very basic info about self
  2. Add link to book chapter

Social contribution

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  1. Summarise contribution

Section headings

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  1. Overly nested structure - consider simplifying.
  2. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings.
  3. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  4. Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then focus most of the content on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title.

Key points

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  1. The key theoretical basis for BIF is acceptance and commitment theory - currently not explained.
  2. Use APA style for citations (e.g., include the citation inside the sentence).
  3. Basic development of key points for some sections.
  4. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters.
  5. Consider introducing a case study in the Overview.
  6. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end.
  1. An image (figure) is presented, but it does not appear to be relevant to the topic.
  2. Caption uses APA style.
  3. Caption could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text.
  4. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References

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  1. OK.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Include volume number
    2. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html

Resources

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  1. See also
    1. Use internal link style per Tutorial 1
  2. External links
    1. Use external link style per Tutorial 1

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:11, 29 September 2019 (UTC)Reply

Contribution

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Hey, i've read over your chapter and im sure there is still a lot of information that you are going to add, however by looking at the titles i see that you havent included eating disorders, and as your topic is closely related to eating disorders i thought it may be benficial to add some more information about certain types of eating disorders so it is more obvious how body image flexibility is used to help treat these eating disorders. Ive linked a journal article which focuses on incorporating body image flexibility into treatment of eating disorders and it shows very promising results. Hope this helps :) --U3160677 (discusscontribs) 04:10, 20 October 2019 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:25, 23 November 2019 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a basic, insufficient chapter. The chapter needs professional assistance with the quality of written expression and a more indepth review of BIF theory and research.
  2. Overview - provide some background to the focus questions. Consider adding an example and an image.
  3. For additional feedback, see following comments and these copyedits.
  1. Overall, this chapter makes basic use of theory.
  2. There is probably too much theoretical material about body image more generally, rather than body image flexibility. For example, a simple but important improvement to this chapter would be to cover the theoretical components of psychological flexibility and/or body image flexibility.
  1. Overall, this chapter makes basic use of relevant research.
  2. When describing important research findings, consider including a more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful.
  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is poor (i.e., below professional standard).
    2. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    3. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    4. Direct quotes should be embedded within sentences and paragraphs, rather than dumped holus-bolus. Even better, communicate the concept in your own words.
  2. Layout
    1. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
    2. See earlier comments about heading casing.
  3. Learning features
    1. Basic use of embedded interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive.
    2. No use of embedded links to related book chapters. Embedding links links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    3. Basic use of images.
    4. No use of tables.
    5. No use of feature boxes.
    6. No use of quizzes.
    7. Limited use of case studies or examples.
  4. Grammar
    1. The grammar for many sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    2. Check and make correct use of commas.
    3. Check and correct use of affect vs. effect.
    4. Abbreviations
      1. Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses.
  5. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour; fulfillment vs. fulfilment).
  6. Proofreading
    1. Remove unnecessary capitalisation (e.g., Body Image).
  7. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. Figures and tables
      1. Use APA style for Figure captions. See example.
      2. Refer to each Table and Figure at least once within the main text (e.g., see Figure 1).
    3. Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Citations should be included within a sentence, not outside it.
      2. Do not include author names and initials.
    4. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.
      3. See new doi format.
  1. ~1 logged, trivial, social contributions with direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:25, 23 November 2019 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is an insufficient presentation.
  2. This presentation makes use of simple tools.
  3. The presentation is well under the maximum time limit.
  1. How does the viewer know what BIF is? Explain abbreviations.
  2. A lack of sufficient depth of BIF theory, research, and practical example.
  3. Add and narrate an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  4. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.
  1. Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  2. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  3. The visual communication is supplemented by images.
  1. Communicate the chapter title and sub-title in both the video title and on the opening slide - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. There is no need for the health warning at the start. This should be an academic overview of interest to a broad audience.
  3. Audio recording quality was OK. It varied a bit between slides. Probably an on-board microphone was used because keyboard clicks were audible. Consider using an external microphone.
  4. Mute the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio.
  5. Visual display quality was good.
  6. Image sources and their copyright status are provided.
  7. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.
  8. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  9. A link from the book chapter was not correctly provided (now fixed).
  10. A written description of the presentation is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:37, 23 November 2019 (UTC)Reply