The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.
Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.
Hi! Really like your plan so far, i found a reference that discusses the role of childhood maltreatment and body disatisfaction that I thought would fit in perfectly with your chapter. While the article focuses on body disatisfaction and smartphone use I thought it could be a possible direction for you to take in the 'age' subheading as a possible risk factor? Good luck!
--U3174136 (discuss • contribs) 06:59, 12 October 2019 (UTC)
Hey, I really like what you've got so far, it would be a great topic to look at different case studies and maybe comparisons of risk factors for different age groups and genders. Good luck! --U3162204 (discuss • contribs) 10:30, 15 October 2019 (UTC)
Hi! My chapter is about social comparison, social media and emotion. There is a section within my chapter about body image and envy. I think this can help you to get some ideas on your topic and to find references you can use!
If you want, you can add my book chapter in your see also section. Good luck! :) --U3145293 (discuss • contribs) 06:31, 19 October 2019 (UTC)
Hi! I really enjoyed reading your chapter on this topic. I especially enjoyed your case studies and think that they are very helpful in understanding the more difficult or complicated concepts.--U3144248 (discuss • contribs) 21:15, 20 October 2019 (UTC)
This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.
Overall, this is a reasonably good chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and some research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. The chapter could be improved by providing a more detailed review of research and improving the quality of written, mainly grammar and, in particular, the use of commas.
The Overview is too general; make it more specific to the topic. The focus questions are more focused, but could also be improved by being more refined. The case study is helpful.
Some relevant theory is considered. Also consider social comparison theory and perhaps, for treatment, acceptance and commitment therapy.
There is too much general theoretical material (e.g., Maslow's hierarchy of needs). Instead, summarise and link to further information, to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).
Overall, this chapter makes insufficient use of research.
Use more up to date WHO references.
Did you consult James (1884), Maslow (1943) etc.? If not, they should be a secondary citation.
When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful.
Some statements are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags).
Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in brackets at the end of the sentence.
Avoid having sections with only one sub-section.
Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.