Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Body image and emotional well-being

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Heading casing[edit source]

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:27, 28 September 2019 (UTC)


Topic development feedback[edit source]

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title and sub-title[edit source]

  1. Capitalisation of the title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents

User page[edit source]

  1. Created, with description about self and link to book chapter

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Summarised with indirect link to evidence.
  2. Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.

Section headings[edit source]

  1. See earlier comment about Heading casing.
  2. Basic, 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development
  3. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  4. Perhaps consider making the emphasis on specific theories more obvious in the choice of headings.
  5. Factors of influence could be stronger if it was tied to theory.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Remove or adapt generic template content.
  2. Direct quotes need page numbers; even better, write in your own words.
  3. Basic development of key points for each section, with relevant citations.
  4. Overview - Consider adding focus questions.
  5. Consider introducing a case study in the Overview.
  6. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  7. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section.
  8. Perhaps consider "body image flexibility".

Image[edit source]

  1. An image (figure) is presented.
  2. Caption uses APA style.
  3. Caption explains how the image connects to key points being made in the main text.
  4. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. OK.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use correct capitalisation
    2. Use correct italicisation
    3. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html
    4. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources[edit source]

  1. Good

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:27, 28 September 2019 (UTC)

Social contribution[edit source]

Hi! Really like your plan so far, i found a reference that discusses the role of childhood maltreatment and body disatisfaction that I thought would fit in perfectly with your chapter. While the article focuses on body disatisfaction and smartphone use I thought it could be a possible direction for you to take in the 'age' subheading as a possible risk factor? Good luck! --U3174136 (discusscontribs) 06:59, 12 October 2019 (UTC)

Hey, I really like what you've got so far, it would be a great topic to look at different case studies and maybe comparisons of risk factors for different age groups and genders. Good luck! --U3162204 (discusscontribs) 10:30, 15 October 2019 (UTC)

Hi! My chapter is about social comparison, social media and emotion. There is a section within my chapter about body image and envy. I think this can help you to get some ideas on your topic and to find references you can use! If you want, you can add my book chapter in your see also section. Good luck! :) --U3145293 (discusscontribs) 06:31, 19 October 2019 (UTC)

Hi! I really enjoyed reading your chapter on this topic. I especially enjoyed your case studies and think that they are very helpful in understanding the more difficult or complicated concepts.--U3144248 (discusscontribs) 21:15, 20 October 2019 (UTC)


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a reasonably good chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and some research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. The chapter could be improved by providing a more detailed review of research and improving the quality of written, mainly grammar and, in particular, the use of commas.
  2. The Overview is too general; make it more specific to the topic. The focus questions are more focused, but could also be improved by being more refined. The case study is helpful.
  3. The Conclusion is excellent.
  4. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Some relevant theory is considered. Also consider social comparison theory and perhaps, for treatment, acceptance and commitment therapy.
  2. There is too much general theoretical material (e.g., Maslow's hierarchy of needs). Instead, summarise and link to further information, to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).

Research[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter makes insufficient use of research.
  2. Use more up to date WHO references.
  3. Did you consult James (1884), Maslow (1943) etc.? If not, they should be a secondary citation.
  4. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  5. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful.
  6. Some statements are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags).

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Use active rather than passive voice[1].
    2. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned").
    3. Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in brackets at the end of the sentence.
  2. Layout
    1. Avoid having sections with only one sub-section.
    2. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. Learning features
    1. Basic use of interwiki links to Wikipedia articles.
    2. No use of embedded links to related book chapters.
    3. Basic use of images.
    4. Basic use of tables, but it is poorly formatted and not of much use.
    5. Very good use of feature boxes.
    6. Very basic use of a quiz.
    7. Basic use of case studies or examples.
  4. Grammar
    1. Check and make correct use of commas.
    2. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').
    3. Check and correct use of that vs. who.
  5. APA style
    1. Use APA style to refer to each Table and each Figure (e.g., correct capitalisation and italics).
    2. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.
      3. See new doi format.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~3 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:59, 10 November 2019 (UTC)


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a reasonably good presentation.
  2. This presentation makes effective use of simple tools.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Well selected content - not too much or too little.
  2. The presentation is well structured.
  3. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  4. A reasonably good Conclusion slide is presented. Perhaps some practical, take-home message(s) would be useful.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation is easy to follow.
  2. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides with narrated audio.
  3. Well paced.
  4. Some of the font size should be larger to make it easier to read.
  5. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. The chapter title and sub-title are used in the video title - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. The chapter title but not the sub-title are used in the opening slide - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  3. Audio recording quality was a bit quiet and faded out a bit in one place - review microphone set-up. Keyboard clicks can be heard, so perhaps an onboard rather than external microphone was used.
  4. Image sources (general) are provided.
  5. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  6. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  7. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  8. A brief written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:25, 17 November 2019 (UTC)