Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Gender transformation motivation

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Feedback[edit source]

Hey Jacinta! What an awesome topic. I was wondering if you had considered the angle of prevalence of mental health issues in the LGBTIQ+ population? There is a lot of research on this at the moment as it's quite topical (you could start here or here). Is it also possible that the [high rates of trauma experienced by trans people] could affect their motivation to transition? (Here's another link on this). Super interesting article here about parental responses to transgender youth, worth a read. Could influence early motivations and sum up some environmental impacts on motivation. Good luck with this topic Jacinta, can't wait to read the final version! --U3154661 (discusscontribs) 04:43, 3 September 2017 (UTC)

thought-provoking blog[edit source]

Hi, I found an interesting blog on Reddit where individuals are trying to explain why someone may change gender. This may be helpful as a point to start thinking about the motivation behind gender transformation. Really interesting topic - looking forward to reading this when you have completed. --U3038747 (discusscontribs) 02:28, 22 October 2017 (UTC)

Heading casing[edit source]

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 13:35, 17 October 2017 (UTC)


Topic development review and feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks will be available later via Moodle. Keep an eye on Announcements. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title, sub-title, TOC[edit source]

  1. Title/subtitle formatting corrected

User page[edit source]

  1. Created
  2. Used effectively

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. None summarised with links to evidence
  2. A contribution was found listed on the book chapter page and moved to the user page - needs a summary

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Basic, 1-level heading structure - would benefit from further development, perhaps using a 2-level structure.
  2. Avoid providing too much background/generic material. Instead briefly summarise background concepts and provide wiki links to further information. Then focus most of the content on directly answering the core question posed by the sub-title of chapter.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Very limited development

Image[edit source]

  1. Image embedded
  2. Consider enhancing image by adding APA style figure caption to help connect the image more strongly to key points being made in the text

References[edit source]

  1. Only one reference added
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html
    2. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources[edit source]

  1. None provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 13:35, 17 October 2017 (UTC)


Journal Article Suggestion[edit source]

Hey, your topic for the book chapter sounds really intriguing! I found this article on the UC Library based on how Female Friendships may promote/motivate gender transformation; http://journals.sagepub.com.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/doi/pdf/10.1177/1350506813515856 I hope you find it useful! --U3097480 (discusscontribs) 07:01, 23 August 2018 (UTC)

Hi, I am doing a similar book chapter topic to you and have found some journal articles which might be of use to you too. I also found that culture may in fact influence/ motivate non-conforming gender development. Hopefully these articles are useful.

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/15532739.2010.514217

https://search.proquest.com/docview/1033561743?pq-origsite=primo

Hi, I just wanted to extended on my feedback above (26 August 2018). In your section 'What drives people for transformation' another theory you could consider is Queer Theory. Queer Theory highlights the importance of social and cultural environments, in the formation of non-conforming gender identities. Queer theorists argue that the male-female gender binary is a form of social control and regulation. Thus queer theorists argue that individuals who identify as transgender, are resisting socialised gender conventions and exploring their true self. Queer theory might offer an alternative motivational explanation to supplement the medical explanations you have already discussed . I have listed one journal article below; http://journals.sagepub.com.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/doi/abs/10.1177/0533316405049369 --U3154928 (discusscontribs) 01:27, 15 October 2018 (UTC)

--User: dsaini3 • 7:59, 2 september 2018 (UTC) Hey , your topic seems of good interest and i remember one of the student in my class did a presentation on gender transformation. In terms of biology , this happens due to imbalance of hormones during fetal development in the womb , which creates a conflict in sex and gender and therefore naturally it could be corrected by some hormone replacement therapy and surgery . Here's the link that could be useful to you if you want to add the biological reason . Although , from my point of view , people should be treated the way they they want to be . https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK222286/. I hope you find this useful.(dsaini3)

Feedback[edit source]

Hi, I have added a Ted Talks source in your external links section (A collection of TED Talks (and more) on the topic of Transgender). Thanks--U3154928 (discusscontribs) 11:23, 16 October 2018 (UTC)

Image formatting[edit source]

Hey there, I've gone through and fixed your image captions to be inline with the APA 6th style (I added the word figure followed by a corresponding number), you can find a good guide here. Good luck with the rest of the assignment! --Brittany (u3117719) (discusscontribs) 03:22, 21 October 2018 (UTC)


Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title, sub-title, TOC[edit source]

  1. Very good

User page[edit source]

  1. Good

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Good
  2. Link doesn't go directly to evidence of contribution
  3. See suggestions for how to record social contributions

Section headings[edit source]

  1. OK, but proposed structure could be improved to develop a stronger chapter.
  2. Generic material such as "What is gender transformation?" isn't really needed - cover these concepts briefly within the Overview or subsequent sections, with links to dedicated Wikiversity/Wikipedia resources for more info. This will allow the bulk of the structure to be focused on addressing the core topic (the chapter's sub-title).
  3. I don't understand this heading: "Would anyone change gender, If no gender differences existed since birth?"
  4. The consequences section also isn't necessary because the topic is "What motivates gender transformation?"

Key points[edit source]

  1. Reasonably well developed
  2. Overview - consider adding a case study or example to help engage reader interest in the topic
  3. Conclusion - underdeveloped - this is the most important section

Image[edit source]

  1. Use APA style
  2. Increase size of Figure 2 so that it's easier to read without zooming

References[edit source]

  1. Good
  2. Use APA style
  3. For latest APA style recommended format for dois see http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2017/03/doi-display-guidelines-update-march-2017.html

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also - good
  2. External links - Include info about source/destination in brackets after the hyperlink - see example

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:58, 1 October 2018 (UTC)


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a promising chapter but is let down by the poor quality of written expression and a lack of integration of research.
  2. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Several relevant theories are discussed.
  2. I didn't understand the material about Money - would need better explanation.
  3. Many separate theories are discussed, but there is a lack of integration with research evidence.

Research[edit source]

  1. Relatively little research is discussed. Where it is discussed, more detail would useful.
  2. Some statements are unreferenced (see the [factual?] tags).

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is poor.
    2. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    3. Some sentences are overly long; consider splitting them into shorter, separate sentences.
    4. Some of the bullet-points should have been in full paragraph format.
  2. Layout
    1. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. Learning features
    1. Interwiki links are reasonably well used.
    2. Images are well used.
    3. Tables are well used.
    4. A quiz is used early on (although it is not clear why the quiz is placed in this particular spot).
    5. No use of case studies or examples.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading.
    1. The grammar in this chapter is poor and well below professional standard (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags) - professional assistance is recommended (e.g., see Academic Skills at UC).
    2. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard.
    3. Use serial commas.
    4. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the [spelling?] tags).
    5. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour).
  5. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. Use APA style for Table captions.
    3. Citations
      1. APA style is not used (e.g., don't include author's initials or first name, remove space from inside the open parenthesis).
      2. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    4. References are not in APA style e.g.,
      1. Check and correct capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct italicisation.
      3. See new doi format.
      4. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within volumes.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a reasonably good presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Many of the comments about the book chapter also apply to this section (especially the lack of review of research).
  2. In general, the content is well selected and structured - not too much or too little.
  3. Consider adding and narrating an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  4. The take-home messages were not motivation- or psychology-specific.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides with narrated audio.
  2. The presentation is well placed.
  3. The audio narration uses excellent intonation.
  4. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read in the time provided.
  5. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Audio and video recording quality was excellent.
  3. Images sources and copyright are not acknowledged.
  4. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  5. A link to and from the book chapter is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:26, 17 November 2018 (UTC)