Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Indigenous Australian well-being

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Comment[edit source]

Great topic! For interest, I thought this might be a good 'See Also' link. It it for the Back to Country project for Indigenous Australians, I've personally have connections with them and they are doing some fabulous work in particular with young indigenous males --U3193728 (discusscontribs) 02:03, 17 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Psychology and Indigenous people[edit source]

New article may be of interest: -- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:57, 18 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Little bit late but this is a clip about closing the gap could be useful for an external link, it mentions the schemas that people think aboriginal people are related to alcohol and drugs. --U3202710 (discusscontribs) 01:55, 17 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comment[edit source]

Wow, you have done so much for your chapter. I a few comments. First, regarding placement of modules and key learning. I acknowledge this is a work in progress but I found module one a little hard to read as it wrapped fro left to right under the key takeaways. Second, I found your image "Wellmob" very interesting and engaging. I have not see it before. Third, your first quiz. The second question is a little tricky because it does not note that you can select more than one. -- (u3167879 - |Talk - c 04:14, 18 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Awesome job Laura, very engaging and great balance between content, activities, and figures. A few things I would like to suggest: - consider adding sources to your case studies (just for plagiarism reasons) - consider exploring the recent events of COVID19 in Wilcannia, which has been heavily impacted - I also noticed for your independent tasks that it seems the resources for 1 & 2 are mixed around Great job! --J.Payten (discusscontribs) 00:57, 3 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hi Laura. I would suggest confirming the reference requirements because I note you have used two styles: APA and end note(?). One would provide consistency. I also note that you have only referred to your figure 4 image. One of the comments I had after the book topic was : Cite each figure at least once in the main text. To that end I have inserted figure 1 and 2 to assist, but I would suggest confirming requirements to ensure you do not lose easy marks. Hope this helps. --U3167879 (discusscontribs) 10:50, 3 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hi! Iv’e found a past book chapter which discusses Indigenous Australian transgenerational trauma and psychological well-being (2019). Might be useful to add to your ‘see also’ section :) - --TaraU3187760 (discusscontribs) 05:33, 16 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hello! Iv’e found a past book chapter which discusses Indigenous Australian transgenerational trauma (2020). Might also be useful to add to your ‘see also’ section :) --U3202315 (discusscontribs) 18:52, 17 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Heading casing[edit source]

Crystal Clear app ktip.svg
FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example:

Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory

Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:49, 1 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Topic development feedback[edit source]

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title[edit source]

  1. Excellent
  2. Removed "trigger warning" as the topic is about wellbeing and the audience is international.

User page[edit source]

  1. Excellent - used effectively
  2. Description about self provided, with link(s) to professional profile(s)
  3. Use an internal link to book chapter

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Very good
  2. Twitter - summarised with direct link(s) to evidence.
  3. Wikiversity - summarised with indirect link(s) to evidence. To add direct links: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.

Headings[edit source]

  1. Very good
  2. Remove Module numbers from headings - just use the default Wikiversity headings which include numbers.
  3. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings.
  4. See earlier comment about Heading casing.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Overall, very promising development of plan and content for this chapter.
  2. Make sure to address an international audience e.g., when referring to "Indigenous" it is often important to clarify when this is meant to be referring to "Indigenous Australians".
  3. For sections which include sub-section include key points for an overview paragraph prior to branching into the sub-headings.
  4. Avoid overcapitalisation (APA style) - more info
  5. Use bullet points (see Tutorial 1 - Using Wikiversity)
  6. Direct quotes need page numbers.
  7. Some of the external links in the main text would be better as citations (e.g., where they go to academic or grey literature such as government webpages).
  8. Excellent use of in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters.
  9. Very good ideas for case study(ies). Make sure to include at least one "success" story.
  10. An excellent balance of theory and research is evident.
  11. Excellent use of feature boxes and tables.
  12. Overview - Consider:
    1. replacing learnings with focus questions - learnings may go better in the conclusion (as take-home messages)
    2. an image
    3. an example or case study
  13. Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise general concepts and provide internal wiki links to other book chapters and/or Wikipedia pages for further information. Then focus most of the content of this chapter on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title.
  14. Key points are well developed for each section, with relevant citations.
  15. Conclusion (the most important section):
    1. underdeveloped
    2. what might the take-home, practical messages be?
    3. in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question in the sub-title?

Figure[edit source]

  1. A figure is presented.
  2. Caption: Include Figure X. ...
  3. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. Overall, excellent.
  2. Some are a bit confusing, so check and correct e.g., no. 23

Resources[edit source]

  1. Useful links
  2. Improve layout e.g., use bullet points; see previous example chapters

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:49, 1 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Indigenous Mental Health and Suicide Prevention Clearinghouse[edit source]

@LozGrace: This could be a useful resource for this chapter: Indigenous Mental Health and Suicide Prevention Clearinghouse (Australian Institute of Health and Welfare). -- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:40, 28 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Feedback[edit source]

Hi there!

Your book chapter looks great! Congrats on the work you have put into it so far! I do have a couple of suggestions which I hope are helpful. Firstly, referencing using footnotes (such as the wiki format), you need to put the footnote number after punctuation. So for example, your footnote numbers would look something like this.³ This is the link to the guide: . Secondly, I really liked your initial case study, but you might also like to link it to the case of Mabo v Queensland (No 2) which overturned the doctrine of terra nullius and recognised native title. It seems like it would be pertinent to your chapter. This is a summary because the full judgment is quite long: . Thirdly, you might like to add a couple more references into the chapter, particularly after definitions. For instance, "one might condense wellbeing into" or "holistic wellbeing is defined as" could be followed by a source to both acknowledge where you got the defintion and to add weight to the statement. You might also want to use definitions which are specific for psychology such as the APA dictionary or a theory article (maybe this one might be good for wellbeing ) rather than the Oxford english dictionary.

Hope these suggestions help. All the best with the rest of the semester!!

U3202904 (discusscontribs) 22:50, 13 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]