The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.
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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.
Overall, this chapter does a reasonably good job of applying psychological theory and research to a real-world problem.
Theory is reasonably well covered, research much less so.
Less focus on general background (e.g., about motivation) and more focus on research about the impact of different types of feedback on motivation could strengthen the chapter.
Use third person perspective, although first person can work well for examples.
Focus questions could be more focused on the topic. 1st and 2nd focus questions probably not needed - just summarise and provide links to more indepth chapters on these topics. Focus on the sub-title.
There is too much general theoretical material (e.g., about motivation). Instead, summarise and link to further information (such as other book chapters or Wikipedia articles), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).
There is some promising material about the role of negative feedback. What about positive feedback? What about the combination of positive and negative feedback (e.g., see theory and research about the "feedback sandwich"). Ideally, expand more about how the quality of feedback impacts on motivation.
Perhaps consider how the feedback-motivation relationship is affected by related concepts such as growth (vs. fixed) mindset and failure tolerance. There are related chapters on these topics. So, the current chapter could be enriched by embedding links to related concepts. Other useful related concepts which could be incorporated include goal setting theory and cognitive dissonance.
Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained.
The chapter doesn't wander off into discussion of irrelevant theory.
Relevant theory is reasonably well explained.
Basic but sufficient coverage of relevant theory is provided.
Overall, this chapter provides a basic overview of relevant research.
Age and gender are mentioned as moderating variables, but there is little review of the research. Had a more indepth review of key research been conducted, other, more important aspects of feedback may have been identified.
Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful (e.g., a Hattie reference was suggested on the talk page, but not incorporated).
There is little in the way of critical review of research.
Some claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags).
Critical thinking could be further evidenced by: considering the strength of relationships.
When describing important research findings, include more detail about the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) and results (e.g., size of effect or relationship).
Overall, the quality of written expression is good to very good.
A conversational tone is used, which is good (makes the chapter readable), up to a point, but is probably overdone in that the chapter primarily needs to provide a cogent synthesis of the best available psychological theory and research about how feedback impacts motivation.
Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes.
Direct quotes should be embedded within sentences and paragraphs, rather than dumped holus-bolus. Even better, communicate the concept in your own words.
Layout
Sections which branch into sub-sections should include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections.
Grammar, spelling, and proofreading are excellent.
Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour).
APA style
Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159).
Direct quotes need page numbers.
Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numerals (e.g., 10).
Good use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles.
No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
Good use of image(s).
Very good use of feature box(es).
Excellent use of quiz(zes).
Promising use of case studies or examples. This could be improved by the case studies being more focused on the topic (the effect of feedback on motivation). So, for example, the soccer examples could be rewritten to illustrate a key point about feedback.
The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.
The audio is easy to follow and interesting to listen to.
The presentation makes effective use of narrated audio.
Audio communication is clear.
Consider leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
Very good intonation to enhance listener interest and engagement.
