Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Eudaimonia

From Wikiversity
Latest comment: 2 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Heading casing[edit source]

Hi U3190551. FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example:

Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory

Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:27, 22 August 2021 (UTC)Reply


Topic development feedback[edit source]

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title[edit source]

  1. Excellent

User page[edit source]

  1. Excellent - used effectively
    1. Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.
  2. Link provided to book chapter

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Very good
  2. Summarised with indirect link(s) to evidence.
  3. Add direct links to evidence where possible. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.
  4. Use a numbered list.

Headings[edit source]

  1. Excellent
  2. Well developed 2-level heading structure, with meaningful headings that directly relate to the core topic.

Key points[edit source]

  1. My main recommendation is to expand the "positive psychology" focus. In so doing, some of the other less psychological aspects can be reduced or removed. To this end, consider for example some of the articles listed in this Google Scholar search. Note how there is an emphasis here on distinguishing eudaimonic from hedonic happiness - this is worth explaining and exploring.
  2. Direct quotes need page numbers (APA style).
  3. Overview - Consider adding:
    1. a description of the problem
    2. an image
    3. an example or case study
  4. Basic development of key points for each section, with relevant citations.
  5. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  6. Conclusion (the most important section):
    1. what might the take-home, practical messages be?
    2. in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question in the sub-title?

Figure[edit source]

  1. Good
  2. Caption
    1. uses APA style.
    2. could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text.
  3. Figure(s) are cited at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. Very good
  2. For APA referencing style, check and correct:
    1. italicisation
    2. doi formatting

Resources[edit source]

  1. Very good
  2. See also
    1. Use internal links for Wikipedia articles e.g., Eudaimonia (Wikipedia)
  3. External links
    1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:56, 30 August 2021 (UTC)Reply

Comments[edit source]

It is a very interesting subject. I noticed that you tend to have (half) sentences and then points. This is useful in some instances, but I feel as though it is only half a thought (if that makes sense?)

For an example of how to make these sentences, see your overview (I would try to explain to the reader why this is important to them, get them to invest in your chapter: Why should I read this? How is this relevant to me?) and below:

  • Philosophies: Most philosophies, such as Confucianism, Taoism and Buddhism, have (elements of) something similar to eudaimonia (Cheng & Ho, 2013).

Not sure I understand where you are going or what you mean in this paragraph, but it seems incomplete:

  • Virtue ethics: The theory of intrinsic motivation is a large part of eudaimonia. Because

• self-determination theory • virtue ethics • inward goals • intrinsic motivation

Please review your conclusion as well - it is currently just a list of points. Try turning this into a paragraph and have a box underneath for key points that you can move this list into.

I would tweaked this sentence – see figure location and move the second second to the intro....

  • The term eudaimonia originated in Ancient Greece and was first proposed by Plato and Aristotle (Figure 1), two philosophers in the Classical Period of Ancient Greece (Irwin, 1985).

Review this sentence from become to achieve?

  • Eudaimonia is a complex subject and there are many theories on how to become (achieve) eudaimonic.

Add ideas together instead of small sentences:

  • Instead of: Many psychological theories have similarities to eudaimonia. The most well-known is Maslow's theory of self-actualization. Positive psychology also involves eudaimonia. Virtue ethics are also relevant.
  • Try: Many psychological theories have similarities to eudaimonia, such as positive psychology, Maslow's theory of self-actualization and virtue ethics.

(please make sure information/facts are correct first!)

Hope these points help some. Best of luck. --U3167879 (discusscontribs) 01:18, 8 October 2021 (UTC)Reply

Expanding upon what you have[edit source]

Hi, I really like what you have so far for your topic. I feel like some areas can be expanded upon to better answer your topic question. https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Veronika-Huta/publication/264932700_The_Complementary_Roles_of_Eudaimonia_and_Hedonia_and_How_They_Can_Be_Pursued_in_Practice/links/53f601070cf2888a7492252c/The-Complementary-Roles-of-Eudaimonia-and-Hedonia-and-How-They-Can-Be-Pursued-in-Practice.pdf https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007%252Fs10902-011-9249-7

Are both by Veronika Huta, and they expand more upon how to develop eudaimonia, both conciously and also how it may be instilled in us by our role models as children. Particularly the second article I feel would really benefit your article as it seems to be missing any acknowledgement that these types of thinking patterns can be instilled in us unconciously. --U3187741 (discusscontribs) 23:58, 15 October 2021 (UTC)Reply

Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter provides promising discussion of psychological theory about concepts related to eudaimonia, but is insufficient in reviewing related research.
  2. This chapter is well under the maximum word count.
  3. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits.

Overview[edit source]

  1. The Overview is well-focused, but brief.
  2. Consider including a practical example to engage reader interest.

Theory — Breadth[edit source]

  1. Overall, a reasonably good breadth of relevant theory is considered.
  2. Is eudaimonia is "theory"? I suspect it is more like a concept. Theory implies some principles that can be scientifically tested.
  3. A helpful distinction is made between hedonia and eudaimonia.
  4. Consider expanding on the link between eudaimonia and theories of happiness, flourishing, flow etc. (e.g., Seligman's PERMA model, particularly Engagement).
  5. The coverage of different cultural and philosophical perspectives on eudaimonia is interesting, adding theoretical breadth.
  6. Regarding the proposed connection between eudaimonia and self-actualisation; if eudaimonia is a process, perhaps it is more related to something like the actualising tendency (Rogers)? Even then, I suspect that it is more relevant to link to engagement, flow, etc. or what Seligman calls "the good life" (as distinct from "the pleasurable life" and "the meaningful life").
  7. It could be helpful to distinguish eudaimonia from the meaningful life. Is "raison d'etre" more about the latter?

rs or Wikipedia articles), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).

Theory — Depth[edit source]

  1. Reasonable depth is provided about the selected theory(ies).
  2. More examples could be useful to illustrate key concepts.

Research — Key findings[edit source]

  1. There is insufficient review of research. Even though research in the area is nascent, it nevertheless warrants review (e.g., https://www.nobascholar.com/chapters/18/download.pdf).

Research — Critical thinking[edit source]

  1. There is insufficient evidence of critical thinking about research.

Integration[edit source]

  1. The chapter places more emphasis on theory than research.
  2. Due to the lack of coverage of research, there in insufficient integration between theoretical concepts and research evidence.

Conclusion[edit source]

  1. The Conclusion provides a cogent summary of the chapter.
  2. However, I wasn't convinced that "eudaimonia is a complex theory". It is no more a theory than "happiness" is a theory. Instead, there may be theories about happiness.
  3. No summary of research.
  4. No take-home messages about how to develop eudaimonia.

Written expression — Style[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is good.
    2. There are some sentences which could be improved because they are a little awkward (e.g., a sentence like "The main aim behind achieving eudaimonia is intrinsic motivation." might be better as something like "A key way of enhancing eudaimonia is to foster intrinsic motivation." because "eudaimonia" doesn't have an aim per se).
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Grammar, spelling, and proofreading are very good.
  4. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., maximize vs. maximise).
  5. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. Citations are not in full APA style (7th ed.). For example:
      1. If there are three or more authors, cite the first author followed by et al., then year. For example, either:
        1. in-text, Smith et al. (2020), or
        2. in parentheses (Smith et al., 2020)
    3. One wiki-style references is used instead of APA style - be consistent
    4. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation[1].
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.
      3. Include hyperlinked dois.

Written expression — Learning features[edit source]

  1. Good use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles.
  2. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
  3. Basic use of image(s).
  4. No use of table(s).
  5. No use of feature box(es).
  6. Excellent use of quiz(zes). Loved the explanatory feedback.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~18 logged, useful, minor to moderate social contributions with direct links to evidence.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:19, 27 October 2021 (UTC)Reply

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic presentation.
  2. The presentation is under the maximum time limit.

Overview[edit source]

  1. An opening slide with the title and sub-title is presented and narrated - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Create an engaging introduction to hook audience interest.
  3. Establish a context for the topic, to help the viewer understand.
  4. Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages.

Content[edit source]

  1. Comments about the book chapter may also apply to this section.
  2. The presentation addresses the topic.
  3. The presentation makes basic use of relevant psychological theory.
  4. The presentation makes no use of relevant psychological research.
  5. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies.

Conclusion[edit source]

  1. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.

Audio[edit source]

  1. The audio is easy to follow.
  2. The presentation makes good use of narrated audio.
  3. Audio communication is clear and well paced. Excellent pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  4. Very good intonation enhances listener interest and engagement.
  5. Audio recording quality was excellent.

Video[edit source]

  1. Overall, visual display quality is good.
  2. The presentation makes good use of text and image based slides.
  3. The font size is mostly sufficiently large enough to make it easy to read.
  4. Some of the font size should be larger to make it easier to read.
  5. The amount of text presented per slide makes it easy to read and listen at the same time.
  6. The presentation is basically produced using simple tools.

Meta-data[edit source]

  1. The chapter title is used, but the sub-title (or a shortened version of it) is not used in the name of the presentation - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding.
  3. A link to the book chapter is not provided.
  4. A link from the book chapter is provided.

Licensing[edit source]

  1. Image sources and their copyright status are not provided. Either provide details about the image sources and their copyright licenses in the presentation description or remove the presentation.
  2. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 07:29, 23 November 2021 (UTC)Reply