Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Dental fear

Comment

Love this subject - everyone loves the dentist:) Your rotating head showing the amygdala is awesome! I have formatted the case study/quiz section. Hope this helps. --U3167879 (discuss • contribs) 06:13, 22 September 2021 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title Incorrect - now fixed User page Excellent - used effectively Description about self provided Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks. Link provided to book chapter Social contribution Summarised with indirect link(s) to evidence. Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Use a numbered list. Add a brief summary of each contribution. Add your signature to comments on talk/discussion pages. None summarised with link(s) to evidence. Headings Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. Promising 3-level heading structure - could benefit from further development by expanding the structure. Perhaps simplify to a 2-level structure. Key points Key points are well developed for most sections, with relevant citations. Key points are missing for sections towards the end of the chapter. Check and correct APA style for et al. formatting. Overview - Consider adding: an image an example or case study Good balance of theory and research. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Consider including more examples/case studies. Conclusion (the most important section): hasn't been developed what might the take-home, practical messages be? in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title? Figure A figure is presented. Caption should include Figure X. ... (i.e., italics and period) Caption explains how the image connects to key points being made in the main text. Caption could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text. Figure(s) are cited at least once in the main text. References Very good For APA referencing style, check and correct: italicisation Resources Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:20, 4 September 2021 (UTC)

BIS/BAS

Hi, looks like you've done some great work on here so far. My topic, The Jonah complex, talks about approach and avoidance behaviours regulated by the BIS/BAS and some of the constructs of fear discussed by Goud (2005). You might find some of it interesting and considering adding my page as a possible "see also" page on yours. Thanks, JediClass

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a very good chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Overview Lovely overview, with clear focus questions. Consider adding an image (e.g., a dental setting or tool) to help engage reader interest. Theory — Breadth Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained. The chapter doesn't wander off into discussion of irrelevant theory. Theory — Depth Appropriate depth is provided about the selected theory(ies). More examples could be useful to illustrate key concepts. Research — Key findings Relevant research is reviewed. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. Research — Critical thinking Very good critical thinking about research is evident. Critical thinking about research could be further evidenced by: considering the strength of relationships suggesting specific directions for future research Integration Discussion of theory and research is well integrated. Conclusion A good summary covers the key points, with an emphasis on practical, take-home messages. Add practical, take-home messages. Written expression — Style Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is good. "People" is often a better term than "individuals". Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned"). Instead: it is, most often, not needed at all, or use section linking. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences. Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in parentheses at the end of the sentence. The chapter could be improved by developing some of the bullet-points into full paragraph format. Layout The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections. Sections which branch into sub-sections should include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. Grammar The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Grammar-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages. Another option is to share draft work with peers and ask for their assistance. Check and correct use of that vs. who. Proofreading A little untidy (e.g., see my suggested copyedits). Replace double spaces with single spaces. APA style Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numerals (e.g., 10). Do not capitalise the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc.. Figures and tables Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics, check and correct capitalisation). Citations are not in full APA style (7th ed.). For example: Use ampersand (&) inside parentheses and "and" outside parentheses. References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of punctuation Check and correct use of italicisation Written expression — Learning features Overall, the use of learning features is good. Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. # One use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Very good use of image(s). No use of table(s). Very good use of feature box(es). Excellent use of quiz(zes). No use of case studies or examples. Social contribution ~17 logged, useful, minor/moderate/major social contributions with direct links to evidence. ~5 logged social contributions without direct links to evidence, so unable to easily verify and assess.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:44, 7 November 2021 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a very good presentation. Overview An opening slide with the title and sub-title is presented and narrated - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. A context for the topic is established. The importance of this topic is explained. Content Comments about the book chapter may also apply to this section. The presentation addresses the topic. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The presentation is well structured. The presentation makes excellent use of relevant psychological theory. The presentation makes basic use of relevant psychological research. The presentation makes excellent use of one or more examples or case studies or practical advice. The presentation provides practical, easy to understand information. Conclusion A Conclusion slide is presented with clear take-home message(s). Audio The audio is reasonably easy to follow. The presentation makes good use of narrated audio. Audio communication is reasonably well paced. Good intonation enhances listener interest and engagement. Audio recording quality was good. Mute the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio. Video Overall, visual display quality is good. The presentation makes effective use of animated slides with text and images. The amount of text on some slides should be reduced to make it easier to read. The visual communication is supplemented by images. The presentation is well produced. Meta-data The chapter title but not the sub-title is used in the name of the presentation - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. A written description of the presentation is not provided. A link to the book chapter is not provided. A link from the book chapter is provided. Licensing Image sources and their copyright status are not communicated. Probably the images are all from PowToon but this is not explicitly stated. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:15, 17 November 2021 (UTC)