Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/Reward system, motivation, and emotion

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Chapter fixes and suggestions[edit source]

User:Kiki12121 Hi, I fixed the title code on your chapter so that it would display correctly in bold, plus added some inline comments suggesting formatting, grammar, and spelling adjustments. Looks like you're on the right track with some great info in there. If you need me to clarify any of my comments feel free to contact me. --U3186080 (discusscontribs) 17:57, 28 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

  • Consider using formatting features i.e. bold, underlines, italics to emphasise and separate text.

U3187226 (discusscontribs) 10:29, 9 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for sentence casing. For example, the wikitext should be:

== Cats and mice ==

rather than

== Cats and Mice ==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:10, 20 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]


The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title[edit source]

  1. Excellent
  2. Line break added between title and sub-title

User page[edit source]

  1. Created - minimalistic
  2. About me
    1. Add heading (per Tutorial 1)
    2. Description about self provided
    3. Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.
  3. Add link to book chapter

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. None summarised with link(s) to evidence.

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Basic, 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development to limit the focus on background information and expand the focus on the target topic
  2. See earlier comment about Heading casing.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Fix the many broken links; learn how to use internal links, numbered lists, external links etc. as per Tutorial 1 - Using Wikiversity)
  2. Avoid overcapitalisation (APA style) - more info
  3. Overview - Consider adding:
    1. an image
    2. an example or case study
  4. Conclusion (the most important section):
    1. hasn't been developed
    2. what might the take-home, practical messages be?
  5. Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then focus most of the content on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title.
  6. Did you actually consult and read Thorndike (1911)? If not, don't cite it.
  7. Basic development of key points for each section, with some relevant citations.
  8. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters.
  9. Consider including more examples/case studies.

Image[edit source]

  1. Well done on adding your own image
    1. The image could be improved by cropping, to remove unnecessary empty white space. Once cropped, re-upload with the same image name and it will automatically replace/update.
    2. What do the parallel lines mean?
    3. Correct the spelling errors
  2. Caption
    1. does not use APA style.
  3. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. For APA referencing style, check and correct:
    1. capitalisation
    2. italicisation
  3. None

Resources[edit source]

  1. See Tutorial 1 for how to create and present internal and external links
  2. Use bullet points
  3. Include source in brackets after the link

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:10, 20 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Headings Suggestion[edit source]

Hey- Just some feedback regarding heading stucture. Try to avoid sections with only one heading. Aim for 0-2+ Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. --U3122220 (discusscontribs) 18:54, 15 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Chapter Edits[edit source]

Hello! I fixed some spelling errors, reformatted your page with direct focus questions, added sub headings and did some general layout maintenance. Hope it helps you out! --U3160224 (discusscontribs) 12:33, 10 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an insufficient chapter.
  2. Addressing the topic development feedback could have helped to improve this chapter.
  3. The Overview provides a useful scenario and some focus questions, but doesn't describe the problem to be investigated by the chapter or what will be covered.
  4. This chapter makes insufficient use of primary, peer-reviewed sources as citations.
  5. This chapter is well under/over the maximum word count.
  6. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. There is too much general theoretical material. Instead, summarise and link to further information (such as other book chapters or Wikipedia articles), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question). The chapter starts to address the target topic with the section titled: "How the reward system influences emotion and motivation".
  2. Did you consult Old et al. (1950)? If not, this should be cited as a secondary source.
  3. There is little evidence of an indepth reading and understanding of the topic.

Research[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter makes insufficient use of research.
  2. There is little evidence of an indepth reading and understanding of the topic.
  3. Some claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags).

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is below professional standard. UC Study Skills assistance is recommended to help improve writing skills to a professional standard.
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing.
    2. Sections which branch into sub-sections should include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Format bullet-points and numbered lists, per Tutorial 1 (e.g., for the See also section).
    2. No external links were provided.
    3. Basic use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. See example.
    4. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    5. Links to non-peer-reviewed sources should be moved to the external links section.
    6. No use of image(s).
    7. No use of table(s).
    8. Good use of feature box(es).
    9. No use of quiz(zes).
    10. Promising use of case studies or examples.
  4. Grammar
    1. The grammar for many sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags). Grammar-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages.
    2. Check and correct use of semi-colons (;) and colons (:).
    3. Use serial commas[1] - they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's a 1 min. explanatory video.
    4. Check and correct use of that vs. who.
  5. Spelling
    1. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the [spelling?] tags). Spell-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages.
  6. Proofreading
    1. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard.
    2. Remove unnecessary capitalisation.
  7. APA style
    1. Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numerals (e.g., 10).
    2. Do not capitalise the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc..
    3. Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
      2. Do not include author first name or initials.
      3. If there are three or more authors, cite the first author followed by et al., then year. For example, either:
        1. in-text, Smith et al. (2020), or
        2. in parentheses (Smith et al., 2020)
    4. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.
      3. Many of the references weren't use as citations.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. No logged social contributions.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:08, 26 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an insufficient presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Several comments about the book chapter also apply to this section.
  2. This presentation doesn't adequately address the original topic - why has the topic been changed to focus on employees? The selection of content doesn't adequately use the most relevant psychological theory and/or research to address the original topic.
  3. Add and narrate an initial title/sub-title slide, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation.
  4. Consider adding and narrating an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  5. The presentation makes irrelevant use of theory and research in relation to the original topic.
  6. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies which are relevant to the original topic.
  7. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.
  8. The Conclusion did not fit within the time limit.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation is hard to follow because the narration goes too fast - present less content, more slowly. Leave longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  2. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  3. The visual communication is supplemented by images.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. The wording and/or formatting/grammar of the title/sub-title is inconsistent between the name of the video, the opening slide, and/or the book chapter.
  2. Audio recording quality was poor (e.g., too fast).
  3. Visual display quality was engaging.
  4. Image sources and their copyright status are not provided. Either provide details about the image sources and their copyright licenses in the video description or remove the presentation.
  5. This presentation has probably violated the copyrights of image owners as images appear to have been used without permission and/or acknowledgement.
  6. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.
  7. A link to the book chapter is not provided.
  8. A written description of the presentation is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:20, 26 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]