Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/Oxytocin and social support

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for sentence casing. For example, the wikitext should be: == Cats and mice == rather than == Cats and Mice == -- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:55, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

@U3122220: Just making sure that you're aware of this feedback about heading casing. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:24, 11 October 2020 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title Good Capitalisation of the title and sub-title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents User page Excellent - used effectively Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks. Link provided to book chapter Add link to book chapter Social contribution Excellent - summarised with direct link(s) to evidence. Note that by using a hanging indent template, there is no need to manually tab references in. e. Section headings Promising 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. See earlier comment about Heading casing. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings. Key points Partial key point development Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then focus most of the content on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. Consider including more examples/case studies. Use APA style for citations. Image An image (figure) is presented. Caption uses APA style. could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text. Cite each figure at least once in the main text. References Very good For APA referencing style, check and correct: capitalisation italicisation Resources Very good

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:55, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

Linking to related oxytocin chapters

@U3122220: I suggest that you integrate/embed reference/link to each of the previous oxytocin chapters and also consider the previous social support chapters. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:40, 4 October 2020 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Theory Relevant theories are well selected, described, integrated, and explained. Research Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicating the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. Written expression Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is very good. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned"). Instead, use section linking. Use 3rd person perspective rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you")[1]. The chapter benefited from a well developed Overview and Conclusion, with clear focus question(s) and take-home messages. Reduce use of weasel words which bulk out the text, but don't enhance meaning. Layout The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections. See earlier comments about heading casing. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings. Learning features Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Basic/No use of image(s) - both Figure 1? No use of table(s). Excellent use of feature box(es). Excellent use of quiz(zes). Grammar Use serial commas[2] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's a 1 min. explanatory video. Abbreviations Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses. Spelling Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the tags). APA style Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). Figures and tables Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics, check and correct capitalisation). Citations use correct APA style. References use correct APA style. Social contribution ~5 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:53, 13 November 2020 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic presentation. Structure and content An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. Add and narrate a Title slide, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation. The presentation focuses too much on general aspects (e.g., oxytocin and stress as separate concepts) and too little on the specific relationships/connection between O and SS. The presentation makes basic use of theory. The presentation makes little/no use of research. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s). Communication The presentation makes basic use of text based slides with narrated audio. Well paced. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. Some of the font size should be larger to make it easier to read. The visual communication is supplemented by images. Production quality The video is produced using simple tools. The chapter title and sub-title are not used on the opening slide - this would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. The chapter title but not the sub-title are used in the video title - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Audio recording quality was OK. Visual display quality was basic. Image sources and their copyright status are mentioned as being from Wiki Commons, but specific links to the source of each image are not provided. A copyright license for the presentation is provided. A link to the book chapter is provided. A link from the book chapter is provided. A written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:17, 23 November 2020 (UTC)