I would like to see some information on how the bond between mother and infant is measured. Also, think you could delve further into oxytocin and its effect on emotions, and these demonstrated within the mother-infant example. U3202026 (discuss • contribs) 09:10, 30 August 2020 (UTC)
The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.
Excellent - summarised with direct link(s) to evidence.
If editing a Wikiversity page which already exists, add direct links to evidence like this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.
Overall, this is a very good chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
The main areas for potential improvement are to address the topic within the maximum word count, provide closer citation of claims, and to improve the quality of written expression by addressing grammatical problems.
Initially, there is too much general theoretical material. Instead, summarise and link to further information (such as other book chapters or Wikipedia articles), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).
Relevant theories are well selected, described, integrated, and explained.
Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
Use bullet-points and numbered lists, per Tutorial 1.
Basic use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. See example.
Minimal use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
Very good use of image(s). Some image sizes could be increased to make them easier to read.
No use of table(s).
Excellent use of feature box(es).
Excellent use of quiz(zes).
The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').
Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., vs., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses.
Remove unnecessary capitalisation.
Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159).
Figures and tables
Figure 3 was removed due to lack of copyright information.
Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics).
Provide more detailed Figure captions to help connect the figure to the text.
Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
Formatting for citations with three or more authors should be either:
in-text, Smith et al. (2020), or
in parentheses (Smith et al., 2020)
References are not in full APA style. For example:
There is probably a little too much content. Zoom out to provide a higher-level presentation at a slower pace. Focusing on the content that is most relevant to addressing the question: "What role does oxytocin play in mother-infant bonding?" (so, perhaps, a little less on oxytocin and birth itself).
The presentation is well structured, with clear focus questions.
The presentation makes excellent use of theory.
The presentation makes implicit use of research - could be more explicit.
The presentation makes basic use of one or more examples or case studies.
A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s).