Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/Oxytocin and mother-infant bonding

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Quiz[edit source]

Hi, you can put the "All of the Above." as the last answer to question 1. And also check question 2 --U3178984 (discusscontribs) 10:17, 12 October 2020 (UTC)

Potential for more in-depth information[edit source]

I would like to see some information on how the bond between mother and infant is measured. Also, think you could delve further into oxytocin and its effect on emotions, and these demonstrated within the mother-infant example. U3202026 (discusscontribs) 09:10, 30 August 2020 (UTC)

References[edit source]

Hi, I noticed that some of your references did not meet APA 7th edition requirements, have a look at this link for some extra help!! (discusscontribs) 07:47, 14 October 2020 (UTC)

Reply[edit source]

Thank you, have already found a test they use to measure mother-infant bond. Will make sure to include it in chapter. U3189449 (discusscontribs) 09:28, 30 August 2020 (UTC)

Suggestion for quizzes[edit source]

Hey ! i found these helpful flashcards that might be useful for your quizzes. I attempted them straight after reading your page and felt your page was very informative, well done ! U3177123 (discusscontribs) 21:18, 18 October 2020 (UTC)

Hi, thanks for this. I'm not too sure how they link into my page though- perhaps you've linked into the wrong page? All the best, Anubhandary (discusscontribs)

Hi, I'm not sure if this is meant for my page either... These quizzes don't seem to relate to my content. Thanks anyway! TaraMaland

Topic development feedback[edit source]

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title and sub-title[edit source]

  1. Very good
  2. Good
  3. Capitalisation of the title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents
  4. Authorship details removed - authorship is as per the page's editing history

User page[edit source]

  1. Excellent - used effectively
  2. Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.
  3. Link provided to book chapter

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Excellent - summarised with direct link(s) to evidence.
  2. If editing a Wikiversity page which already exists, add direct links to evidence like this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.
  3. Use a numbered list.

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Well developed 2-level heading structure, with meaningful headings that directly relate to the core topic.
  2. Aim for 3 to 6 top-level headings between the Overview and Conclusion, with up to a similar number of sub-headings for large sections.
  3. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Overview - Consider adding:
    1. an image
    2. an example or case study
  2. Expand theory - why/how?
  3. It is good to consider what can go right/wrong in oxytocin facilitating mother-infant bonds
  4. Key points are well developed for each section, with relevant citations.
  5. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters.
  6. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  7. Include APA style citations.
  8. Use APA style for citations (e.g., do not include author initials).

Image[edit source]

  1. Excellent
  2. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. For APA referencing style, check and correct:
    1. capitalisation
    2. italicisation
    3. doi formatting
    4. Remove "Retrieved from" (as of APA style 7th ed.)

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also
    1. Excellent
  2. External links
    1. Useful detail
    2. Start with the link - include source in brackets after link - and then any other descriptive detail

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:26, 21 September 2020 (UTC)

Heading casing[edit source]

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Hi U3189449. FYI, the Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example:

Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory

Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:51, 16 October 2020 (UTC)

Interim feedback[edit source]

@U3189449: Some suggestions from a quick review of the draft:

  1. Overall, this is looking good and coming along well. The following are relatively minor comments.
  2. FYI, I've made some minor edits
  3. Good to see the chapter considering what happens when the mother doesn't bond well with the infant - and why, particularly the role of oxytocin in these situations?
  4. Better than "in the above subsection ‘Skin to skin contact’", provide a link e.g., in the skin to skin contact section.
  5. Remember to refer to all figures at least once in the text
  6. Use 3rd person perspective (e.g,. search for instances of "you" and rewrite).
  7. APA style:
    1. Where 'apostrophes' are used for emphasis, these should be "double quote marks".
    2. Citations: (Bell, et. al., 2014) should be (Bell, et al., 2014)
  8. References - APA style 7 (see the UCLearn Discussions for more inf:
    1. Check and correct capitalisation
    2. Use italicisation
    3. Remove "Retrieved from"
    4. Provide the full doi website address as an active hyperlink

Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c

Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a very good chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
  2. The main areas for potential improvement are to address the topic within the maximum word count, provide closer citation of claims, and to improve the quality of written expression by addressing grammatical problems.
  3. This chapter is well over the maximum word count.
  4. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Initially, there is too much general theoretical material. Instead, summarise and link to further information (such as other book chapters or Wikipedia articles), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).
  2. Relevant theories are well selected, described, integrated, and explained.

Research[edit source]

  1. Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory, but more careful citation of claims is needed.
  2. Some claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags).
  3. When describing important research findings, consider indicating the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  4. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is good.
    2. Use 3rd person perspective rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you")[1].
    3. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned"). Instead, use section linking.
    4. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    5. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Use bullet-points and numbered lists, per Tutorial 1.
    2. Basic use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. See example.
    3. Minimal use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    4. Very good use of image(s). Some image sizes could be increased to make them easier to read.
    5. No use of table(s).
    6. Excellent use of feature box(es).
    7. Excellent use of quiz(zes).
  4. Grammar
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    2. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').
    3. Check and make correct use of commas.
    4. Use serial commas[2] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's a 1 min. explanatory video.
    5. Check and correct use of that vs. who.
    6. Check and correct use of affect vs. effect.
    7. Abbreviations
      1. Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., vs., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses.
  5. Spelling
    1. Remove unnecessary capitalisation.
  6. APA style
    1. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159).
    2. Figures and tables
      1. Figure 3 was removed due to lack of copyright information.
      2. Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics).
      3. Provide more detailed Figure captions to help connect the figure to the text.
    3. Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Formatting for citations with three or more authors should be either:
        1. in-text, Smith et al. (2020), or
        2. in parentheses (Smith et al., 2020)
  7. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.
      3. Include hyperlinked dois.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~17 logged, useful, social contributions - some with and some without direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:22, 15 November 2020 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.


Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a very good presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. There is probably a little too much content. Zoom out to provide a higher-level presentation at a slower pace. Focusing on the content that is most relevant to addressing the question: "What role does oxytocin play in mother-infant bonding?" (so, perhaps, a little less on oxytocin and birth itself).
  2. The presentation is well structured, with clear focus questions.
  3. The presentation makes excellent use of theory.
  4. The presentation makes implicit use of research - could be more explicit.
  5. The presentation makes basic use of one or more examples or case studies.
  6. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s).

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation is interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. The presentation makes effective use of animated slides.
  3. Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  4. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  5. Some of the font size should be larger to make it easier to read.
  6. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. The video is very well produced.
    1. The sub-title is missing in both the video title and on the opening slide - this would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Audio recording quality was excellent.
  3. Visual display quality was excellent.
  4. A copyright license for the presentation is provided in the video description but not in the meta-data.
  5. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  6. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  7. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:38, 22 November 2020 (UTC)