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Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Opioid system and human emotion

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Latest comment: 5 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

Initial feedback

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My main suggestion at this early stage is to reduce the amount of background information (a lot of this can be briefly summarised with links to more detailed info e.g., on Wikipedia) and expand on content which directly addresses the question "What role does the opioid system play in human emotion?". Also note that there is a word missing in the sub-title. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:49, 17 August 2019 (UTC)Reply

References that may help

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The first two links are of the same study, the first being a bit more simplified a quick read. https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/media/releases/negative_emotions_linked_to_higher_rates_of_opioid_use_in_sickle_cell_disease_ https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1526590017307010?via%3Dihub#bb0010

This is a reference for Plutchik's original theory of the wheel of emotions in case you need it for you work. Plutchik, R. (1980). Emotion. A psychoevolutionary synthesis. New York: Harper and Row.


Topic development feedback

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The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title

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  1. Excellent

User page

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  1. Excellent

Social contribution

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  1. Excellent

Section headings

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  1. Use default style for headings (bold and numbers have been removed)
  2. Author user page section not needed (removed) - authorship is indicated via the page history
  3. I suggest reducing the amount of content on brain structures (links can be provided to more information) and focusing more directly on the role that the OS plays in emotion.
  4. A well developed, but somewhat complex 3-level heading structure is provided. This may be somewhat off-putting for someone wanting a user-friendly overview/introduction to the topic - consider simplifying.
  5. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  6. Avoid providing too much background/generic material. Instead briefly summarise background concepts and provide wiki links to further information. Then focus most of the content on directly answering the core question posed by the sub-title of chapter.

Key points

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  1. The plan is promising but is almost at the max. word count for chapters, so there will need to be some very significant culling.
  2. There is a risk that this chapter will be overly technical and not user-friendly for an intelligence lay audience. There is also a risk that this chapter will focus on neurological structures and lack sufficient focus on the contribution of the opioid system to emotion.
  3. The Overview argues that opioids are narcotics; but the topic question is really about the endogenous opioid system. So, whilst exogenous opioids may be of some interest, this is really a side issue (e.g., maybe a feature box).
  4. Avoid overly long paragraphs.
  5. Consider revising the focus questions to focus more directly on the topic (i.e., "How does the opioid system influence emotions?"), with brief summaries and links to more info about the other questions.
  6. Check/correct grammar and spelling.
  7. The presentation of brain structures doesn't make a lot of sense because how they link to the opioid system isn't clear explained.
  8. The first relevant section after the "Overview" is "Physiology of opioid system"
  9. Explain and/or provide internal Wikipedia links on first mention of technical terms such as "μ-receptor" - write for a target audience who is unfamiliar with such terms.
  10. The planned information about emotion is very general. Summarise and link to dedicated chapters or Wikipedia articles about emotion. Instead, focus on emotions that are enabled/facilitated by the opioid system. To this end, the single most important suggested section is "Opioid system and the human emotion". Expand this and remove or reduce everything else. Key points in this section are well developed, with relevant citations.
  11. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.
  12. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  13. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end.
  1. Excellent

References

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  1. Good.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use correct capitalisation
    2. Use correct italicisation
    3. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html
    4. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources

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  1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:24, 22 September 2019 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall

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  1. Wow - this is a tour de force. Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
  2. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.
  1. Relevant theories are very well selected, described, and explained.
  1. Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory.
  2. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  1. Written expression
    1. This is a very well written chapter.
    2. Use third person perspective, rather than first person (e.g., "we") or second person (e.g., "you") perspective.
    3. The chapter benefited from a well developed Overview and Conclusion, with clear focus question(s) and take-home messages.
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter is very well structured, with major sections using sub-sections. I've converted some of the feature box content into sub-headings.
  3. Learning features
    1. Excellent, novel use of review questions.
    2. Excellent use of links to additional resources.
    3. Use in-text interwiki links, rather than external links.
    4. Very good use of images. Each Figure and Table should be cited in the main text.
    5. Good use of feature boxes and excellent use of review questions.
    6. Excellent use of case studies or examples.
  4. Grammar is very good, but see the [grammar?] tags.
  5. Spelling is excellent.
  6. Proofreading is very good.
  7. APA style
    1. Use APA style for Table captions. See example.
    2. Citations are close, but not all are in full APA style. For example:
      1. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    3. References are close but not all ar in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. See new doi format.
  1. ~10 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence, most not long before book chapters were due.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:43, 5 November 2019 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is an solid, promising presentation.
  2. This presentation makes effective use of simple tools.
  3. The presentation is over the maximum time limit - content beyond 3 mins is ignored for marking purposes. Consider removing the initial definition of emotion.
  1. Well selected content - but there is not too much because the presentation runs over time.
  2. Add and narrate an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  3. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.
  1. The presentation is interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides with narrated audio.
  3. Well paced.
  4. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  5. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images.
  1. The chapter title but not the sub-title are used in the video title - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. The chapter title and sub-title are used on the opening slide - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  3. Audio recording quality was very good but possibly an on-board microphone was used because keyboard clicks were audible. Consider using an external microphone.
  4. Visual display quality was excellent.
  5. Image sources and their copyright status are not provided. Either acknowledge the image sources and their licenses in the video description or remove the presentation.
  6. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.
  7. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  8. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  9. A brief written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:45, 18 November 2019 (UTC)Reply