Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Methamphetamine and emotion

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Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:43, 1 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]


The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title, sub-title, TOC[edit source]

User page[edit source]

  1. Basic

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. None summarised on user page

Section headings[edit source]

  1. The "Emotion" and "Meth" top-level headings aren't really needed - cover these concepts briefly within the Overview or subsequent sections, with links to dedicated Wikiversity/Wikipedia resources for more info. This will allow the bulk of the structure to be focused on addressing the core topic (the chapter's sub-title).
  2. Note that the topic is about the effects of M on emotion, not M and addiction. Although emotion and addiction are related, be careful not to miss the bigger picture question.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Well developed

Image[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. Expand figure caption to explain how it relates to one or more key points in the text

References[edit source]

  1. Good
  2. Use APA style
  3. For latest APA style recommended format for dois see http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2017/03/doi-display-guidelines-update-march-2017.html

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also
    1. Use internal links
    2. Also include links to related Wikiversity book chapters
  2. External links
    1. Use external links
    2. Include info about source/destination in brackets after the hyperlink - see example

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:43, 1 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]


Feedback[edit source]

Your topic sounds really interesting and I look forward to seeing the finished product! Just some assistance and advice in regards to the See Also and External Links sections. Instead of providing just the link, write what the website is about, for example: Methamphetamine and Emotion (Wikipedia) - and then you highlight these words, and in edit mode select the little link button (which looks like an infinity sign, right next to the Cite button) and then paste your link into the 'External link'. If it is a Wikipedia page, then you can link the title of a Wikipedia page by entering: 'w: title' into the link 'Search pages'. I hope this makes sense/helps a bit. Otherwise, best of luck for the rest of the chapter! --Abbsu3163507 (discusscontribs) 00:48, 20 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Update: I've done this for you as I don't think my explanation made much sense. Just delete the link before the linked word (as I didn't want to delete anything from your page) and edit it until your happy. I hope this is helpful --Abbsu3163507 (discusscontribs) 02:26, 21 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Suggestion for journal article[edit source]

Very interesting topic cannot wait to read the final book chapter. I have suggested this news article for you which looks at methamphetamine on emotional formation memory in humans.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4332474/pdf/pone.0117062.pdf

U3160397 (discusscontribs) 17:16pm, 21 October 2018 (UTC)


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter is not of sufficient quality to be of a professional standard.
  2. The main areas for improvement are:
    1. Being more targetted at the topic (emotional effects of meth use)
    2. Currently the chapter reads like a topic development plan, with lots of bullet points - it needs to be written up as full sentences and paragraphs. In some (but only a small number) of places, bullet-points may be appropriate.
    3. More depth is needed, particularly regarded to theory, research, and practical applications (e.g., case studies, examples, take-home messages) etc.
  3. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. The content is loosely/roughly related to the topic, but it should be more carefully selected and focused. For example, the topic is about the emotional effects of meth use - not abuse per se. This is an important distinction that seems not to have been made.
  2. Basic coverage of some relevant theory is provided.
  3. More depth could be provided, for example, about the neuropsychological effects.
  4. There is general info about emotion, but not much targetted at specific emotions (e.g., aggression). In the case of aggression, it would be ideal to provide a brief summary and then link to the existing book chapter on this topic to help embed this chapter into the broader book project. And link the aggression chapter to this chapter.

Research[edit source]

  1. Some relevant research is covered in basic detail. More depth and synthesis would be ideal. Has the best research about this topic been consulted, reviewed, and synthesised?
  2. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful.
  4. Some statements are unreferenced (see the [factual?] tags).

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. The chapter seems incomplete - part-way between a plan and a full draft. It needs to be completed to have a chance of being pass-worthy.
    2. Many of the bullet-points (Overview, Emotion, Conclusion, and so on) should have been in full paragraph format. Others should be removed altogether, to concentrate only on those directly related to the topic (emotional effects of meth).
    3. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned").
    4. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    5. Internationalise (e.g., External links): Write for an international, not just Australian audience. Australians make up only 0.32% of the world human population.
    6. Further development of the Overview and Conclusion is recommended - these are the most important sections.
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing.
    2. Consolidate the structure (e.g., separate top-level sections are not needed for Meth and History of meth; similarly the sections Meth abuse and Short-term effects should be synthesised).
    3. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. Learning features
    1. There is very little use of extra learning features.
    2. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive.
    3. Basic use of one image.
    4. No use of tables, quizzes, case studies, or examples.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading.
    1. Check and correct use of that vs. who.
    2. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard.
    3. Check and correct use of commas.
  5. APA style
  6. Expand figure caption to explain how it relates to one or more key points in the text
    1. Citations
      1. A serial comma is needed before "&" or "and" for citations involving three or more authors.
      2. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
      3. There should be no comma after "et al".
    2. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Proofreading needed.
      2. Check and correct capitalisation.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Many of the comments about the book chapter also apply to this section.
  2. Well structured - but probably not too much content is covered too fast - better to be more selective and slow down.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation makes basic use of text-based slides with narrated audio.
  2. Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  3. The amount of text could be reduced to make the visuals easier to read.
  4. The visual communication could be improved by including some relevant images.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Video recording quality was excellent.
  3. Audio recording quality was OK (a bit quiet) - review microphone set up.
  4. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.
  5. A link to the book chapter is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:15, 16 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Chapter resubmission comments[edit source]

The main noted changes were:

  1. Conversion of many bullet points into sentences and paragraphs.
  2. Expansion of many bullet points into more complete explanations.
  3. Quiz added.

Also see these additional copyedits. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:34, 15 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]