Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Body image and emotional well-being

From Wikiversity
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Comments[edit source]

Hello! I just fixed your layout, added some boxes and did some minor editing to your headings and subheadings. I have also left some suggestions for future improvements! --U3160224 (discusscontribs) 04:43, 20 August 2020 (UTC)

Heading casing[edit source]

Crystal Clear app ktip.svg
FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:54, 1 October 2018 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Autoroute icone.svg

Title, sub-title, TOC[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. Title now added to sub-title

User page[edit source]

  1. Very good

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. Links don't go directly to evidence of contributions
  3. See suggestions for how to record social contributions

Section headings[edit source]

  1. The "Definitions" and other top-level headings aren't really needed - cover these concepts briefly within the Overview or subsequent sections, with links to dedicated Wikiversity/Wikipedia resources for more info. This will allow the bulk of the structure to be focused on addressing the core topic (i.e., the chapter's sub-title).
  2. It is difficult to see how the proposed structure will represent the best available peer-reviewed psychological theory and research about the topic. The proposed sections seem somewhat tangential/to be beating around the bush. Perhaps see if you can find the top literature review on this topic and use it as a guide.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Basic development, however see comments about section headings.
  2. Consider introducing a case study or example in the Overview.
  3. Conclusion is underdeveloped - this is the most important section which will bring everything preceding together, to provide a cogent synthesis of psychological knowledge about the topic.

Image[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. Use APA style for captions
  3. Expand figure caption to explain how it relates to one or more key points in the text

References[edit source]

  1. OK
  2. Order alphabetically
  3. Use APA style

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also - Also include links to related Wikiversity book chapters
  2. External links - Not provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:54, 1 October 2018 (UTC)

Suggestion for book chapter[edit source]

Hi there. Well done on your book chapter so far, it is a very interesting topic and I cannot wait to read the finished submission. If I can offer a piece of advice, it would be to add some kind of interactive component into your chapter. This could be a quiz or even a case study, just to engage the reader that little bit further. (The preceding unsigned comment was added by BB7897 (talkcontribs) 15:11, 16 October 2018‎)

Contribution[edit source]

Hey, this is a really interesting topic! It may be useful to have reference to some theories in relation to this topic, one theory that seems relevant to this topic is Self-Discrepancy Theory. It looks at the emotional consequences of having a discrepancy between an individual's "actual self" and "ought or ideal self", such as having the perception that they should be a particular body weight but this ideal doesn't match their current actual self. There are two journal articles that might help in explaining the association between SDT and body image/emotional well being: "Self-Discrepancy Theory and Body Image" (Vartanian, 2012) (doi: 10.1016/B978-0-12-384925-0.00112-7) and "Body-Image Disturbances and Self-Discrepancy Theory: Expansion of the Body-Image Ideals Questionnaire" (Szymanski and Cash, 1995) (doi:10.1521/jscp.1995.14.2.134). I also found a journal article that may be of interest as it looks at body image across cultures, "Body mass, weight control behaviours, weight perception and emotional well being in a multiethnic sample of early adolescents" (2006) by Viner and colleagues (doi: 10.1038/sj.ijo.0803352). Good luck with your chapter! --U3143109 (discusscontribs) 20:37, 16 October 2018 (UTC)

Hi, this seems like a really interesting topic! I found this TEDx talk from Meredith Leston called Believing is seeing: a new perspective on body dysmorphia. She talks about its prevalence, societal effects, neurological origins, the role of personal beliefs, and relates it back to her personal struggle with anorexia nervosa. It might make a good external link for your chapter. Also, I noticed the book chapter link on your user page is taking people to the mobile version of Wikiversity. Cheers! --U3122470 (discusscontribs) 13:50, 17 October 2018 (UTC)

Social Contribution[edit source]

Het i really like this topic because i feel like its something a lot of people can relate to! i think it might be helpful to have a case study or an example in your overview to really paint an image for the reader before they continue. you could use an example of what it feels like to have negative body image and later do another one about what its like to have a positive body image. Joog 17 (discusscontribs) 9:50, 21 October 2018 (UTC)

Image caption[edit source]

Hi there, I fixed your image caption to be inline with the APA style (added figure 1), you can find a guide to APA style image captions here. I also added the code for where the multimedia assignment will be linked when it's finished. I hope this helps you. Good luck with the assignment! --Brittany (u3117719) (discusscontribs) 03:46, 21 October 2018 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Wikiuutiset logo typewriter.png

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter seems to be incomplete and does provide an adequate synthesis of the best available psychological theory and research about "How does body image influence one's emotional well being?".
  2. The chapter appears to be narrowly focused on a psychopathological view that the effect of body image on well-being is negative - yet evidence suggests that only something like 1 in 4 people's emotional well-being is negative impacted? What about the other 75%? Are there no impacts or positive impacts (e.g., "I like my body and this helps me to feel emotionally well"?)
  3. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. The amount of focus on social and cyberbullying is not justified by the topic (title and sub-title) or a logically developed argument. Similarly the focus on body dissatisfaction is not justified by the topic. The topic is "How does body image influence one's emotional well being?". Implied with this might be, first of all, what is body image and what is emotional well-being. Also relevant would be what is the effect of body image on emotional well-being. But then the real litmus test for a response to this topic is how does BI affect EWB.
  2. The chapter dances around, but never really directly organises and tackles, relevant theory in relation to the topic.

Research[edit source]

  1. Basic coverage of some loosely relevant research is provided, but the review and synthesis lacks focus and seems to just use some readily available, general social media / body dissatisfaction type research studies.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression is OK, but there is considerable room for improvement. For example:
    1. Some of the bullet-points should have been in full paragraph format.
    2. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    3. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    4. What are the practical, take-away messages for improvement our everyday lives?
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing.
    2. A basic 1-level structure is used; consider developing a 2-level structure.
    3. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive.
    2. Minimal use of learning features such as images, tables, quizzes or case studies.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading.
    1. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the [spelling?] tags).
    2. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    3. Check and correct use of commas.
    4. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's).
    5. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard.
  5. APA style
    1. Use APA style for Figure captions.
    2. Citations
      1. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
      2. A serial comma is needed before "&" or "and" for citations involving three or more authors.
      3. When there are three or more authors, subsequent citations should use et al. e.g., Smith, Bush and Western (2001) and thereafter cite Smith et al. (2001).
    3. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Check and correct capitalisation.

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.


Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a poor presentation.
  2. The presentation is well over the maximum time limit.
  3. The presentation misses the forest for the trees (too much detailed focused on specifics and too little engagement on overview, synthesis, examples, and practical application).

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Many of the comments about the book chapter also apply to this section.
  2. Too much verbal content.
  3. The presentation lacks structure (e.g., it lacks an Overview of the problem and what will be covered; and it finishes suddenly, without a conclusion).

Communication[edit source]

  1. Font size should be larger to make it easier to read.
  2. The narration is monotone, too fast, and too long.

fun, easy to follow, and interesting to watch and listen to.

  1. Consider leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  2. The visual communication uses basic text slides and some images.
  3. The gifs distract from the audio and text.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. The presentation is over the maximum time limit.
  2. The full chapter title and sub-title should be used in the video title - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  3. Audio and video recording quality was good.
  4. The references slide font is too small to read.
  5. Image sources and licenses are not indicated - copyright may have been violated.
  6. A copyright license is provided for the presentation.
  7. The link back to the book chapter goes to instead of

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:29, 14 November 2018 (UTC)