Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Outdoor education and emotional development

From Wikiversity
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Comments[edit source]

Hi, I think another area that would really add to the content of this topic is to consider how outdoor education is influential in emotional development across different physiological milestones and child development stages. This Wikipedia article may help provide you with some more information in regards to this. I feel this would be a good opportunity to collaborate on our book chapters. My chapter on workplace stress and motivation considers stress management techniques which I believe could be drawn from your topic considering the connection between the environment in which one belongs. If you would like to collaborate I would love for you to reach out. Many thanks, Jaimee. --U3160654 (discusscontribs) 06:35, 13 October 2019 (UTC)

Great page! Clear explanation of the topic and concepts that are being introduced. I think it would be interesting to incorporate a section on how outdoor education generates a deeper level of understanding, as these events showcase individual's 'true colours'. It also allows for people to make deeper connections with other through stressful events (dealing with heights, water and other fears) and also team building activities - strengthens communication, leadership and accomplishment. Furthermore, it generates self evaluation and opportunities to reflect on yourself as an individual. You could also incorporate some info on how outdoor education actually improves neural connections. It might be interesting to record which types of outdoor education are most effective - 5 day camps, single day camps, water sports, bush/hiking, outward bound etc. and how prevalent these activities are in Aussie schools , Hope this helps! - Emma U3175218 (discusscontribs) 00:22, 19 October 2019 (UTC)

Heading casing[edit source]

Crystal Clear app ktip.svg
FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:38, 29 August 2019 (UTC)

Topic development feedback[edit source]

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Autoroute icone.svg

Title and sub-title[edit source]

  1. Excellent

User page[edit source]

  1. Created, with description about self and link to book chapter
  2. Used effectively

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Well summarised with links to evidence

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Basic, 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development
  2. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. Avoid providing too much background information. Instead, briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then the focus of most of the content can be on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title (i.e., the most important section to develop is "Emotional development and outdoor education")

Key points[edit source]

  1. Partial development
  2. Overview - Consider adding focus questions
  3. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.
  4. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  5. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end.

Image[edit source]

  1. Provided, with an APA style caption
  2. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. Good.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use correct italicisation
    2. Use the new recommended format for dois -
    3. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also
    1. Most of the links labelled as Wikipedia weren't pointing there; fixed now
  2. External links
    1. See tutorial 1 for how to rename links so that they are more user friendly

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:57, 26 September 2019 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Wikiuutiset logo typewriter.png

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient chapter.
  2. The chapter could benefit from further development of the Overview and Conclusion - it should be possible to only read these sections and get a good sense of why the topic is important and what is known/recommended.
  3. The chapter could be improved be addressing more of the earlier suggestions on this talk page.
  4. This chapter is well under the maximum word count.
  5. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Overall, this chapter makes basic use of theory.
  2. This chapter initially sets up an unnecessary incompatibility between digital screens and outdoor education. Whilst some outdoor education programs avoid using screens, others embrace them (e.g., for navigation, learning about the outdoors, taking photos/videos etc.). So, be careful not to overdo the screens vs. outdoors narrative. What is the theory that underlies this narrative?
  3. There is too much general theoretical material. Instead, summarise and link to further information, to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).
  4. Be careful not to exaggerate. For example, I don't think OE is a dominant approach to emotional development: "Outdoor education is a dominant approach when aiming to improve emotional development."
  5. How might OE affect emotionality? What are the mechanisms? Being outdoors/not on the screen is mentioned, as is being in a group, but what other factors may play a role (e.g., social learning, challenging activities, developing coping strategies)?

Research[edit source]

  1. Some relevant research is reviewed and discussed, but coverage is limited.
  2. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is sufficient.
    2. Use abbreviations sparingly. Do not use abbreviations for minor terms that aren't used very much in the chapter.
    3. Internationalise: Write for an international, not just a domestic audience. Australians make up only 0.32% of the world human population (e.g,. the External links are country specific).
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter uses a basic, 2-level structure. However, the 2nd level focuses on background emotional development theory rather than the relationship between OE and emotional development.
  3. Learning features
    1. Limited use of interwiki links and no embedded links to related book chapters.
    2. Embedding interwiki links links to related book chapters (e.g., about emotional intelligence and outdoor education) would help to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    3. Basic use of one image. No images directly related to the topic.
    4. No use of tables.
    5. Basic use of feature boxes.
    6. Basic use of quizzes.
    7. The quiz questions could be more effective as learning prompts by being embedded as single questions within each corresponding section rather than being presented as a set of questions at the end.
    8. Basic use of case studies or examples.
  4. Grammar
    1. Use serial commas[1] - it is part of APA style.
    2. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's).
    3. Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses.
    4. Check and correct use of affect vs. effect.
  5. Spelling
    1. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the [spelling?] tags).
  6. Proofreading
    1. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard.
  7. APA style
    1. Refer to each Table and each Figure at least once within the main text.
    2. Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. A serial comma is needed before "&" or "and" for citations involving three or more authors.
      2. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    3. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.
      3. See new doi format.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~5 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.


Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an good presentation.
  2. This presentation makes effective use of simple tools.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Well selected content - not too much or too little.
  2. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation makes good use of text and image based slides with narrated audio.
  2. Well paced.
  3. Some of the font size should be larger to make it easier to read.
  4. The visual communication is supplemented by images.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Include the sub-title in both the video title and on the opening slide to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Audio recording quality was OK - sounds a bit tinny perhaps because an on-board microphone was used in a relatively empty room. Consider using an external microphone for better sound recording quality.
  3. Visual display quality was reasonably good.
  4. Image sources and their copyright status are not provided. Copyright may have been violated. If so, delete the presentation or re-record/acknowledge appropriately.
  5. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.
  6. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  7. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  8. A brief written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:13, 18 November 2019 (UTC)

Hello! I edited your book chapter with a few suggestions from the marking criteria comments. --U3160224 (discusscontribs) 09:58, 9 October 2020 (UTC)