Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Anger evolution

From Wikiversity
Jump to navigation Jump to search


The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title[edit source]

  1. Excellent

User page[edit source]

  1. Created

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. None summarised with links to evidence

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Basic, 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development e.g., to reduce the number of top-level headings increase the number of subsequent-level headings.
  2. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. Consider more interesting headings than "relevant theories"

Key points[edit source]

  1. Key points are well developed for each section, with relevant citations.
  2. Avoid using the textbook - it is a secondary, not a primary source.
  3. Good coverage of theory.
  4. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.
  5. Consider including more examples/case studies.

Image[edit source]

  1. Provided, with an APA style caption
  2. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References[edit source]

  1. Good.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use correct capitalisation
    2. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources[edit source]

  1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:14, 26 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Suggestion[edit source]

Have a read of Robins and Novaco (1999) on systems conceptualisation and treatment of anger. Page 327, the researchers talk about how interrelatedness of system components provide positive or negative feedback among interdependent structures, which could either amplify or counteract anger processes. They also discuss some assumptions of anger and provide some clear examples. --U3158296 (discusscontribs) 07:13, 12 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Consider introducing more information into your overview, as expanding this can provide clarification towards the aims and target of your textbook chapter. Providing a case study in this section reflecting the experience of a person anger management difficulties could be beneficial. Otherwise, your work thus far appears to be well-developed, and the information provided is interesting to the viewer! Good work and good luck! --Emilymking (discusscontribs) 23:23, 15 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Hi! I like what you have done with the topic so far! I found an interesting lecture about the evolution of anger that you might want to add to your external links. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R515sx-gVwY Hope this helps! U3178428 (discusscontribs) 11:28, 20 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
  2. Overview needs development (introduce the topic). The case study and focus questions are excellent.
  3. Excellent Conclusion.
  4. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained.
  2. The Reeve (2018) and Burton, Westen, and Kowalski (2015) textbooks are overused as citations - instead, utilise primary, peer-reviewed sources.
  3. Did you directly consult James (1884)? If not, this should be a secondary citation.

Research[edit source]

  1. Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory.
  2. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    2. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned").


    1. Overall, the chapter is very well written.
    2. The chapter benefited from a well developed Overview and Conclusion, with clear focus question(s) and take-home messages.
    3. The chapter would benefit from a more developed Overview and Conclusion, with clearer focus question(s) (Overview) and take-home self-help message for each focus question (Conclusion).
    4. Internationalise: Write for an international, not just a domestic audience. Australians make up only 0.32% of the world human population.
    5. Obtaining (earlier) comments on a chapter plan and/or chapter draft could have helped to improve the chapter.
    6. Addressing the topic development feedback could have helped to improve this chapter.
  1. Layout
    1. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  2. Learning features
    1. Excellent use of interwiki links and embedded links to related book chapters.
    2. Good use of images.
    3. No use of tables.
    4. Good use of feature boxes.
    5. Good use of quizzes.
    6. The quiz questions could be more effective as learning prompts by being embedded as single questions within each corresponding section rather than being presented as a set of questions at the end.
    7. Very good use of case studies or examples.
  3. Grammar
    1. Use serial commas[1] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists.
    2. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's).
  4. APA style
    1. Refer to each Table and each Figure at least once within the main text.
    2. Citations are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. When there are three or more authors, subsequent citations should use et al. e.g., Smith, Bush and Western (2001) and thereafter cite Smith et al. (2001).
      2. In-text citations should be in alphabetical order.
    3. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and correct use of italicisation.

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. ~5 logged, minor, social contributions with direct links to evidence
  2. APA style - numbers 10 and over should be expressed in numerals - needs fixed[2]

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:41, 6 November 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a reasonably good presentation.
  2. This presentation makes use of powtoon animation tools.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Reasonably well selected content, although the presentation takes until ~02:00 to directly address the topic.
  2. The presentation is well structured.
  3. Add and narrate an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer (and the presenter!) about what will be covered.
  4. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation is interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. Well paced.
  3. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  4. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Communicate the chapter title and sub-title in both the video title and on the opening slide this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Audio recording quality was very good except for the distracting music.
  3. Mute the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio.
  4. Video recording quality was excellent/very good/good/basic.
  5. Image sources are acknowledged.
  6. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  7. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  8. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  9. A brief written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:29, 17 November 2019 (UTC)[reply]