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Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Motivation to leave domestic abuse relationships

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Latest comment: 6 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

feedback from Louise

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I really enjoyed reading your chapter. I think you have explained and applied the relevant theories very clearly. The case studies really helped to make the topic relevant to readers. I think sometimes people think domestic abuse is something that happens to other people. I think your chapter has real value because it illustrates how easily it can happen to anyone and that some people may be experiencing it even when they do not think they are. I have heard a lot of people ask, "why don't they just leave?". Your chapter does a great job of explaining why. --Louise Wheeler (discusscontribs) 04:42, 18 October 2018 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:29, 1 October 2018 (UTC)Reply

Suggestion

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Hi there, I'm loving your chapter so far! Its very closely related to my own which discusses what motivates people to kill members of their family, including a whole section on domestic violence and intimate partner homicide if you want to check it out. I also used this TED talk for my chapter as an external link, I think its also relevant to your chapter if you want to include it https://www.ted.com/talks/leslie_morgan_steiner_why_domestic_violence_victims_don_t_leave good luck :) --U3160212 (discusscontribs) 01:20, 10 October 2018 (UTC) Hi, you have chosen very important topic. You have very good information about the topic. I just would like to suggestion to you a link it may help you with your topic here is the link https://www.whiteribbon.org.au/understand-domestic-violence/facts-violence-women/domestic-violence-statistics/ Gamze102 (discusscontribs) 10:25, 28 October 2018 (UTC)Reply


Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title, sub-title, TOC

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  1. Excellent

User page

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  1. Excellent

Social contribution

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  1. Excellent
  2. Sign contributions to talk pages by adding ~~~~ at the end of your comment

Section headings

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  1. Excellent 2-level structure - not too little or not too much - and focused on the topic

Key points

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  1. Excellent
  1. Very good
  2. Use image caption to connect back to one or more key points being made in the text

References

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  1. Excellent
  2. Use APA style

Resources

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  1. Excellent - Include info about source/destination in brackets after the hyperlink - see example

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:29, 1 October 2018 (UTC)Reply

Read through

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Hey dude, thanks so much for the feedback on my chapter! I absolutely love your chapter! you've done such an amazing job, I think you've connected the theories and research together really nicely! The only think I altered about your chapter was a sentence in the overview section, rather than saying "Clearly, while this is an issue that affects both men and women, it is a particularly worrying problem for women." I've changed it to say "Clearly, while this is an issue that affects both sexes, it is a particularly worrying problem for women." I feel that this flows a little better and avoids repetition! But seriously, other than that I think you've nailed it! good luck with exams and other assessments U3096514 (discusscontribs) 02:19, 21 October 2018 (UTC) U3096514Reply


Chapter review and feedback

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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world problem.
  2. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.
  1. Relevant theories are well selected, described, critiqued, and explained.
  1. Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory.
  1. Written expression
    1. This chapter is particularly well structured and written. The rest of the comments in this section are relatively minor.
    2. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
  2. Layout
    1. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
    2. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Interwiki links are well used.
    2. Excellent use of images. Creating your own images was particular impressive. Note that the yellow background in Figure 5 makes the white text difficult to read.
    3. Excellent use of quizzes and case study examples.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading.
    1. Use serial commas.
  5. APA style
    1. Refer to each Figure at least once within the main text.
    2. References use correct APA style.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a very competent, assured presentation that makes effective use of simple tools.
  1. Well selected and structured content - not too much or too little.
  2. The presentation is well structured (Title, Overview, Body, Conclusion).
  1. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides with narrated audio.
  2. Excellent pacing, including pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  3. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read in the time provided.
  4. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images and/or diagrams.
  1. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Video recording quality was excellent.
  3. Audio recording quality is OK - at times it is a little crackly and it sounds like there is drill somewhere in the background.
  4. Audio recording quality was a bit quiet - review microphone set up.
  5. Consider muting the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio.
  6. Images source - direct link not provided.
  7. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  8. A link to and from the book chapter is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:15, 16 November 2018 (UTC)Reply