Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Elder abuse impacts on emotion

From Wikiversity
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Comments[edit]

Hi Emerald, Your chapter seems to have some good indepth info, but was thinking maybe a definition of 'elder' would be useful, eg what age or stage of life/ability makes someone considered an elder, and if this differs across cultures (for more cross-cultural as suggested by Zoe)? I also thought that maybe adding some info about whether elder abuse tends to get more significant/change form over time/as they age, or as the elder deteriorates in ability could be interesting. Hope that might be helpful. Good luck! Cheers, Dot--Foley.d (discusscontribs) 00:35, 26 September 2018 (UTC)

Hey Emeraldcahill94, Loving how your book chapter is coming along. I'd be interested to see if there are any cross cultural differences in terms of the emotional impacts of Elder Abuse. When I typed "Cross cultural elder abuse" into the UC Library database loads of articles came up. Another interesting point might be to look into trans-generational trauma and how it relates to elder abuse. Can't wait to read your chapter when its done :) kind regards, Zoe

Suggestions[edit]

Hi there, this is a very interesting subject, it looks like you have a good understanding of the topic. My first suggestion would be to swap the figure captions as the first figure says Figure 2, and the second one says Figure 1. I think if it were possible, a few more images would break up the long paragraphs of text, or maybe try including some colourful textboxes to enhance the page. The last thing I've noticed is the reference list is not quite APA, apologies if that's something you're yet to change, but I thought I would point it out! Great work and good luck :) --U3160212 (discusscontribs) 04:59, 8 October 2018 (UTC)


Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via Canvas. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Autoroute icone.svg

Title, sub-title, TOC[edit]

User page[edit]

  1. OK
  2. Chapter was named - have added a link

Social contribution[edit]

  1. Sufficient, but limited summary about what was contributed and no link provided :(
  2. See suggestions for how to present summary and link: Motivation and emotion/Assessment/Chapter#Making and summarising social contributions

Section headings[edit]

  1. No need for a section on "What is emotion?" - this can be covered briefly in the Overview with link(s) to relevant other Wikiversity and/or Wikipedia resources.
  2. Sufficient but minimal - need to develop and unpack "What are the emotional aspects and implications of elder abuse?"
  3. If covering motivations for elderly abuse, ensure to connect to the topic, which is the former question (sub-title)

Key points[edit]

  1. Minimal but sufficient - 2 dot points addressing the key topic

Image[edit]

  1. Minimal but sufficient.
  2. Explain how this images relates to the chapter topic.

References[edit]

  1. Minimal but sufficient.
  2. Hanging indent has now been added
  3. Use APA style

Resources[edit]

  1. Minimal but sufficient.
  2. See also - Provide more topic-specific/tailored links to related chapters, articles etc.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:56, 22 September 2018 (UTC)

minor suggestion[edit]

in the theories section, it is great now the many theories are laid out from different aspects. as theories are quite complex and require considerable depth, i would recommend choosing 2 or 3 theories and expanding.


Chapter review and feedback[edit]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Wikiuutiset logo typewriter.png

Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this is a promising chapter in terms of theory and research, but is let down somewhat by the quality of written expression which is not of a satisfactory professional standard.
  2. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit]

  1. The table (labelled as Figure 4. List of some of the more popular elder abuse theories) is excellent and easily the best theoretical material within the chapter. Expansion of at least some of these theories, with citations and examples, would be ideal.
  2. Use of one or more case studies could help to illustrate the issues and bring the topic to life.
  3. Theories are briefly mentioned, but there is a lack of indepth description.

Research[edit]

  1. Several interesting, relevant studies are discussed.
  2. The recommendations to use more closed-ended, quantitative survey research methods with an elderly, abused target population are highly problematic. Such an approach is unlikely to be well understood or trusted by the target group and unlikely to lead to useful data.

Written expression[edit]

  1. Written expression
    1. Written expression quality is basic and sufficient, but not really of professional standard. For example, there is awkward, repetitive expression such as "were reported as the most reported". The chapter could benefit from additional drafting and perhaps assistance with copyediting. Greater engagement in peer reviewing could have been particularly helpful.
    2. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    3. The chapter benefited from a reasonably well developed Overview and Conclusion.
    4. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned").
  2. Layout
    1. Avoid having sections with only one sub-section.
    2. Basic use of images. Number figures in order from 1 onwards. Provide captions that connect the image to key points being covered in the text.
    3. Basic use of tables - add APA style table captions and provide headers for all columns.
    4. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. Learning features
    1. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive.
    2. No use of quizzes.
    3. No use of case studies.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading.
    1. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the [spelling?] tags).
    2. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    3. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard.
    4. Use serial commas.
    5. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour).
    6. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's).
  5. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. Citations
      1. A comma is needed before "&" for citations involving three or more authors.
      2. A full stop is needed after et al.
      3. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    3. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Check and correct capitalisation.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Multimedia.png

Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.

Structure and content[edit]

  1. Many of the comments about the book chapter also apply to this section.
  2. Well selected and structured content.
  3. Some examples could help to bring the topic to life.
  4. The presentation is well structured (Title, Overview, Body, Conclusion).
  5. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.

Communication[edit]

  1. The presentation makes basic use of narrated text with narrated audio.
  2. Very basic text-based visuals - more could be added.
  3. Audio script is well-paced and reasonably well articulated.

Production quality[edit]

  1. Full chapter title and sub-title are presented on the opening slide.
  2. Consider adding a more detailed description in the video description.
  3. Consider adding a link to the book chapter in the video description.
  4. Audio recording quality was mediocre (some scratchy distortion) - review microphone set up.
  5. Add acknowledgement of image sources and software used to create presentation.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:00, 12 November 2018 (UTC)