Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Ego depletion and motivation

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Heading casing[edit]

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:15, 20 August 2018 (UTC)


Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via Canvas. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title, sub-title, TOC[edit]

  1. Full title and sub-title with correct casing wasn't provided; has now been added.

User page[edit]

  1. Good

Social contribution[edit]

  1. Excellent

Section headings[edit]

  1. See earlier comments about heading casing
  2. The topic sub-title suggests a potential three top-level heading structure - perhaps consider using it to help organise the chapter, and then perhaps the existing heading structure can be reorganised within those three broad questions

Key points[edit]

  1. Overview and Conclusion are the most important sections - but content development is lacking - expand
  2. Otherwise, well developed

Image[edit]

  1. Wasn't working - image display fixed

References[edit]

  1. Good
  2. Use APA style

Resources[edit]

  1. See also - good
  2. External links - Include info about source/destination in brackets after the hyperlink - see example

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:29, 30 September 2018 (UTC)

Comment[edit]

A starter reference (under the References heading) and chapter template have been added to the book page.--GabiK (discusscontribs) 14:00, 2 September 2018 (UTC)

Hi there, Your image is too small to read and i tried to adjust the size but I think it may have been uploaded incorrectly. --U3092381 (discusscontribs) 07:54, 2 September 2018 (UTC)

Hi, I have added an internal wiki link for you under self-determination theory. I found the link had helpful information on the theory as well as adding links to your book chapter.--GabiK (discusscontribs) 03:13, 23 September 2018 (UTC)

hi there! i think your chapter is really interesting however i feel as though some images could really enhance this book chapter! your theories and content is really interesting so it just may make it more visually appealing to have some pictures for the reader. Joog 17 (discusscontribs) 1:30, 21 October 2018 (UTC)

Hi, content wise you've done well on the aspects of this chapter that you've completed. I agree with Joog that pictures would improve the visual appeal of the page. I also think that adding other interactive features like quizzes, boxes and hyperlinks would benefit the page. Good luck. - U3144461 16:33, 21st October 2018.

Hi there, there are no images in the chapter, some use of images will be helpful to create interest for the readers. Best of luck. --(UTC)--Reet josan (discusscontribs) 03:30, 21 October 2018 (UTC)'Reet josan


Chapter review and feedback[edit]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this provides reasonable coverage of relevant theory and research, but seems to struggle to express the content in a way that embraces the possibilities of this online, interactive, self-help book project.
  2. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.

Theory[edit]

  1. The main concept is well explained, however there is less info about how it can be managed.
  2. More examples would be helpful.
  3. More tips and take-home messaged would be helpful.
  4. This chapter seems to make out some people are depleted and some aren't (a dispositional view) rather than explaining that everyone gets ego-depleted and that their performance is negatively in this state (i.e., state vs. trait). This is an important, if subtle, distinction.

Research[edit]

  1. Relevant research is described. To improve, present a synthesis of findings, rather than summaries of individual studies.
  2. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit]

  1. Written expression
    1. This is a somewhat long, tediously written chapter.
    2. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    3. The chapter could benefit from a better developed Overview and Conclusion, with clear focus question(s) and take-home messages.
    4. Paying more attention to earlier comments could have helped to improve the chapter.
    5. Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in brackets at the end of the sentence.
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing.
    2. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
    3. Consider adding focus questions to the Overview.
  3. Learning features
    1. No notable use of any additional learning features.
    2. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive.
    3. No use of images.
    4. No use of tables.
    5. No use of quizzes.
    6. No use of case studies or examples.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading.
    1. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's).
    2. Check and correct use of commas (need to be used more often).
    3. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    4. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the [spelling?] tags).
    5. Use serial commas.
  5. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
    1. Check and correct capitalisation.
    2. Check and correct italicisation.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

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Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this is a low quality presentation.

Structure and content[edit]

  1. Overall, too much detailed content, too fast - be more selective. Focus more on addressing the focus questions (in the sub-title - e.g., one third of the presentation on each question). For a brief presentation, focus on the big picture and do that well rather than racing through too much detail.
  2. Add and narrate a Title slide, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation.
  3. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  4. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.

Communication[edit]

  1. Basic, text-based and narrated audio presentation.
  2. Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.

Production quality[edit]

  1. The presentation is over the maximum time limit.
  2. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  3. Audio recording quality is poor.
  4. Images sources are not acknowledged.
  5. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  6. A link to and from the book chapter is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:05, 17 November 2018 (UTC)