Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Betrayal and emotion

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Hi there, I think this is a great topic I look forward to seeing the progression of this page! Although I would recommend using the chapter template that James has provided, it is described in tutorial 1 how to find and use it. I have also found this article which may be of use to you, it discusses betrayal in close relationships and some of the emotions related to that. good luck on your page :) --U3160212 (discusscontribs) 04:14, 1 September 2018 (UTC)

Hi, this is a new feedback. I liked how you discussed the different types of betrayal and how you also included the individual differences in regards to people's emotions. However, it would have been more helpful if you expanded on the The Community Resiliency Model and other models related to this topic. Overall, this was really interesting to read! --U3160221 (discusscontribs) 11:19, 1 September 2019 (UTC)

--- --U3160221 (discusscontribs) 11:41, 18 October 2019 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via Canvas. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title, sub-title, TOC[edit]

  1. Title was missing - now added

User page[edit]

  1. Good

Social contribution[edit]

  1. Link doesn't go to direct evidence of contribution
  2. See suggestions for how to record social contributions

Section headings[edit]

  1. Sufficient

Key points[edit]

  1. Use the best available peer-reviewed psychological science sources rather than dictionaries
  2. Limited development, particular for Overview and Conclusion


  1. Looks like the images got removed - probably for not having appropriate copyright licensing allowing for re-use.
  2. Try using already uploaded images from Wiki commons


  1. OK
  2. Use APA style
  3. For latest APA style recommended format for dois see


  1. See also - Use internal links
  2. External links - None provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:58, 30 September 2018 (UTC)

Article, suggested headings, references and see also section[edit]


Good progression on your book chapter so far! I have found a relevant article that you could use:

Finkel, E. J., Rusbult, C. E., Kumashiro, M., & Hannon, P. A. (2002). Dealing with betrayal in close relationships: does commitment promote forgiveness? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 82, 956–974. Doi: 10.1037//0022-3514.82.6.956

This article has some great research mentioned in the 'Norm Violations and the Experience of Betrayal' section, which really relates to your book chapter. They discuss how victims and perpetrators both experience particular emotions after betrayal, some similar, some different. Perhaps you could look at having the headings: 'Emotions of victims' and 'Emotions of perpetrators'. This may give your book chapter some more depth - by also recognising the emotions experienced by perpetrators of betrayal.

I also added the wikipedia page 'Betrayal' onto your 'see also' section, fixed your reference list (made the journal names and volumes italicised, uncapitalised article titles). You also don't need the issue numbers there but I left them incase you wanted to keep them. If you need any further help with APA 6th edition referencing this is what I often use:

I hope this helps! Good luck!

--Ju3141393 (discusscontribs) 06:29, 20 October 2018 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback[edit]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient chapter.
  2. Consider adding "focus questions" to the Overview to help sharpen/discipline the chapter.
  3. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.


  1. Overall, this chapter makes basic use of theory.
  2. There is too much general theoretical material (e.g., about emotion). Instead, summarise and link to further information, to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).
  3. Much more could be said about Betrayal Trauma Theory - or other theoretical perspectives


  1. Overall, this chapter provides a basic overview of relevant research.
  2. Several statements are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags).
  3. When describing important research findings, include more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  4. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful.

Written expression[edit]

  1. Written expression
    1. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned").
    2. Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses.
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive.
    2. Embedding interwiki links links to other book chapters would help to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    3. Basic use of images, quizzes, and case studies or examples.
    4. No use of tables.
  4. Grammar
    1. Check and make correct use of commas.
    2. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
  5. Proofreading
    1. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard.
  6. APA style
    1. Refer to each Table and each Figure at least once within the main text.
    2. Use APA style for Figure captions - more description is needed. See example.
    3. Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numbers (e.g., 10).
    4. Citations are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Incorrect placement of full-stop where citations are at the end of sentences.
      2. In-text citations should be in alphabetical order.
      3. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
      4. A serial comma is needed before "&" or "and" for citations involving three or more authors.
    5. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Check and make correct use of capitalisation.
      2. Check and make correct use of italicisation.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:32, 2 December 2018 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.



  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.
  2. The presentation is over the maximum time limit, thus the Conclusion was ignored for marking purposes.

Structure and content[edit]

  1. Well structured (but Conclusion was outside of max. time limit).
  2. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  3. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.


  1. The presentation makes basic use of text based slides with narrated audio.
  2. Well paced, but somewhat monotone.
  3. The visual communication could be improved by including some relevant images.

Production quality[edit]

  1. Audio recording volume varies somewhat between slides.
  2. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  3. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  4. A link to and from the book chapter is provided.
  5. A written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:40, 2 December 2018 (UTC)