Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Temperature and mood

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Hi May EJ20! If you're wanting to start on your page but still haven't been to the tutorial you can check out the one on Moodle. James' instructions to create a table of contents begin around 1:06.40

Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:21, 1 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]


Topic development review and feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks will be available later via Moodle. Keep an eye on Announcements. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title, sub-title, TOC[edit source]

  1. Excellent

User page[edit source]

  1. Created
  2. Used effectively

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Contributions sound good but links do not go to direct evidence (requires the user to go hunting). The best links go to direct evidence of the contributions made. View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click compare, and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see the book chapter author guidelines.
  2. User a numbered list

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Heading casing has been corrected.
  2. Well-developed 2-level heading structure that is clearly related to the topic, shows knowledge of the topic, and embraces the interactive book theme
  3. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Well developed for most sections, including some citations
  2. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles, but do not hyperlink headings.
  3. Excellent use of distributed quiz questions
  4. Maybe also briefly mention/consider influence of other environmental variables such as wind, sound etc.

Image[edit source]

  1. One image embedded - for the caption - is the mood perfect for the weather - or is the weather perfect for enhancing mood?
  2. Possibly use right-alignment to allow text flow around image

References[edit source]

  1. Good.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use correct italicisation
    2. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html
    3. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources[edit source]

  1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:44, 16 October 2017 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a reasonable good chapter. The main areas for improvement include developing greater clarity about the research findings, attention to the quality of written expression, especially grammar, and abbreviating to fit within the word count.
  2. For additional feedback, see these copyedits.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Theory was reasonably well described and explained, but the causal mechanisms of the relationship between temperature and mood could have been emphasised more clearly in the Conclusion.

Research[edit source]

  1. Several useful studies are mentioned.
  2. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful.
  4. Some statements were unreferenced - see the [factual?] tags

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression was OK.
    1. Avoid one sentence paragraphs.
    2. The Conclusion needed further development.
  2. Learning features
    1. Adding more interwiki links would make the text more interactive.
  3. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved - see the [grammar?] tags
  4. APA style
    1. In-text citations should be in alphabetical order
    2. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    3. Table 1 - check and correct capitalisation of caption and in column 1
    4. Use APA style for Figure captions
    5. When there are three or more authors, subsequent citations should use et al. e.g., Smith, Bush and Western (2001) and thereafter cite Smith et al. (2001).
    6. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    7. Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numbers (e.g., 10)
    8. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Check and correct capitalisation
      2. See new doi format


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. The opening example of someone feeling cold physically being cold emotionally is problematic. What theory or evidence is this based on? The notion of homeostasis would be more relevant - i.e., the most positive mood is likely to arise from an optimal environmental temperature.
  2. Whilst the effect of higher temperatures on conflict, is interesting, it doesn't directly address the topic of what is the effect of temperature on mood.
  3. Perhaps also consider gender differences in the effect of temperature on mood.
  4. Overall, well selected and structured content - not too much or too little.
  5. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  6. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation is well narrated, with interesting accompanying text and animations.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Use the full chapter title and sub-title in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Also check and correct capitalisation of the title.
  2. Audio and video recording quality is very good.
  3. Image sources are not acknowledged - copyright may have been violated.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:36, 28 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]