Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Separation anxiety in children

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Minor edit[edit source]

Hi Emma, I made a minor edit to the formatting of your reference list to include a hanging indent. Your chapter is really well set out and clear to follow! Well done and good luck. Karly --U3117418 (discusscontribs) 23:04, 22 October 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Your page[edit source]

I really love the design of your page, just wondering how you were able to get the text boxes? and I really like who well set out everything is on your page, very easy to follow!--U3136850 (discusscontribs) 04:01, 13 October 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Topic development - Feedback[edit source]

On right track, but provide some information about what is planned for each section. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:28, 21 August 2017 (UTC)[reply]

More feedback[edit source]

Hi U3117399,

I really like your topic development. I think it is the most developed chapter i've seen so far. I recently covered this topic in a different class and was wondering if you've thought of including Harlow's Attachment Study? There is a great video demonstrating dependency using monkeys. The link is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OrNBEhzjg8I just incase you were interested :). -- --Eadams1994 (discusscontribs) 05:15, 1 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]


Topic development review and feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks will be available later via Moodle. Keep an eye on Announcements. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title, sub-title, TOC[edit source]

User page[edit source]

  1. Created
  2. Used effectively

Social contribution[edit source]

  1. Excellent summaries and links

Section headings[edit source]

  1. Excellent
  2. Maybe drop the DSM-5 from the heading - we don't really care about the DSM-5 criteria per se (although it is probably the most commonly used and is therefore worth citing), but remember that there are other taxonomic/criteria approaches. And also note that this is assuming a psychopathological perspective - what about separation anxiety which doesn't reach the threshold for diagnosis as a disorder? Disorder isn't in the title, so just be wary of adopting an overly psychopathological approach. The approach of the next two sections is more broad, so perhaps either integrate the diagnostic criteria into these sections or move it below theses sections.
  3. Otherwise looks to be very well structured.

Key points[edit source]

  1. Mark-up - In the case study, use the Wikiversity style bullet-points (rather than cut and pasted bullet points)
  2. Consider integrating the case study more closely into other sections, to help provide examples

Image[edit source]

  1. Effectively used
  2. Consider increasing size
  3. Consider expanding the detail in the captions to help illustrate the key point being made in the corresponding section

References[edit source]

  1. Very good
  2. Check and correct capitalisation
  3. Italicise volumber number
  4. Check and correct the dois e.g., they shouldn't include canberra.edu.au - dx.doi.org.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au

Resources[edit source]

  1. See also
    1. For wikipedia links, the short-cut w: can be used instead of wikipedia: (both work)
  2. External links
    1. Write for an international rather than Australian audience (so consider what are the best links)
  3. Categories
    1. Retain the category links at the bottom

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:51, 8 October 2017 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback[edit source]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a very good chapter - it is well structured, addresses the target topic, and makes good use of the wiki environment. The main areas for improvement are the quality of proofreading.
  2. Note that the title of this chapter appears to have deviated from the original topic listed in the book table of contents; therefore, the chapter was moved and the title/sub-title to more accurately reflect what has been written about.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Theories were well described and explained, with examples.

Research[edit source]

  1. Research is well described and integrated.
  2. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Some statements were unreferenced - see the [factual?] tags

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. In general, the chapter is well written.
    2. Sections with sub-sections should include introductory content prior to the first sub-section
    3. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    4. Abbreviations such as i.e., should only be used within parantheses
    5. The Overview and Conclusion are well developed.
  2. Learning features
    1. Good use of interwiki links.
    2. Good use of Figures, Tables, and Quizzes.
  3. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved - see the [grammar?] tags
    2. Use Australian spelling e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise
  4. APA style
    1. Commas are needed before ampersands for citations involving three or more authors
    2. In-text citations should be in alphabetical order
    3. Table captions should use capitalised first letters


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a solid, effective presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Well selected and structured content - not too much or too little.
  2. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  3. The presentation could be strengthened by adding text to the Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation is easy to follow and interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. Consider adding more examples.
  3. There were some odd pronunciations e.g., cognitive

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Video recording quality was excellent.
  3. Audio recording quality was a bit echoey - review microphone set up.
  4. Consider muting the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio.
  5. Add acknowledgement of image sources (e.g., monkey?).

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:35, 28 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Comment[edit source]

Hi, I enjoyed reading your chapter. I would like to make a comment as I am currently writing a book chapter about childhood trauma and subsequent drug use . I did a lot of research into Bowlby's attachment theory and how these attachment styles can impact children later life. In particular, I found a study by Prather and Golden (2009) who found that children in foster care display behavioural and emotional problems and frequently possess insecure attachments. This study suggests that neglect can cause trauma in childhood whereas Bowlby's attachment theory does not necessarily talk about trauma following neglect. I would love to hear your thoughts on neglect and whether this can cause childhood trauma alongside attachment issues.

This is the study:

Prather, W., & Golden, J. A. (2009). A behavioral perspective of childhood trauma and attachment issues: Toward alternative treatment approaches for children with a history of abuse. ''International Journal of Behavioral Consultation and Therapy, 5''(1), 56. https://doi.org/10.1037/h0100872 U3210431 (discusscontribs) 02:55, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]