Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Orgasm neurology

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Heading casing[edit]

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:17, 1 September 2017 (UTC)


Topic development review and feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks will be available later via Moodle. Keep an eye on Announcements. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

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Title, sub-title, TOC[edit]

  1. Excellent
  2. Casing adjusted to be consistent with the book table of contents

User page[edit]

  1. Created
  2. Used effectively

Social contribution[edit]

  1. 3 contributions at time of topic development submission
  2. The best links go to direct evidence of the contributions made. View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see the book chapter author guidelines.

Section headings[edit]

  1. Well developed 3-level heading structure, with meaningful headings that directly relate to the core topic. However, I prefer the 2-level structure that has been subsequently developed.
  2. Different components are discussed but it would also be good to see this brought together into an integrative overview - could be in the Conclusion or a separate section?
  3. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.

Key points[edit]

  1. Key points are well developed for each section, with relevant citations.
  2. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.
  3. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  4. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end.

Image[edit]

  1. Image embedded
  2. Consider enhancing figure captions to help connect the image more strongly to key points being made in the text

References[edit]

  1. Excellent
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources[edit]

  1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 13:55, 17 October 2017 (UTC)

Peer comments[edit]

Hi Isabelle, I have read your chapter and think you have absolutely nailed it. I agree that you don't have the word count to make any drastic changes nor do I think any are necessary. I wanted to clarify in the 'non-genital orgasm' section it states "...many other forms exist such as imagery, anal and sleep", by this are you referring to anal sex, anal stimulation or the like? It may be worthwhile being more specific. To provide the reader with more detail without using any more words it may be beneficial to embed links to Wikipedia etc i.e. you have listed Parkinson in the Dopamine section of Neurotransmitters and hormones, it would be useful to the reader to be able to click on Parkinson for more information of the disease to further understand the implications. Overall the chapter is well put together, easy to follow and answers the question. Well done, Karly --U3117418 (discusscontribs) 07:51, 22 October 2017 (UTC)

Social contribution[edit]

Hi there! Really great chapter you have here - it is super informative. I suppose the only bit of constructive feedback I have for you is that maybe you could add in a couple of textboxes to break up some of the text. Also if you move a couple of images to the left it might help the page feel a bit less text-heavy. Overall though you have done a great job! Ewan :)


Chapter review and feedback[edit]

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter which integrates theory and research in an interesting way to address the topic.
  2. For additional feedback, see these copyedits.

Theory[edit]

  1. Theories are well selected, integrated, and clearly described and explained.

Research[edit]

  1. Research is well selected and explained, with a balanced, critical perspective.
  2. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit]

  1. Written expression
    1. The chapter has a well developed Overview and Conclusion, with clear focus question(s).
    2. The text is clearly written, well-structured and easy to follow.
  2. Learning features are used effectively, including interwiki links, tables and figures.
  3. Spelling, grammar and proofreading is excellent.
  4. APA style
    1. See new doi format
    2. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within volumes.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

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Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this is a well prepared presentation, making effective use of simple tools.

Structure and content[edit]

  1. Well selected and structured content - not too much or too little.
  2. Narrate the Title and Sub-title, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation.
  3. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  4. The Conclusion helps to bring an answer to the topic together, although perhaps could summarise the answer to the sub-title question.

Communication[edit]

  1. The presentation is well paced and easy to follow.
  2. The slides use easy to read text with appropriate images.

Production quality[edit]

  1. Use the full chapter title and sub-title in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Review microphone set up - it might be too close.
  3. Add acknowledgement of image sources and software used to create presentation.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:06, 28 November 2017 (UTC)