Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/Domestic violence motivation

Added link

Hi there, I hope you don't mind that I added a external link to Lifeline Australia. This is an interesting topic, I've noticed with footy finals just around the corner, that there has been some discussion in the media about the link between football finals, covid isolation and domestic violence. There was an article 4 days ago on the ABC News website "Footy finals during coronavirus leave experts 'very worried' about spike in domestic violence". Thought it might be worth looking at. Good luck with it all, hope everything is going well for you. --NUMBLA0371 (discuss • contribs) 12:09, 13 October 2020 (UTC)

Intersting Source

Hi! really interesting chapter. I have added a link to the Duluth model of power and control, it provides an intersting framework regarding what the different forms of domestic abuse are. https://www.theduluthmodel.org/wheels/understanding-power-control-wheel/--U3188019 (discuss • contribs) 19:49, 18 October 2020 (UTC)

Feedback

Hi! It might be interesting to look at different personality traits which may contribute to an increased engagement in domestic violence. I've found an article that talks about domestic violence and personality organisation which might be helpful. https://search-proquest-com.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/docview/208556765?accountid=28889&cid=CID:20201011020904030:625658&fromOL=true&pq-origsite=summon --Taylor Mamukic (discuss • contribs) 02:16, 11 October 2020 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for sentence casing. For example, the wikitext should be: == Cats and mice == rather than == Cats and Mice == -- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:42, 15 September 2020 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title OK Sub-title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents Capitalisation of the title/sub-title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents User page Excellent Social contribution Summarised with direct link(s) to evidence. Make the heading wiki style (so that an automatic table of comments will be created) Section headings Use default heading formatting (e.g., avoid bold, italics, underline etc.). Promising 2-level heading structure - could benefit from less background info and more info about the motivations for domestic violence. See earlier comment about Heading casing. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings. Key points Reasonable development, but could be improved by disciplining the focus on the topic (the sub-title) Use bullet-points Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then focus most of the content on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. The most important content will probably be what is currently planned for the "Abuse motivation and behaviour" section. Write using 3rd person perspective. Consider using more motivational-behavioural language (e.g., discuss domestic violence as a collection of different types of motivated behaviours) rather than the dispositional approach which types some people as "coercise controllers", "perpetrators" etc. Consider including more examples/case studies. Image An image (figure) is presented. Caption does not use APA style. Cite each figure at least once in the main text. Size has been decreased. References OK For APA referencing style, check and correct: capitalisation italicisation (to italicise, edit the references and wrap the text to be italicised in two single apostrophes like this''text to be italicised'' Replace "Retrieved from" with the doi Excellent Resources See also Excellent External links No need for the trigger warning / support lines - the target is not domestic violence victims / perpetrators - it is a more general audience Target an international audience; Australians only represent 0.33% of the world population

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:42, 15 September 2020 (UTC)

Domestic violence motivation suggestion

Hi, this sounds very interesting, I am looking forward to reading the completed book chapter. I did some research and found this research paper that may be of use to you, either to just enhance your understanding or to add as a reference to your book chapter. Good luck with the book chapter! https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4201052/ --User:Maddison gray1

Case studies

Hi, interesting work done so far! I can see that you are slowly developing your page, although I would suggest adding some case studies into your theme. I have a link for you that you can check out. This page has a variety of case studies based on interviews undertaken with women who agreed to be interviewed as part of the Using Law and Leaving Domestic Violence research project.https://law.uq.edu.au/research/dv/using-law-leaving-domestic-violence/case-studies U3166897 (discuss • contribs) 09:09, 18 October 2020 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall This is an insufficient chapter. This chapter is well under the maximum word count. The chapter could benefit from further development of the Overview and Conclusion - it should be possible to only read these sections and get a good sense of why the topic is important and what is known/recommended. The Overview is underdeveloped. Consider: Presenting an illustrative case study to help engage reader interest. Developing focus questions to help guide the reader and structure the chapter. This chapter makes insufficient use of primary, peer-reviewed sources as citations. Many claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the tags). The was no Conclusion. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Theory There is some promising theoretical information, but a notable lack of academic citation or reference to motivational theory. Research Overall, this chapter makes insufficient use of research. The research that is cited is entirely Australian. Provide an international, not an Australian, perspective. The Australian context could, however, be used as a case study. Written expression Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is basic. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned"). Instead: it is, most often, not needed at all, or use section linking. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences. Internationalise: Write for an international, not just a domestic audience. Australians make up only 0.32% of the world human population. The chapter would benefit from a more developed Overview and Conclusion, with clearer focus question(s) (Overview) and take-home self-help message for each focus question (Conclusion). Layout Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings. Learning features Format bullet-points and numbered lists, per Tutorial 1. No use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. See example. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Use in-text interwiki links, rather than external links, per Tutorial 1. One image. No use of table(s), feature box(es), quiz(zes), or case studies. Grammar Use serial commas[1] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's a 1 min. explanatory video. Proofreading Remove unnecessary capitalisation. APA style Do not capitalise the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc.. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). Figures and tables Use APA style for Figure captions. See example. Refer to each Table and Figure at least once within the main text (e.g., see Figure 1). Citations are not in full APA style. For example: For citations in parentheses, a comma is needed between the author and year (e.g., Smith, 2020). Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets. References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of italicisation. Include hyperlinked dois. Social contribution No logged social contributions.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:22, 24 November 2020 (UTC)