Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2016/Underage binge drinking motivation

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Comments[edit source]

Hi There

My topic is similar to your topic in a few ways (mine is illicit drug taking at music festivals ) and I came across of reference that I thought may be relevant to your topic. It was a study by Duff (2005) which talks about the normalization of drug taking in young people, claiming how it has become just a normal part of life and that such behaviour can no longer be classed as "delinquent" or "deviant" because so many "normal" members of society participate in such activities.

For your chapter, I thought it would be interesting to at least visit such a concept and think about whether normalization of binge drinking (i.e through the media/popular culture) could be motivational factor as to why we are seeing increasing numbers of binge drinking behaviour.

Here is the full reference of the article:

Duff, C. (2005). Party drugs and party people: Examining the ‘normalization’ of recreational drug use in Melbourne, Australia. International journal of drug policy, 16(3), 161-170. --U3100481 (discusscontribs) 04:56, 27 September 2016 (UTC)

Hello Great content you have! Your overview is very well written and is a nice introduction to the topic.

  • In your headings, each word does not need to have a capital letter in front of it so instead of "Defining Binge Drinking" it should be "Defining binge drinking" James added this point in my discussion tab if you wish to look :)
  • In your section Defining binge drinking, you have (National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, 2016) twice one sentence after the other, it's unnecessary to have too many of the same reference, 1 would be suffice :) I have noticed this a little bit throughout your chapter too.
  • Another suggestion might be to add some coloured boxes maybe? To break the text up a little bit

But overall this is a really great book chapter, well done!--U3100166 (discusscontribs) 07:29, 20 October 2016 (UTC)

Heading casing[edit source]

Crystal Clear app ktip.svg
FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:14, 21 October 2016 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a solid chapter which could be improved by making greater use of the interactive potential of the wiki environment.
  2. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.
  3. Feel free to make ongoing changes to the chapter if you wish to address any of these comments or make other improvements.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Theory is well covered and explained.
  2. Consider including one or more case studies or examples.

Research[edit source]

  1. Several useful, relevant studies are cited.
  2. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the method.
  3. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression is generally very good.
    1. Some paragraphs are overly long. Paragraphs should communicate a single key idea in about three to five sentences.
    2. Write in third person rather than first person (e.g., avoid "I', "we", "our", "your" etc.).
    3. The chapter successfully addresses the topic and book theme.
  2. Structure and headings
    1. The chapter is well-structured.
  3. Layout
    1. Add bullet-points for See also and External links.
    2. There is minimal use of images or tables.
  4. Integration with other chapters
    1. Some integration with other chapters evident.
  5. Learning features
    1. Add Interwiki links (to relevant Wikipedia articles) to make the text more interactive.
    2. Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement.
  6. Grammar and proofreading
    1. Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals').
  7. APA style
    1. Check and correct the use of "&" vs. "and" (Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets).
    2. Use APA style for table and figure captions.
    3. Check and correct the APA style formatting of in-text citations.
    4. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:23, 15 November 2016 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.


Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Overview
    1. Focus on engaging the viewer in the problem - takes 15-20 seconds to starting to address this
    2. Tell the listener what they will find out about if they watch this presentation - i.e., give an Overview.
  2. Selection and organisation
    1. Too much content is covered - be more selective.
    2. Abbreviate the negative consequences of binge drinking (this is not the topic)
    3. Why there is underage binge drinking - starts being addressed around 1:45 (too far into the presentation)
    4. Citations and references are included.
  3. Conclusion
    1. Provided.
    2. A Conclusion slide summarising the take-home messages / key points could be helpful - what are the main motivations?

Communication[edit source]

  1. Audio
    1. Audio is clear. Perhaps slightly too fast - consider slowing down. See this article for more information about speaking rates.
    2. Leave longer pauses between sentences.
  2. Image/Video
    1. Text heavy

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Overall, basic production using Prezi.
  2. Meta-data
    1. Rename the title so that it includes the title and subtitle (and matches the book chapter).
    2. Link to chapter provided.
    3. Fill out the description field (e.g., brief description of presentation, link back to the book chapter, license details, and possibly include references, image attributions, and/or transcript).
  3. Audio recording quality
    1. Sufficient
    2. Volume varies between slides
    3. Consider using an external microphone to improve audio recording quality.
  4. Image/video recording quality
    1. Good
  5. Licensing
    1. A copyright license for the presentation is shown.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:57, 21 November 2016 (UTC)