Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2016/Self-management and chronic illness

Making changes

Unless it is James, PLEASE CONSIDER ASKING ME BEFORE MAKING CHANGES SO I DONT GET CONFUSED!!! Please do not remove numbers on references again because they are there temporarily to keep track of my reference list and ensure it matches the copy I have saved in a document. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:54, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Comments

Hi, Your topic is very interesting. I made a minor grammatical change and wanted to say that your lay out is very great. The bubble with information works well and the case study parts about Jess are well written and its a great use of the information. Good luck and look forward to seeing the end result. --CassP22 (discuss • contribs) 01:27, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Thanks for the helpful feedback and changes. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:55, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Hi I'm interested in your topic and have previously done papers on degenerative/chronic illness in other units, I found both of these articles http://heb.sagepub.com/content/30/2/170.full.pdf+html & http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1369-7625.2011.00744.x/epdf to be a good starting point. Hope this helps. --U3090066 (discuss • contribs) 21:59, 4 September 2016 (UTC)

Thanks very much --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:54, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Hi there, interesting topic. There is another book chapter being developed on motivational interviewing which might be of interest to you as you develop this chapter. I also came across an article on motivational interviewing for people with chronic illness that might be of interest. http://www.qconsulthealthcare.com/pdf/Chronic_condition_MI.pdf Hope this is of use.--U985072 (discuss • contribs) 09:23, 3 October 2016 (UTC)

I appreciate it. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:54, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Hello! I've just read over your chapter and made minor grammatical changes. I have also posted some feedback in the Moodle forum in response to your request for a chapter review. It looks really great! Just a few points below: - I've made some minor grammatical changes throughout, including: adding full stops at the end of some sentences in the terms and definitions box to keep formatting consistent; removing the uppercase A in physical activity. - I noticed that in your contents page, 3.1 is in bold - is this intentional? - Specific illness related behaviours (i.e. insulin injections and glucose monitoring for Type 1 Diabetics)There is a growing body of research evidence to suggest that effective patient self-management can improve patient outcomes (Coleman & Newton, 2005; Gallant, 2003; Jensen, 2003; Kralik, 2004). This sentence doesn't make sense - is the first part on specific illness related diseases meant to be a part of the bullet points? Your 'barriers to self management' tables are fantastic! They are extremely informative!

All the best, U3081523 (discuss • contribs) 11:10, 18 October 2016 (UTC)

Hi, I thought your chapter reads really smoothly and is well thought out and insightful. My only suggestion would be, as someone who manages a chronic illness, perhaps within Table 2 or 3 adding an additional barrier of "unavailability of treatment services". Regardless of the public or private system, sometimes the services are not available without year long or more wait lists. Can be much worse in rural places. Great job! U3162556 (discuss • contribs) 08:38, 4 November 2016 (UTC)

First sentence suggestion.

Hi there. Just reading through your book chapter. All looks well so far, but i think the first sentence may be a little lengthy. Reshuffling the content in that sentence will allow you to create a bit more of a concise point and improve readability. :) HomerIncognito (discuss • contribs) 06:21, 13 September 2016 (UTC) thanks --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 09:16, 16 October 2016 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:53, 13 September 2016 (UTC)

Overview

Hey, so far your structure of the book is looking good, my one suggestion is to re-look at your overview, it sounds a bit more like an essay than a chapter. If you look at the marking rubric 5% is for the problem statement which I couldn't really get from your overview. Also, if you look at the textbook for this class the overview paragraph is more focused on suggesting an issue, asking the reader questions to think about (that bring you to the issue or topic) and just general background information to bring you to the start of your topic rather than explaining what the chapter will discuss the way an essay does.

Otherwise you're doing great! --CeeJay95 (discuss • contribs) 23:24, 15 October 2016 (UTC)

Thanks, I will see what I can do to improve that but I was trying to provide an overview for the article so that one could find out if it is relevant to one's needs without having to read the entire thing. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 09:16, 16 October 2016 (UTC)

Using wikilinks as headings

Hey,

I was reading through topic and really like the way you've broken the content up using tables and dot pointed information. It adds extra layer of readability. I dig it.

One comment, which James fixed for me, was using Wikilinks as headings or linking a definition to another page. The reasoning being, that if that wiki page has a better definition of what you are trying to say, or detracts from your chapter content it may be a good idea to remove the Wikilinks. Although it's totally up to you, but my interpretation of wikilinks are that they should add an extra layer of information, or provide a link to diseases or abstract words, which you are not going to describe at length.

I also added an apa hanging indent for when you are ready to create you reference list.

Anyway I hope this was helpful. Cheers, --Muzz2016 (discuss • contribs) 03:09, 17 October 2016 (UTC)

Hello, interesting topic, I have found an video on youtube which discusses about a person with chronic disease joins government funded community program in order to better manage his illness. hope that will be useful https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iyf4R0wa6QE--U3121927 (discuss • contribs) 11:05, 18 October 2016 (UTC)

Structure

I suggest avoiding having only one sub-section within a section; either add a second sub-section or merge the content with the higher level section. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:47, 21 October 2016 (UTC)

APA style for Table and Figure captions

Remember to use APA style captions for Tables and Figures. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:49, 21 October 2016 (UTC)

Comments

Hey, I thoroughly enjoyed your chapter, it's well written and I like the formatting to highlight salient points & the case study. As has been previously mentioned the APA formatting on pictures and tables is missing, but overall I think it's a high quality chapter. Best of luck with any finishing touches!! --U3090066 (discuss • contribs) 03:23, 22 October 2016 (UTC)

Hello, just read your topic, very informative. well done. Gathered a lot of useful information and points--124.168.150.11 (discuss) 07:00, 4 November 2016 (UTC)u3164249

Making changes

Unless it is James, PLEASE CONSIDER ASKING ME BEFORE MAKING CHANGES SO I DONT GET CONFUSED!!! Please do not remove numbers on references again because they are there temporarily to keep track of my reference list and ensure it matches the copy I have saved in a document. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:54, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Comments

Hi, Your topic is very interesting. I made a minor grammatical change and wanted to say that your lay out is very great. The bubble with information works well and the case study parts about Jess are well written and its a great use of the information. Good luck and look forward to seeing the end result. --CassP22 (discuss • contribs) 01:27, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Thanks for the helpful feedback and changes. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:55, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Hi I'm interested in your topic and have previously done papers on degenerative/chronic illness in other units, I found both of these articles http://heb.sagepub.com/content/30/2/170.full.pdf+html & http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1369-7625.2011.00744.x/epdf to be a good starting point. Hope this helps. --U3090066 (discuss • contribs) 21:59, 4 September 2016 (UTC)

Thanks very much --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:54, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Hi there, interesting topic. There is another book chapter being developed on motivational interviewing which might be of interest to you as you develop this chapter. I also came across an article on motivational interviewing for people with chronic illness that might be of interest. http://www.qconsulthealthcare.com/pdf/Chronic_condition_MI.pdf Hope this is of use.--U985072 (discuss • contribs) 09:23, 3 October 2016 (UTC)

I appreciate it. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 03:54, 19 October 2016 (UTC)

Hello! I've just read over your chapter and made minor grammatical changes. I have also posted some feedback in the Moodle forum in response to your request for a chapter review. It looks really great! Just a few points below: - I've made some minor grammatical changes throughout, including: adding full stops at the end of some sentences in the terms and definitions box to keep formatting consistent; removing the uppercase A in physical activity. - I noticed that in your contents page, 3.1 is in bold - is this intentional? - Specific illness related behaviours (i.e. insulin injections and glucose monitoring for Type 1 Diabetics)There is a growing body of research evidence to suggest that effective patient self-management can improve patient outcomes (Coleman & Newton, 2005; Gallant, 2003; Jensen, 2003; Kralik, 2004). This sentence doesn't make sense - is the first part on specific illness related diseases meant to be a part of the bullet points? Your 'barriers to self management' tables are fantastic! They are extremely informative!

All the best, U3081523 (discuss • contribs) 11:10, 18 October 2016 (UTC)

Hi, I thought your chapter reads really smoothly and is well thought out and insightful. My only suggestion would be, as someone who manages a chronic illness, perhaps within Table 2 or 3 adding an additional barrier of "unavailability of treatment services". Regardless of the public or private system, sometimes the services are not available without year long or more wait lists. Can be much worse in rural places. Great job! U3162556 (discuss • contribs) 08:38, 4 November 2016 (UTC)

First sentence suggestion.

Hi there. Just reading through your book chapter. All looks well so far, but i think the first sentence may be a little lengthy. Reshuffling the content in that sentence will allow you to create a bit more of a concise point and improve readability. :) HomerIncognito (discuss • contribs) 06:21, 13 September 2016 (UTC) thanks --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 09:16, 16 October 2016 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:53, 13 September 2016 (UTC)

Overview

Hey, so far your structure of the book is looking good, my one suggestion is to re-look at your overview, it sounds a bit more like an essay than a chapter. If you look at the marking rubric 5% is for the problem statement which I couldn't really get from your overview. Also, if you look at the textbook for this class the overview paragraph is more focused on suggesting an issue, asking the reader questions to think about (that bring you to the issue or topic) and just general background information to bring you to the start of your topic rather than explaining what the chapter will discuss the way an essay does.

Otherwise you're doing great! --CeeJay95 (discuss • contribs) 23:24, 15 October 2016 (UTC)

Thanks, I will see what I can do to improve that but I was trying to provide an overview for the article so that one could find out if it is relevant to one's needs without having to read the entire thing. --Jessann95 (discuss • contribs) 09:16, 16 October 2016 (UTC)

Using wikilinks as headings

Hey,

I was reading through topic and really like the way you've broken the content up using tables and dot pointed information. It adds extra layer of readability. I dig it.

One comment, which James fixed for me, was using Wikilinks as headings or linking a definition to another page. The reasoning being, that if that wiki page has a better definition of what you are trying to say, or detracts from your chapter content it may be a good idea to remove the Wikilinks. Although it's totally up to you, but my interpretation of wikilinks are that they should add an extra layer of information, or provide a link to diseases or abstract words, which you are not going to describe at length.

I also added an apa hanging indent for when you are ready to create you reference list.

Anyway I hope this was helpful. Cheers, --Muzz2016 (discuss • contribs) 03:09, 17 October 2016 (UTC)

Hello, interesting topic, I have found an video on youtube which discusses about a person with chronic disease joins government funded community program in order to better manage his illness. hope that will be useful https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iyf4R0wa6QE--U3121927 (discuss • contribs) 11:05, 18 October 2016 (UTC)

Structure

I suggest avoiding having only one sub-section within a section; either add a second sub-section or merge the content with the higher level section. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:47, 21 October 2016 (UTC)

APA style for Table and Figure captions

Remember to use APA style captions for Tables and Figures. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:49, 21 October 2016 (UTC)

Comments

Hey, I thoroughly enjoyed your chapter, it's well written and I like the formatting to highlight salient points & the case study. As has been previously mentioned the APA formatting on pictures and tables is missing, but overall I think it's a high quality chapter. Best of luck with any finishing touches!! --U3090066 (discuss • contribs) 03:23, 22 October 2016 (UTC)

Hello, just read your topic, very informative. well done. Gathered a lot of useful information and points--124.168.150.11 (discuss) 07:00, 4 November 2016 (UTC)u3164249

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall The 2016 book table of contents has been updated to reflect the current title of this chapter and the chapter page name has been changed to reflect this too. Overall, this is a very strong chapter which incorporates a balanced, critical overview of relevant theory and research and makes effective use of the wiki environment to address a real life psychological problem. The chapter is over the maximum word count. See my copyedits. Theory The Overview establishes the importance of the topic and the approach of the chapter. The Conclusion offers a succint summary and emphasises solutions. The integrated case study is very helpful. Research A very good range of relevant research is discussed and cited. Some statements are unreferenced (e.g., see the tags) When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the method. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Written expression Written expression is, generally, very good, although it is unnecessarily wordy in some places. Avoid starting sentences with a source's author or date, unless this is particularly pertinent. Provide the citation at the end of the sentence instead. The chapter successfully addresses the topic and book theme. Some clarification templates have been added to the page. Structure and headings Avoid sections with only one sub-section. A section should have no sub-sections or at least two sub-sections. See earlier comments about heading casing Layout Tables and/or Figures are used effectively. Integration with other chapters The chapter provides an excellent range of relevant links to other Wikiversity pages. Learning features Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added - these only need to be added for the initial mention of a keyword; use plain text for the keyword subsequently.fet Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement. Grammar and proofreading Check and correct the use of abbreviations (such as "etc."). Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals'). The grammar of some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). APA style Check and correct the use of APA style for direct quotes. Check and correct the use of "&" vs. "and" (Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets). The reference list is not in full APA style. The APA style for the reference list is very good; remove issue numbers for paginated journals. subjects -> participants

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 15:29, 16 November 2016 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation. Way over the maximum 3 min. time limit Structure and content Overview Brief, but sufficient. Consider including a tangible example to engage reader interest. Explain what the problem is and will be covered. Selection and organisation Too much content is covered - be more selective. Lots of theory; very little research. No citations? Conclusion Weak; emphasise practical take-home messages / key points. Communication Audio Clear. Some slips/pauses. Somewhat monotone. Consider using greater intonation to enhance engagement.[1] Image/Video Increase font size to make text easier to read. Reduce the amount of text shown. Consider including images. Production quality Overall, basic production. Meta-data Include sub-title. Minimal use of the Description field - include link to book chapter. Audio recording quality OK Mouse/keyboard click is audible - consider using an external microphone. Image/video recording quality Sufficient Licensing A copyright license for the presentation is not indicated (i.e., in the description or in the presentation slides).

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 14:32, 20 November 2016 (UTC)