Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Human interaction and emotion

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Heading casing[edit]

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:01, 1 November 2015 (UTC)


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this is an unsufficient chapter mainly because it fails to address the topic, does not include citations, and contained plagiarised material.
  2. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.

Theory[edit]

  1. Some theory about emotion and some theory about human interactions is discussed. However, the chapter fails to consider theory related to the connection between emotions and human interaction.
  2. There are no citations.
  3. Addition of case studies or additional examples could be helpful.

Research[edit]

  1. There is no review of research.

Written expression[edit]

  1. The Overview is very vague. What factors? For example?
  2. Many statements were unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
  3. The quality of written expression could be improved (e.g., see where clarification templates have been added to the page).
  4. Write in third person rather than first person (e.g., avoid "I', "we", "our", "your" etc.).
  5. Obtaining (earlier) comments on a chapter plan and/or chapter draft could have helped to improve the chapter.
  6. Some of the material appears to have been plagiarised from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-carmen-harra/controlling-your-emotions_b_3654326.html?ir=Australia and was removed.
  7. The chapter would benefit from a more developed Overview and Conclusion, with clearer focus question(s) (Overview) and take-home self-help message for each focus question (Conclusion).
  8. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing
    2. No images or tables were used.
  9. Learning features
    1. Add Interwiki links (e.g., to relevant Wikipedia articles and other Wikiversity book chapters) to make the text more interactive.
    2. Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement.
  10. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (some general examples are hypothesize -> hypothesise; behavior -> behaviour).
  11. Grammar and proofreading
    1. The grammar of some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    2. Check and correct the use of abbreviations (such as "e.g.," and "i.e.,").
  12. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 07:52, 15 December 2015 (UTC)


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

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Overall[edit]

  1. Overall, this is a basic narrated text presentation.
  2. The presentation is not able to played online (it needs to be downloaded).

Structure and content[edit]

  1. Use the Overview to set up the problem to be solved (the question i.e., the subtitle for the book chapter).
  2. Theory and research weren't covered.
  3. Include citations about evidence for claims.
  4. Perhaps consider using more illustrative examples.
  5. A Conclusion slide summarising the take-home messages / key points could be helpful.

Communication[edit]

  1. Audio is too fast - consider slowing down. See this article for more information about speaking rates.
  2. Varied intonation can add interest and engagement.
  3. Consider included images.

Production quality[edit]

  1. A link to the presentation was not provided at the top of the book chapter (a link has now been added).
  2. Rename the title so that it includes the subtitle (and matches the book chapter).
  3. Description is minimal but sufficient.
  4. No link is provided back to the book chapter.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:05, 15 December 2015 (UTC)