Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Dyslexia and anxiety in children

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Comments[edit source]

Hey you may want to look at anxiety about not knowing something or having to answer in front of class. Or having difficulties reading. All the best Iga.leszczynska (discusscontribs) 02:14, 9 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

theories[edit source]

Hi. what an interesting topic you have! i would suggest you look at the evolution theory, the cerebellar theory and the magnocellular theory. I believe these are all biological theories which would benefit your book chapter and help explain how and why dyslexia occurs :) good luck! --U3034876 (discusscontribs) 00:34, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Lee! What a cool chapter :) I like the case study you provided, it gives the reader an insight into what dyslexia is like for a child. Nice use of coloured boxes and images! (Just add 'Figure 1, figure 2..' to each one!). I like how you've explained the symptoms and different types of dyslexia, as I had no idea there were that many different types! Other theories you could look at include the Phonological Deficit Theory and the Perceptual Visual-Noise Exclusion Hypothesis. Adding a table or diagram about one of the theories could help break down all the info into an easy to read section :) Good luck! --Bt1718 (discusscontribs) 12:38, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Hey :) such an interesting topic. Your chapter looks great so far. So the conventions headings are sentence style - Dsylexia and anxiety in children; so i went through and just fixed these up for you, i know how time consuming and fiddly these things are. :) hope that helps you out (3083783ro (discusscontribs) 02:15, 23 October 2015 (UTC)=3083783)[reply]

Great work, Lee. It reads well. I went through and cleaned it up a bit. You had a some spelling mistakes which I thought was ironic because you did the topic on dyslexia. Also I fixed up a couple of run-on sentences and general grammar. Just give it a once over to make sure it's all good =) Komali 21 (discusscontribs) 04:31, 25 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:17, 18 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a promising, useful, well-targeted chapter which could be improved by expanding the theory and research pertaining to the relationship between dyslexia and anxiety. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.

Theory[edit source]

  1. The life example throughout was excellent.
  2. In terms of overall structure and balance, the chapter tends to overaddress "What is dyslexia?" (i.e., the first half) and underaddress "What is the effect of dyslexia on anxiety?"
  3. Expand on the three theories suggested by Nelson and Hardwood (2011) - this looks to me like the key theoretical framework for this topic.

Research[edit source]

  1. Expand on discussion of Riddick, Sterling, Farmer and Morgan’s (1999), given that it is the major study on the topic.
  2. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the sample and possibly cultural context.
  3. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  4. Some claims are not supported by citations (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Check consistency of capitalisation of Dyslexia vs. dyslexia
    2. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., above, below, as previously mentioned)
    3. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    4. The quality of written expression could be improved (e.g., see where clarification templates have been added to the page).
    5. Some statements could be expanded - see the [Provide more detail] tags
  2. Layout
    1. Add bullet-points for See also and External links
    2. Remove colons from headings
  3. Basis use of Tables and Figures.
  4. Learning features
    1. The chapter makes excellent use of interwiki links to other book chapters and to relevant Wikipedia articles.
    2. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links
    3. The chapter provides an excellent range of relevant links to other Wikiversity pages.
  5. Spelling
    1. Spelling could be improved - see the [spelling?] tags
  6. Grammar and proofreading
    1. The grammar of some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags)
  7. APA style
    1. In-text citation is not correct APA style (Put in-text citations in alphabetical order and no commas between authors when there are two authors).
    2. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:17, 18 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but effective summary of the topic.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Theory was well covered, although there could be less on describing what dyslexia is and more on describing anxiety in the context of dyslexia.
  2. There some mention of research - perhaps this could be increased/enhanced.
  3. Perhaps consider using more illustrative examples.
  4. The message is clear and well-balanced, with practical, take-home messages.

Communication[edit source]

  1. Audio was clear and well-paced.
  2. The heavy reliance on handwritten text for visuals was somewhat limited.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. The link from the Wikiversity chapter page wasn't working (fixed now).
  2. The visuals are low-light and low-resolution. Combined with the fine handwriting and handheld camera(?), it makes the text difficult to read (which is somewhat ironical, given the topic).
  3. There is too much text for the time allowed for each page.
  4. Consider adding some illustrative images or diagrams or charts etc. to organise and visually communicate the ideas.
  5. A copyright license for the presentation is not indicated (e.g., in the description or in the presentation slides).
  6. No link is provided back to the book chapter.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:47, 25 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]