Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Digestive system and emotion

From Wikiversity
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Comments[edit source]

Hi, not sure if you have finished or not however i noticed that for one of your references you have (Bugs in the brain?, 2015) this appears throughout your chapter and I assume that's not someones name, mistake?? Just in case thought i would bring it to your attention in the hope you have time to correct. Cheers U116040



Hi, it looks good so far however i have a few suggestions. Mood disorders What effects to Microbes have on depression and anxiety, it is only these mood disorders or could there also be others. How do you treat the concerns associated with Microbes for depression and anxiety? Cheers u116040


Hi Tessa

Thanks for your advice regarding my bookchapter on flow and mastery (No. 41), much appreciated. I've looked at your chapter and would like to offer the following:

The table of contents looks like a good plan of things you may wish to cover, is logical and gives the chapter a pertinent focus on depression and anxiety.

Figure 1 was not only informative but also serves as a visual reminder that your topic is relevant to just about anyone with a relatively similar anatomical make up to that shown.

I entirely agree that the topic you've chosen is exciting, even amazing, because of its relevance to most of us and the potential applications. I admire the intelligence of your choice in topic.

You may wish to consider inserting hyperlinks on the first use of terms and names such as: microbe; microbiota; Joshua Lederberg (as you've done with Elie Metchnikoff); and emotions.

Under the heading 'microbiomes', you may wish to visually highlight the sentence beginning 'Lederberg highlighted the importance...' as goes to the core of your subject matter and sets the scene for what is to follow.

You may wish to insert a reference for the first sentence under the heading 'emotions'. Likewise for the last sentence, under the same heading, and also for the sentence currently under the heading 'mood disorders'. You may wish to consider the use of a table that provides a summary of microbes and mood disorders, or perhaps a diagram to highlight relationships between the two.

Figure 4 is just a wonderful photo.

Under the heading 'conclusion', you may wish to distinctly highlight the challenges associated with proposed interventions, also in a presentation sense. You may also wish to identify where the gaps in research are. You may also wish to note the rapidly expanding global industry around gut health and the role of science in separating fact from fiction, and where people can go to get science based advice (see suggestions below).

Your reference list looks impressive.

In any 'links' section, you may wish to consider including:

www.gutfoundation.com.au www.gesa.org.au

The latter has an interesting section on 'clinical updates' and statistics, which may be of assistance. If you perform a site search using the term 'depression', I suspect you will find information that is of relevance to your chapter. I also found an article, which may be of interest: http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2015/05/17/gut-bacteria-brain-health.aspx

Thanks for inviting me to look at your very fascinating chapter!

Kind regards

Daniel u118741

Minor Edits[edit source]

Hi, I have just added a few minor edits. This looks like a very interesting chapter! I can't wait to read the finished product. I have just finished reading the book 'Gut and Psychology Syndrome', it's a great read and might be useful for extra info :) Chiara Tigeralee (discusscontribs) 10:19, 24 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Hi! Your chapter looks amazing, seriously hard to fault. I love the Timeline of human gut microbiome development, how you've discussed all ages and the use of the blue table of the relevant theories. You've covered a lot of different articles to gain some really interesting info and the external links are great. Amazing work. --Bt1718 (discusscontribs) 7:06, 25 October 2015 (UTC)


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a fantastic chapter which perhaps could be improved by concentrating more on the influence of the digestive system on emotion.
  2. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Theory is excellent; perhaps concentrate more on the relationship between the digestive system and emotion.
  2. The practical tips were helpful.

Research[edit source]

  1. Research is well covered and integrated; perhaps concentrate more on the relationship between the digestive system and emotion.
  2. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    2. The Overview and Conclusion are clear and well-written.
  2. Layout
    1. Avoid sections with only one sub-section. A section should have no sub-sections or at least two sub-sections.
    2. The chapter is well-structured.
    3. Tables and/or Figures are used effectively.
  3. Learning features
    1. The chapter makes very good use of interwiki links to relevant Wikipedia articles and related book chapters.
    2. Quiz questions are used effectively to encourage reader engagement.
  4. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise).
  5. APA style
    1. Check and correct the APA style formatting of in-text citations for "et al.".
    2. The reference list is close to full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:48, 23 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is an excellent, interesting all-round presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Well structured.
  2. Theory and research were covered.
  3. Conclusion slide was helpful.

Communication[edit source]

  1. Audio is clear and well-paced.
  2. Visuals are clear and easy to read.
  3. The combination of images and text is effective.
  4. Engaging intonation.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. The audio recording quality is a bit tinny/echoey - check microphone set-up.
  2. Clear title.
  3. Useful information in description field.
  4. Appropriately licensed.
  5. The copyright licenses and sources for the images used is not indicated - there may have been copyright violation unless you own the copyright to the images used or these were public domain images.
  6. Link provided to chapter.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:41, 26 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]