Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Bipolar disorder and motivation in the work place

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Comments[edit source]

Hi, just thinking you should put a DSM V reference in your overview to help define bi polar disorder. Connorkaye (discuss • contribs) 12:20, 16 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Re: Thanks, I've started writing an overview of Bipolar Disorder using DSM-5. Very useful book!


Hey, I have noticed you are a little thin on workplace interventions. Here is a good example of an Australian Government intervention.

https://www.headsup.org.au/general/about-us/mentally-healthy-workplace-alliance

Hope this is helpful.

Ideas[edit source]

Your chapter looks awesome, very informative and comprehensive. I thought you could maybe make a table differentiating between bipolar I and II, and describe characteristics of each? (just to break up the text). Also, your figures aren't in APA, so make sure you don't forget to change them. U3083676 (discuss • contribs) 04:26, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a reasonable chapter, but it has fallen into the trap of having too much emphasis on the disorder and treatment and insufficient focus on the relationship between the disorder and motivation.
  2. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Theory about BD is quite comprehensive, but this can and should be abbreviated (with links to more info e.g., the Wikipedia article about BD) and the rest of the chapter can then be more tailored towards the relationship with motivation.
  2. Addition of case studies or additional examples could be helpful.

Research[edit source]

  1. Research detail about key studies related to the topic could be expanded.
  2. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the sample and possibly cultural context.
  3. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. The written expression somewhat cumbersome/overly wordy - strive for clear, simple language.
    2. The written expression could be improved by using an active rather than passive voice.
    3. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., above, below, as previously mentioned).
    4. Write in third person rather than first person (e.g., "we")
  2. Layout
    1. Use default heading styles; remove bold
    2. Add bullet-points for See also and External links.
  3. Learning features
    1. The chapter makes some use of interwiki links to relevant Wikipedia articles - also incorporate links to related book chapters.
    2. Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement.
  4. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise).
  5. Grammar and proofreading
    1. Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals').
    2. The grammar of some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
  6. APA style
    1. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:36, 24 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Key theory and research is covered.
  2. Perhaps consider using more illustrative examples.
  3. There was no mention of the effect of medication (e.g., lithium) on BPD motivation.
  4. The conclusion could emphasise the key points about the manic vs. depressive phase impacts on work motivation.

Communication[edit source]

  1. Audio is clear and well-paced.
  2. Consider incorporating images or diagrams.
  3. Text is difficult to read (dark colour on similar coloured background - aim for high contrast)

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Rename the title so that it matches the book chapter topic - Bipolar disorder and motivation in the work place - How does bipolar disorder influence motivation in the work place?
  2. Fill out the description field (e.g., brief description of presentation, license details, etc.)
  3. A copyright license for the presentation is not indicated (i.e., in the description or in the presentation slides).

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:11, 26 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

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