Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Autism and emotional development

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Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:48, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a promising chapter which could be improved by abbreviating the stand-alone material about childhood development, autism, and emotional development (and linking to more info on dedicated pages/sources) and then concentrating more on the target topic.
  2. Rewrite the Overview to focus on the chapter topic - autism and emotional development
  3. Add a Conclusion
  4. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Theory coverage is comprehensive - perhaps too comprehensive.
  2. Abbreviate the general theory and concentrate on emotional development theory as it relates to autism.

Research[edit source]

  1. Website citations are overused; use primary, peer-reviewed sources.
  2. Research coverage is good and well-integrated with theory.
  3. Some statements were unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
  4. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the sample and possibly cultural context.
  5. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., above, below, as previously mentioned).
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter is well presented.
    2. Consider more headings/sub-headings.
    3. See earlier comments about heading casing
    4. Add bullet-points for See also and External links.
    5. Tables and/or Figures are used effectively.
  3. Learning features
    1. Add Interwiki links (e.g., to relevant Wikipedia articles and other Wikiversity book chapters) to make the text more interactive.
    2. Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement.
  4. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise).
  5. Grammar and proofreading
    1. Several sentences are not grammatically correct because they need additional commas or have commas in incorrect places.
    2. The grammar of some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
  6. APA style
    1. Check and correct the APA style formatting of in-text citations.
    2. Add APA style captions to tables and figures (e.g., italicise Figure X).
    3. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:26, 24 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Theory was well covered; research less so.
  2. Perhaps consider using more illustrative examples.
  3. A conclusion slide summarising the take-home messages could be helpful.

Communication[edit source]

  1. Consider increasing font size on some slides to make the text easier to read (using a template that allows use of the more of the screen could help in this respect).
  2. Varied intonation adds engagement and interest.
  3. Consider using images/diagrams to add interest.
  4. Audio is clear and well-paced.

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Overall, well produced.
  2. Excellent licensing.
  3. Rename the title so that it includes the subtitle.
  4. Description is minimal but sufficient; also include e.g., brief description of presentation, link back to the book chapter, and license details (in case a viewer isn't looking at the last few seconds of the presentation).
  5. No link is provided back to the book chapter.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:21, 26 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]