Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2014/Pets and motivation

From Wikiversity
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Really like your start to the topic so far[edit source]

I made a few minor grammatical changes that helped with the overall flow of the more complete paragraphs. I really like your use of anecdotes and examples, and I think you're really on track with this topic - keep it up.

Joelthebaws (discusscontribs)

I have added in a study about equine therapy and children with autism. I am so glad you have put in equine therapy as someone who rides horses and has witnessed the effects of Pegasas. Such a great topic to read!! U3081461 (discusscontribs) 08:15, 15 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:54, 22 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

APA style captions for images and tables[edit source]

I recommend using APA style captions i.e., Figure 1, Figure 2 etc. for all images, graphs etc. and Table 1, Table 2 etc. for all tables. The caption text should not be in italics. For more detail and examples, see http://libguides.newcastle.edu.au/content.php?pid=113807&sid=1208571 -- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:35, 23 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Really Interesting! Coloured Text Boxes...[edit source]

Hey! Your topic is really interesting, I've enjoyed reading it :) I saw something on Moodle earlier today regarding coloured text boxes, I'm not 100% sure about it but apparently it isn't correct APA formatting. Maybe double check just in case! :) --121.223.187.104 (discuss) 10:22, 26 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

Overall[edit source]

Overall, this presentation is very nicely put together. Well done!

Structure and content[edit source]

The structure is good, with a nice flow throughout. Theory and research are well integrated, however could have been referred to more directly in areas. The concluding slide was a useful inclusion. An introductory slide, outlining the presentation, would be beneficial.

Communication[edit source]

Communication is very well done. The voice-over is well-paced, with very engaging expression and appropriate pauses between sentences and slides - well done! Good use of examples. Pictures, video links and figures are used effectively throughout. Although, some figures are too small. Slightly less text could have been included on some slides.

Production quality[edit source]

Production tools used are simple but effective. Quality of audio and visuals are both very good. The presentation had a professional feel. A link to the book chapter is provided. Indication of copyright license is not provided. ShaunaB - Talk


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a reasonable chapter, but it has the fundamental problem of not directly focusing its content on the topic/question. For more feedback, see my copyedits and comments below.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Abbreviate the general material about motivation and provide a link to further information; concentrate the theoretical coverage on the specific topic - how pets can influence motivation.
  2. Useful examples are provided. However, they are somewhat speculative and not sufficiently linked to theory and research.

Research[edit source]

  1. The chapter should be based on peer-reviewed references; many of the references used do not appear to be peer-reviewed publications.
  2. Some statements were unreferenced - see the [factual?] tags
  3. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  4. There is a tendency to discuss therapeutic benefits rather than motivational influences (e.g., Horse therapy)
  5. The relevance of the learned helplessness experiment with dogs is unclear.

Written expression[edit source]

    1. Several paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    2. Use gender-inclusive language e.g., his -> his/her
    3. The chapter would benefit from a more developed Overview and Conclusion, with clearer focus question(s) (Overview) and take-home self-help message for each focus question (Conclusion).
  1. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing
    2. More effective use could be made of Tables and/or Figures to help illustrate key points.
  2. Learning features
    1. The text could become more interactive by including interwiki links.
  3. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
    1. Check use of ownership apostrophes e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals'
  4. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. Add APA style captions to tables and figures.
    3. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    4. The reference list was not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:16, 27 November 2014 (UTC)[reply]