Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2011/Violent video games

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Comments[edit source]

I think this is such a hot topic right now. I have seen lots of debates about violence in movies, video games and TV and whether that can cause more violence in real life. I looking forward to reading more in-depth information about this topic, not just opinions of tv hosts. Outline looks really good EamesA 00:33, 27 October 2011 (UTC)

I appreciate the feedback, thank you EamesA. But yes the debate surrounding violent video games at the moment is so prevelent due to the increase in demand in the industry of violent games. However, this does make it challenging as there is substancial support and opposition for the violent games= aggression hypothesis.

Atice 01 02:20, 28 October 2011 (UTC)

Hi there - your chapter looks great so far! Maybe you could include an info box with some details on the R18+ classification? Also, I wondered if you had planned to look at Bandura's social learning theory? This idea of learning through observation is particularly important, I think. I look forward to reading more! ShaunaB 20:55, 28 October 2011 (UTC)

Hey Shauna, thanks for the suggestions. Some good ideas. I originally considered using the social learning theory seperately. However, i thought that it is covered substancially in the GAM part. But upon your suggestion i am reconsidering putting the SLT in its own heading! so thank-you :)--Atice 01 03:46, 30 October 2011 (UTC)

Hey there Andrew. Your page looks like it is coming along nicely! Great coverage of theory, and the studies youve included are fantastic. I did this topic for the social psych essay so I love reading what others tihnk on the topic too. I would possibly include some of the theories that support the positive aspects of violent video games :) Fantastic job and look forward to seeing the finished product! Courtney.reis 07:37, 29 October 2011 (UTC)

Courtney, thank-you for your feedback, it is very encouraging :). I hope I can do the subject justice. You must have read my mind, because i am currently in the process of making a section about the positive implications of violent games haha. So ill defiently have that up soon! cheers--Atice 01 03:46, 30 October 2011 (UTC)

Hi Andrew, your chapter seems to be coming along very nicely. Although lovely and bright, the colours seemed to strain my eyes a little while reading - maybe you could tone the orange and red down a little? Your section on methodological flaws is especially well written. Maybe your introduction could start with a focus question or scenario. Great work :)AngeM 12:47, 30 October 2011 (UTC)

Hey thanks for the comment. with regards to the colours i was just experimenting a bit, just testing the limits of wiki :) But yeah i do agree that red was fairly full-on haha. Thanks for the positive feedback. Im contemplating doing as you suggested and putting in a section at the start about the columbine high school shootings! Atice 01 06:21, 31 October 2011 (UTC)

Hi Atice 01, I am really enjoying how your chapter is coming along, the colours are exquisite and the subject is really good too. I'm not sure if you are aware but as Courtney mentioned the psychology students also did an essay earlier on this in social psychology so it may be worth looking at the e reserve for that subject. Other than that I am really enjoying the colours and the boxes with information in them, bravo Atice 01. EssDubz 07:11, 31 October 2011 (UTC)

Samuel, thank-you my good sir. Your suggestions are sincerely appreciated, and your opinion valued.I am looking forward to your page xoxo Atice 01 13:58, 1 November 2011 (UTC)

Hey Atice01. I have had a read of your text and I must say I really think you write well - it is academic but still in plain language which is easy to digest as the reader. Also, I like how you've included the limitations of the study - you've covered the limitations in specific detail. Hhhmm I may have to improve my chapter in this respect! Well done :-) TabithaJ 08:40, 31 October 2011 (UTC)

Wow thanks Tabitha, your comments mean a lot :) Thank you for the positive feedback. I shall write on your page. Although, from what ive already seen i doubt there is anyway it could get much better :) Atice 01 13:58, 1 November 2011 (UTC)

Hey Atice. I am loving the link to the Columbine shootings. Personally I know a few gamers who think things like "why should I give up gaming 15 hours a day, it's not harming anyone". The link to the shootings really contextualises the bigger picture - good job! TabithaJ 00:52, 3 November 2011 (UTC)

Thanks again for the input Tabitha, your contributions have been helpful :)Atice 01 11:35, 3 November 2011 (UTC)

Hey there! A very colourful chapter! I really enjoyed reading your topic. I actually chose the same topic for my social psychology essay this semester. Glad to know I included most of this information in my essay (fingers crossed I do well)!! I like your in depth analysis on the methodological flaws, something I found quite hard to structure during my essay. Good luck with everything :) SKM1501 03:25, 04 November 2011 (UTC)

Sorry forgot to mention...not sure if you are planning on adding this, but I think it will be interesting to mention gender differences that may occur during violent video games. I think most people would have a generalised view on what these may be, it might be help mentioning it somewhere along the chapter. Just an idea! SKM1501 03:28, 04 November 2011 (UTC)

Hey I really do appreciate that you, and everyone else, have put in in helping me with my page. So thank-you. Im glad you enhoyed it. Yeah that definently would be intresting for this topic, however, im currently in a fight against the word limit haha. Nonetheless, your suggestion is valid and will definently be considered. Thanks mate :) Atice 01 12:50, 4 November 2011 (UTC)

Hey, It seemed that your section Relevance and Significance of Violent Video Game Debate, seemed better at weighing up of both sides like an introduction, than the Columbine story (as this is the first thing people read), you might want to consider swapping the positions of these. Other than that good work.Mlac 14:20, 5 November 2011 (UTC)

Hey Mlac. your suggestion makes a lot of sense and is very logical. by having the columbine thing first it sort of sways peoples decisions on the topic straight away. Furthermore, it makes the chapter flow better from columbine to supportive theoretical concepts. So thank you heaps. Your suggestion has defienently improved the structure :) hope all is going well for you! Atice 01 12:08, 6 November 2011 (UTC)

Hey Atice 01, I had a look and noticed you were yet to add a definition for aggression so i stepped in :) I hope you can use what i have put down in some way, I'll also add the reference to your reference list in case you choose to keep it. Good luck Atice 01 --EssDubz 13:57, 6 November 2011 (UTC)

Greatly appreciated EssDubz. Good initative on your part :) Atice 01 15:19, 6 November 2011 (UTC)

Colours[edit source]

I'm keen to check this chapter out - but whadyareckon about toning the colours down? I find the red background, in particular, very hard to read. I'd suggest pale background colours, if any. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:03, 30 October 2011 (UTC)

Hey James thanks for the feedback, i really appreciate any suggestions you have. As i mentioned to Ange above i was just exploring the various possibilities that wikiversity has to offer. but yeah ive defiently made it more simplier/easier to read.

Atice 01 06:21, 31 October 2011 (UTC)

Images[edit source]

Maybe you can find some images to help illustrate this chapter? Check out Wikimedia Commons. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:03, 30 October 2011 (UTC):

thanks James. i was focusing on the content first. but now ive done that i defiently think photos will add to the presentation of the page. :) Atice 01 06:21, 31 October 2011 (UTC)

Heading casing[edit source]

Crystal Clear app ktip.svg
FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:32, 6 November 2011 (UTC)

Draft feedback[edit source]

I've had a quick look - here's some comments:

  1. Separate opening case study / example from Introduction or Overview. Make sure the Intro explains to the reader the focus questions and what s/he can learn about him/her self via reading this chapter.
  2. Beef up self-help focus - Make it clear to a reader esp. in the Intro and Summary what the take-home self-help messages are with regard to VVGs.
  3. Quiz description indicates about sexual motivation
  4. Critical focus - excellent to see competing sides of the theoretical argument presented. Perhaps a summary table suggesting some of the potential risks and benefits of VVGs could be provided.
  5. Supportive Theoretical Explanations - start this section off with an overview of the theories before diving into them; end with a summary which weighs their relative support.

Hope this helps. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:41, 6 November 2011 (UTC)

Fantastic chapter - really well done - congratulations - Magnolia


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a somewhat difficult chapter to provide feedback about because, on the one hand, it does an excellent job of reviewing theoretical and research literature about the extent to which VVGs may influence aggression and violent behaviour, whilst on the hand, the achilles heal of this chapter is that it struggles to, and doesn't really quite manage to fit with the assessment exercise theme of using psychological science about motivation and/or emotion to help people lead more effective lives with regard to specified problem.

Theory[edit source]

  1. Theories are well covered and explained, with critical perspective, and consideration of potential undesirable and desirable effects of VVGs
  2. Limited relation is made between the theories and motivation and/or emotion

Research[edit source]

  1. Several useful research studies about VVG and aggression are described, with strong emphasis on methodological critique. This would probably be most appropriate to a traditional literature review or academic essay. It is not out of place necessarily in a self-help chapter, but perhaps greater emphasis on practical examples of how VVGs may motivate aggression and how VVGs may aid emotional regulation (for example) could be more appropriate to the self-help book focus.
  2. When describing important research findings, try to indicate the size of effects rather than simply whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. The chapter adopts a relatively traditional academic style, but also makes effective use of the wiki-format, with interwiki links, external links to additional resources, use of examples (e.g., Columbine massacre) etc.
    2. The introduction could benefit from development of focus questions that relate to the book's central themes (see Tutorial 1.
    3. The guidelines for parents in the Summary are helpful and fit the theme/intent of the chapter exercise.
    4. The chapter clearly benefits from active engagement in soliciting and responding to peer-review feedback. Perhaps some work around the initial plan and focusing in around the book theme would also have been important in shaping this chapter.
  2. Learning features
    1. Some images with basic captions are provided.
    2. The quiz is a useful self-reflection. Perhaps the questions could be put into each section separately.
  3. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
    1. In general, spelling, grammar and proofreading are good. Minor typos noted. Seek also suggested clarifications for improving quality of written expression e.g., [who?]
  4. APA style
    1. Theory and research material is well cited.
    2. Reference list is in good, basic APA style format, however no wiki formatting (e.g., for italics) has been applied.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:51, 26 November 2011 (UTC)


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via login to the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this presentation provides a basic, but well-executed summary overview of the chapter content using narrated text/image slides.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. The general introduction could establish self-help focus questions for the chapter.
  2. The content is relatively detailed and considers in a balanced way the theory and research about the cons and pros of violent video games

Communication[edit source]

  1. Audio is fairly well-paced, although perhaps is a little on the fast side

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Slides are easy to read, with keywords highlighted in a separate colour.
  2. Audio is loud (good), with some minor distortion (perhaps the microphone was slightly too close).
  3. Effective use of Wiki Commons images and Creative Commons Attribution for the presenation

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:10, 10 December 2011 (UTC)