Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2011/Sleep and negative emotions

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Comments[edit source]

Hey :-) Thanks so much for fixing up my quiz numbers, it is really appreciated! Your outline is looking really informative. I was wondering if you are going to cover some of the effects of lack of sleep in terms of obesity? My understanding is there is a strong link between lack of sleep and overeating? Anyway, just a thought - it looks like you have lots to cover there to reach the word limit anyway :-) Thanks again, TabithaJ 05:19, 3 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Hey Kathryn, Your page is coming together really well, I'm looking forward to having another look when it's all done! Take a look at mine for me if you get the time! I also fully agree with the fact women get more nightmares then men, I just thought it was because im a sissy!! ha ha now I can put it down to gender! good luck :) Jemmasanderson 09:07, 5 November 2011 (UTC) Hi :) , I was just wondering if you would be my savour and fix my quiz numbers as well? Jemmasanderson 00:10, 6 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]


Hi Kathryn, thanks for fixing my quiz numbers, it looks so much better.. It seemed a bit confusing the process, but you did it :) goodluck, and ill pop back and see your completed chapter, looking forward to seeing it all done :) Jemmasanderson 04:44, 6 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Really interesting information - well done - Magnolia


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic chapter about the relationship between sleep and negative emotion. A more indepth theory and research review would improve the chapter. In addition, more emphasis on focus questions and a summary of recommended self-help take-home messages based on psychological science.

Theory[edit source]

  1. The theoretical structure/focus could have been improved by sharing a plan and draft and gathering peer-review.
  2. There was a significant emphasis on nightmares. Nightmares are relevant to the relationship between sleep and negative emotions, but probably don't warrant the focus of the second half of the chapter.

Research[edit source]

  1. Limited review and description of research. Surprisingly the article claims that there is little research literature on the topic of sleep and self-regulation. A deeper literature search is recommended before coming to such a conclusion.
  2. (Overly) heavy reliance on Walker & Van der Helm, 2009 in the first half.
  3. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  4. Some statements were unreferenced - see the [factual?] tags

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. Add summary section to clarify the key take-home messages
    2. The chapter could have benefited from a more developed Introduction and Summary, with clear focus questions (Introduction) and a clear take-home self-help message for each focus question (Summary).
    3. Some paragraphs were overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
  2. Learning features
    1. Excellent quiz
    2. How does the quote relate to the chapter take-home message? (explain/make more obvious)
    3. Limited use of images; add more meaningful captions
    4. Add relevant interwiki links
  3. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
    1. Sufficient level, but room for improvement.
    2. Use Australian spelling e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise
    3. The grammar for some sentences could be improved - see the [grammar?] tags
  4. APA style
    1. Numbers under 10 should be written in words e.g. five
    2. Limited range of references
    3. Reference list in reasonable APA style; italics to be added

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:24, 28 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via login to the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, narrated audio with text-based bullet-points presentation.

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. Establish the self-help focus questions in the general introduction.
  2. How much sleep is recommended?
  3. What are the summary/take-home messages besides get more sleep?

Communication[edit source]

  1. The presentation text and audio are simple but effective.
  2. Consider using more images to help illustrate concepts literally or metaphorically
  3. No-serif / non-italicised font is easier to read
  4. Voice-over was enthusiastic (good).
  5. Communication

Production quality[edit source]

  1. Consider using the full five minutes
  2. Audio quality is clear; perhaps it is a little bit echo-ey

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:25, 10 December 2011 (UTC)[reply]