Motivation and emotion/Book/2022/Disappointment
What is disappointment, what causes it, and how can it be managed?
Overview[edit | edit source]
Have you ever received a lower grade than you expected? Have you ever been let down by someone? If so, you may have experienced disappointment. Disappointment is one of the most common and frequently experienced negative emotions (Van Dijk & Zeelenberg, 2002). Emotions are complex, coordinated, multidimensional responses that help us in our everyday lives (Izard, 2010); they motivate us to cope, communicate, and adapt to the world around us (Izard, 2010). Although there is no official definition for the word 'emotion' (see Mulligan & Scherer, 2012), it is agreed that emotions also involve feelings, bodily arousal, purpose, and expression (see Figure 1) (Izard, 2010). This chapter describes disappointment, explores the causes of disappointment, and discusses what can be done to manage disappointment.
What is disappointment?[edit | edit source]
Disappointment is an emotion that occurs when you compare the actual outcome to the perceived better outcome that did not occur, or when your expectations are not met (Zeelenberg et al., 1998a, b). In the context of disappointment, outcomes could be anything, for example, a friend forgetting to do the task you asked them to do, receiving a lower mark on an assignment than you expected, or listening to the new album of your favourite artist and discovering that you don't like any of the songs. Disappointment is all about expectations, and reflecting on what could have happened (Zeleenberg et al., 1998a, b).
Disappointment is a decision-making emotion and has historically been researched using forced choice tasks, where participants are forced to choose between two options, or asking participants to recall moments when they have experienced disappointment (Zeleenberg et al., 1998a; see the regret and disappointment scale for a way to measure disappointment). Researchers generally use choice tasks when researching how disappointment works and various aspects of disappointment, and recall tasks are generally used to define or gain insight on everyday disappointment. One downside to researching disappointment in this way is that disappointment has been shown to increase in forced choice tasks (Matarazzo et al., 2021). However, Matarazzo et al. (2021) found that the thinking, action tendencies, and feelings of disappointment in forced choice tasks are possibly due to the nature of forced choice tasks.
Like envy or empathy, disappointment is a cognitively complex emotion (Ramachandran & Jalal, 2017). Disappointment typically involves feeling powerless, a tendency to remove oneself from the situation, and a desire to do nothing (van Dijk et al., 1999). In some cases, disappointment can look like depression, sadness, embarrassment, or introversion; as the disappointed individual may withdraw from social situations, feel as if they have experienced a loss, try to avoid similar situations, or not want to participate in general. Disappointment can be paralysing, especially experiencing a string of disappointing events back-to-back, however, people are less likely to hold on to their disappointment and are more likely to move on from the experience in a relatively short amount of time (Zeleenberg et al., 1998a, b). See Table 1 for examples of emotions similar to disappointment.
Emotions Similar to Disappointment
|Regret||A cognitively complex negative emotion that occurs when you know that the outcome that occurred could have been better if you made a different choice (Zeelenberg et al., 1998a). "Regret stems from bad decisions" (Zeelenberg et al., 1998a, p.222).|
|Anger||A simple negative emotion that occurs when you cannot achieve your goals and you blame someone or something else for it (Lelieveld et al., 2011). Anger can be the result of disappointment (van Dijk et al.,1999).|
|Disillusionment||A complex negative emotion that occurs when you realise that what you believe or know is false (Maher et al., 2020). Disappointment is a key feature of disillusionment.|
According to Bell (1985), disappointment "is a psychological reaction to an outcome that does not match up with expectations" (p. 1). Bell (1985) believed that perceived disappointment changes the desirability of the outcome and influences how people will act. According to Loomes and Sugden (1986), "when considering any uncertain prospect, an individual forms some prior expectation ... if that consequence falls short of the prior expectation... the individual... experiences some degree of disappointment" (p.271). Loomes and Sugden (1986) have acknowledged that they share the same basic intuition about disappointment as Bell (1985).
Types of disappointment[edit | edit source]
There are two widely recognised types of disappointment. These are outcome-related disappointment [ORD] and person-related disappointment [PRD] (van Dijk & Zeelenberg, 2002). ORD occurs when the expected pleasurable outcome does not occur (van Dijk & Zeelenberg, 2002). This type of disappointment is often researched using forced choice tasks. People who experience ORD may feel hopeless or empty, want a second chance, or try harder to change the outcome next time (van Dijk & Zeelenberg, 2002). PRD occurs when you attribute the undesirable outcome to another person (van Dijk & Zeelenberg, 2002). This type of disappointment is not often focused upon, however, it is probably the most commonly experienced type. People who experience PRD may feel abandoned or distanced from the other person, disapprove of them, and ignore or avoid them (van Dijk & Zeelenberg, 2002). One important consideration is that van Dijk and Zeelenberg (2002) assume that PRD is cause by another person, however, one can be disappointed in themselves. While there has not been research into dimensions of PRD, it would be useful to refine the idea of PRD or research self-disappointment and determine if it should be included in PRD or if it should be considered self-related disappointment.
Test yourself[edit | edit source]
What causes disappointment?[edit | edit source]
Disappointment is caused by thoughts and mental processes that originate in the cerebral cortex. Multiple brain regions have been shown to be active during disappointment or to contribute to the process of disappointment, namely the insula (see Figure 2), and various regions of the prefrontal cortex (see Figure 3) (Chua et al., 2009; Kalat, 2019; Mohr et al., 2010). Due to the complexity of disappointment, some brain regions work together to produce disappointment.
Insula[edit | edit source]
The insula is the brain region responsible for knowing what actions are caused by the self and what actions are not, as well as learning and processing risk and uncertainty (Farrer & Frith, 2002). The anterior insula monitors, evaluates, and consciously represents emotions and feelings that arise from bodily states monitored by the posterior insula, including risk (Craig, 2009). When individuals experience disappointment their anterior insula becomes active (Chua et al., 2009; Mohr et al., 2010); it is also active in the presence of potential loss (Mohr et al., 2010). This could be because individuals can predict that they will feel disappointed if loss was to occur.
Prefrontal cortex[edit | edit source]
The prefrontal cortex [PFC] is a large section of the brain that is involved various processes, including decision making, working memory, emotional reactions, and movement (Kalat, 2019). It has been shown that the anterior regions of the PFC are responsible for decision making, evaluating which course will provide the best outcome, and determining the probability of achieving a good outcome (Kalat, 2019). This is why hemispherical differences, the ventromedial PFC (see Figure 4), orbitofrontal cortex (see Figure 5), and dorsomedial PFC (see Figure 4) are considered to be contributing factors to the experience of disappointment (Chua et al., 2009; Davidson, 2004; Kalat, 2019).
Hemispherical differences[edit | edit source]
The right PFC is sensitive to punishment and controls impulsive behaviour, and the left is associated with coping, resilience, and psychological wellbeing (Davidson, 2004). When an individual experiences damage to their right PFC, cues that would normally signal danger are no longer received and the individual acts impulsively (Davidson, 2004). Therefore, when an individual encounters a risky or potentially disappointing situation, the right PFC activates and sends a "no-go" message to avoid the situation and perceived disappointment.
Ventromedial prefrontal cortex[edit | edit source]
The ventromedial PFC [VMPFC] learns what choices are beneficial and what choices are not, adjusting decision making accordingly (Kalat, 2019). The VMPFC also monitors confidence in one's decisions (Kalat, 2019). As the VMPFC is connected to the insula, it is able to attach emotions to choices and other stimuli that is being considered (Craig, 2009). For example, if you feel confident that you have made the right decision and will achieve a good outcome, you will feel more disappointed than you would have felt if you were less confident that you will achieve a good outcome.
Damage to the VMPFC has been shown to cause impairments in the ability to make considered decisions. Individuals with VMPFC damage tend to make impulsive decisions based on probability, rather than making considered decisions based on reality (Kalat, 2019). This can lead to constant or chronic disappointment as the VMPFC cannot adjust decision making based on previous experience. Below is an example of how the VMPFC works.
You are playing Uno. You have 5 cards to play, and so do your four opponents. You only have number cards, and based off of the cards that have already been played, your opponents must have at least one draw 4 card. You strategically match the number that was last played so that you change the colour of the deck; this makes it more likely that a draw 4 card will be played after your turn, and not used on you. If the draw 4 card is used on you, you will feel more disappointed as your strategy did not work. If the draw 4 card is not used on you, you will feel good about your strategy and continue to use it in the future.
Orbitofrontal cortex[edit | edit source]
The orbitofrontal cortex [OFC] responds to information from the VMPFC. It is the part of the brain that changes and updates expected outcomes of our actions based on current circumstances (Kalat, 2019). The OFC actively differentiates between 'disappointing' (not good) and 'not disappointing' (good) options or outcomes, and chooses the option that is most likely to lead to a 'not disappointing' outcome (O'Doherty, 2004). Damage or inactivity of the OFC is associated with impulsive and otherwise poor decision making, leading to disappointing outcomes (Kalat, 2019). Below is an example of how the OFC decides what to do.
You decide to go to 54 Benjamin for breakfast. When you arrive, you remember that the last time you went there you didn't like the drink you ordered. You also remember that when you were there your friend ordered a drink that you liked the look of, and your friend said it was quite good. This time you order what your friend had last time and you are not disappointed.
Dorsomedial prefrontal cortex[edit | edit source]
The dorsomedial PFC [DMPFC] plays a role in both cognition and emotion (Eickhoff et al., 2016). The DMPFC is responsible for anticipating rewards, monitoring performance, selecting actions, and signalling errors and adverse outcomes (Taren et al., 2011); and is activated when individuals experience disappointment (Chua et al., 2009). The DMPFC regulates responses to unpredictable negative stimuli and regulates reappraisal and distraction (Helion et al., 2019). Once an emotion is identified, the DMPFC shapes the intensity of the emotion based on the individual's goals (Helion, Krueger, & Ochsner, 2019). The more invested or important the outcome is, and the more adverse the opposite outcome is, the more disappointment is experienced. Below is an example of how the DMPFC works.
Your assignment is finally graded and you receive a lower grade than you expected. You feel disappointed in yourself for achieving a lower grade than usual. However, your disappointment starts to disappear when you think about how important the class is to you. You know that it is important to do well, but this particular class is a major, not a core class, so you know that as long as you pass the class you are doing well.
Test yourself[edit | edit source]
How can disappointment be managed?[edit | edit source]
After learning about the mental processes that contribute to disappointment, it may feel as if disappointment is inevitable. After all, if you were to take a minute to think of the last time you felt disappointed, you would probably be able to think of an event that occurred in the last month. Because disappointment is so unpleasant, researchers have found different ways to manage disappointment. The main three strategies to manage disappointment are lowering expectations, living up to expectations, and avoiding risk-taking (van Dijk et al., 2003; Zeleenberg et al., 1998a, 2000). But should disappointment be managed?
Lowering expectations[edit | edit source]
When an unfavourable outcome occurs, so does disappointment. One way to combat disappointment is to lower expectations (van Dijk et al., 2003). In general, people tend to lower their expectations when feedback or the outcome is anticipated in the near future. For example, as a patient gets closer to their surgery, their expectations of a positive outcome could reduce until the patient no longer wants surgery (van Dijk et al., 2003). de Meza and Dawson (2021) have found that people with mistaken expectations or unrealistic expectations (i.e., unrealistic optimism) experience lower levels of well-being. In the long-run, realists (people who have a realistic world view) have significantly higher wellbeing than both pessimists and optimists (de Meza & Dawson, 2021). Overall, lowering expectations leads to a lower chance of experiencing disappointment, however, it is important to keep in mind that this can lower your overall wellbeing if you gain a pessimistic outlook (de Meza & Dawson, 2021; van Dijk et al., 2003).
Living up to expectations[edit | edit source]
Disappointment, like many other emotions, can be anticipated. If disappointment is anticipated, people attempt to avoid it by living up to expectations (Zeleenberg et al., 2000). In this instance, disappointment is a motivator, either to decrease the likelihood of disappointment, or to increase the likelihood of a desired outcome (Zeleenberg et al., 2000). To live up to expectations, the amount of effort that an individual puts in must be able to increase the likelihood of a good outcome. Therefore, this method is only useful when an individual's effort is able to decrease the probability of disappointment and is only appropriate when effort or something controlled by the individual can lead to obtaining the desired outcome (van Dijk et al., 2003). For example, extra study and preparation can result in a better chance at passing a test which would decrease disappointment, but extra time studying a dice will not result in a better chance at predicting which number it will land on.
Avoid risk-taking[edit | edit source]
A more proactive approach to managing disappointment is avoiding it. Choosing safe alternatives that lead to known outcomes do not risk disappointment (Zeleenberg et al., 1998a, b, 2000). This approach could be called risk aversion (Zeleenberg et al., 1998b, 2000). Below is an example of how risk-taking can be avoided, however, disappointment is not always avoidable. This begs the question, should disappointment be managed or avoided?
You are picking ice cream at a new restaurant and you have three options, vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry. You like all three options, however, you find that some chocolate ice creams are disgusting, and you only like specific strawberry ice creams. Vanilla is not your favourite flavour but you find it edible even if you do not completely like it. You pick the vanilla ice cream.
Should disappointment be managed?[edit | edit source]
Disappointment helps us improve our circumstances, improve ourselves, and alerts us to our own expectations and from this we readjust our expectations or adapt to avoid similar disappointing experiences in the future. For example, if someone continually disappoints us we then decide to distance ourselves from that person, or if we are disappointed in the feedback we receive we then work to achieve an acceptable standard, and if we travel with a specific company and their service is disappointing the next time we travel we will most likely try a different company. If disappointment is interpreted as a message that needs to be heard and acted upon, then disappointment occurs less and is perceived as less detrimental (Grainger, 1991).
Questions to consider:
Conclusion[edit | edit source]
Disappointment is a cognitively complex emotion that occurs when your expectations are not met (Zeleenberg et al., 1998a). Whether you experience ORD or PRD, the insula, VMPFC, OFC, and DMPFC work together to choose the most beneficial choice, determine how likely the beneficial option is, and signal when adverse outcomes occur (Craig, 2009; Kalat, 2019; Taren et al., 2011). Sometimes disappointment is unexpected, however, when it is anticipated, techniques such as lowering expectations, living up to expectations, and avoiding risk-taking are effective in reducing disappointment (van Dijk et al., 2003; Zeleenberg et al., 1998a, 2000). Although disappointment is a negative emotion, it helps us to adapt, avoid negative outcomes, and improve ourselves (Grainger, 1991). Overall, successfully managing expectations is a difficult task, but when done well, reduces disappointment.
See also[edit | edit source]
- Anger (Book chapter, 2011)
- Disappointment (Wikipedia)
- Regret (Book chapter, 2016)
- Resentment (Book chapter, 2022)
References[edit | edit source]
Chua, H. F., Gonzalez, R., Taylor, S. F., Welsh, R. C., & Liberzon, I. (2009). Decision-related loss: Regret and disappointment. NeuroImage, 47(4), 2031–2040. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuroimage.2009.06.006
Craig, A. D. (2009). How do you feel - now? The anterior insula and human awareness. Nature Reviews: Neuroscience, 10(1), 59–70. https://doi.org/10.1038/nrn2555
Davidson, R. J. (2004). What does the prefrontal cortex “do” in affect: Perspectives on frontal EEG asymmetry research. Biological Psychology, 67(1), 219–234. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.biopsycho.2004.03.008
de Meza, D., & Dawson, C. (2021). Neither an optimist nor a pessimist be: Mistaken expectations lower well-being. Personality & Social Psychology Bulletin, 47(4), 540–550. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167220934577
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Grainger, R. D. (1991). Dealing with feelings: The disguise of disappointment. The American Journal of Nursing, 91(11), Article 10. https://www.jstor.org/stable/3426784
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Ramachandran, V.S., & Jalal, B. (2017). The evolutionary psychology of envy and jealousy. Frontiers in Psychology, 8, Article 1619. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2017.01619
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[edit | edit source]
- Feeling all the feels: Crash course psychology #25 (YouTube)
- How to deal with disappointment (MensLine.org)
- The value of disappointment (TEDxPCC)
- Why we make bad decisions (TED.com)
- You aren't at the mercy of your emotions -- your brain creates them | Lisa Feldman Barrett (YouTube)