Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Empathy-altruism hypothesis

Comments

The following book chapter has a very specific title and what the book chapter would be discussing. The book chapter has a good structure and headings that are specific. There are lots of references included which is nice to see and good to refer back on. I like how each section already has an outline of questions and main points. Looking forward to seeing the completed book chapter.(The preceding unsigned comment was added by [[User:{{{1}}}|{{{1}}}]] ([[User talk:{{{1}}}|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/{{{1}}}|contribs]]) )

Hi U3201446 , you've picked a pretty good topic and I think that discussing the potential competing motivations to altruism is very interesting. Especially in touching upon Social Exchange theory. This should make your chapter more nuanced, which is always good to ensure engagement. Just a heads up, the recommended wikiversity heading structure uses sentence case. --Robert.E.House (discuss • contribs) 06:33, 29 August 2021 (UTC)

Heading casing

Hi U3201446. FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example: Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development -- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:26, 30 August 2021 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title Excellent User page Excellent - used effectively Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks. Link provided to book chapter Social contribution Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Headings Basic, 1-level heading structure - would benefit from further development, perhaps using a 2-level structure. See earlier comment about Heading casing. Key points Wiki bullet points are currently used for top-level, but not second level points Direct quotes need page numbers Provide in-text wiki links to key related chapters e.g., about empathy and about altruism. Focus the headings and key points more narrowly on the EAH and less about the general concepts of empathy and altruism as separate constructs (there are other chapters with these foci). Overview - Consider adding: a description of the problem focus questions an example or case study The social exchange theory section seems to wander off topic. Concentrate on providing the best possible summary of psychological knowledge (theory and research) about "What is the empathy-altruism hypothesis and how can it be applied?" Expand theory and research. Basic development of key points for each section, with relevant citations. Consider including more examples/case studies. Avoid overcapitalisation (APA style) - more info Write using 3rd person perspective. Conclusion (the most important section): what might the take-home, practical messages be? in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question in the sub-title? Figure Excellent A figure is presented. Caption uses APA style. explains how the image connects to key points being made in the main text. Cite each figure at least once in the main text. References Good For APA referencing style, check and correct: alphabetical order capitalisation Resources Excellent The first external link should probably be a cited reference instead

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:26, 30 August 2021 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. This chapter is well under/over the maximum word count, so half the references and the external links are ignored for marking purposes. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Overview Well developed Overview, with examples. Clear focus question(s). Theory — Breadth The EAH is very well explained, as are related theoretical concepts. Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained. The chapter doesn't wander off into discussion of irrelevant theory. Theory — Depth Appropriate depth is provided about the selected theory(ies). Key citations are well used. Tables, lists, and/or images are used effectively to help clearly convey key theoretical information. Well done on preparing and uploading File:Altruism benefit analysis.png - it is an excellent diagram. The applications to health care, education, and volunteers were excellent. More examples could be useful to illustrate key concepts. Research — Key findings Relevant research is well reviewed. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. Research — Critical thinking Critical thinking is good, but could be further evidenced by considering the strength of relationships. What other research needs to be conducted? When describing important research findings, include more detail about the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) and results (e.g., size of effect or relationship). Integration Discussion of theory and research is well integrated. Conclusion Reasonably good. Add practical, take-home messages. Written expression — Style Overall, the quality of written expression is very good. Written expression "People" is often a better term than "individuals"; similarly "participants" is preferred to "subjects". Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned"). Instead: it is, most often, not needed at all, or use section linking. Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in brackets at the end of the sentence. Layout The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections. Sections which branch into sub-sections should include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections. Grammar Check and correct use of that vs. who. Use serial commas[1] - they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's an explanatory video (1 min). APA style Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). Figures and tables Use APA style for Figure captions. See example. Each Table and Figure is referred to at least once within the main text. Figures are very well captioned. Citations use correct APA style. References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of italicisation. Move non-peer-reviewed sources to the external links section. Written expression — Learning features Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Excellent use of image(s). Table 1 would be better as an editable table.. Excellent use of feature box(es). Excellent use of quiz(zes). Social contribution ~7 logged, substantial, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:29, 31 October 2021 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a reasonably good presentation. The presentation is under the maximum time limit. Overview The opening engages the audience by asking a hypothetical question. A slide with the title and sub-title is presented and narrated - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. The question mark is missing from the sub-title. Briefly explain why this topic is important. Content The presentation addresses the topic. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The presentation is well structured. The presentation makes good use of relevant psychological theory. The presentation makes no use of relevant psychological research. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies. Conclusion A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s). What are the practical take-home message(s) that we can use to help improve our everyday lives based on the best available psychological theory and research about this topic? Audio The audio is easy to follow. The presentation makes good use of narrated audio. Audio communication is clear and well paced. Audio recording quality was very good. Video Overall, visual display quality is good. The presentation makes good use of text and image based slides. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. The visual communication is supplemented by images. The video is well produced using simple tools. Meta-data The chapter sub-title but not the chapter title is used in the name of the presentation - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. The question mark is missing from the sub-title in the name of the presentation. The presentation is incorrectly categorised as being for kids. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding. A link to the book chapter is provided. A link from the book chapter is provided. Licensing Image sources and their copyright status are not provided. Either provide details about the image sources and their copyright licenses in the video description or remove the presentation. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:16, 14 November 2021 (UTC)