Talk:Motivation and emotion/Textbook/Motivation/Unconscious motivation

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Youtube link[edit source]

ANYONE KNOW HOW TO ADD A LINK TO YOUTUBE ?????????

  • To start with, just add the full website address to the video - an auto-link will be created

- I tried that and it didn't work I checked and rechecked my web address but I can't get it to create an auto link?

What's the video? e.g., here's a link to a youtube video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXElh_VM0Uc which can be made prettier like this Dog parkour. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:37, 31 October 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for your help and thankyou for puting all my headings in a file box I couldn't figure it out. So a big thankyou for that

Feedback[edit source]

Here's some comments and suggestions on the draft so far. The main issue is to remove any plagiarised content or quote and attribute it. Then I would expand the section on contemporary psychodynamic perspectives and make sure that you've incorporated peer-reviewed theory and research references about this topic. Hope this helps. Some more specific suggestions follow:

  1. Have you consulted the various Motivation and Emotion textbooks in short loan to check what they cover about unconscious motivation?
  2. Images could be slightly larger.
  3. I've some examples of how to do links to relevant Wikipedia articles in the initial sections - you may wish to do something similar for other key words. (Improves overall quality of written expression for this format)
  4. APA style
    1. It is highly unlikely that you have directly consulted, for example, David Hartley (1749), therefore it shouldn't be a primary citation - it may be a secondary citation.
  5. Proofeading
    1. e.g., freud -> Freud
  6. Introduction
    1. The Introduction could perhaps be improved by identifying some focus questions which are pursued throughout the body and answered in the summary/conclusion. This helps to give a chapter some clear direction.
    2. The Introduction should also outline what will be covered in the chapter and why.
    3. The Introduction could benefit perhaps from briefly mentioning motivation more generally and then the idea of unconscious motivation.
  7. What is tachistoscopic (explain)?
  8. History
    1. Good idea to have this section
    2. Initial half -> make it more prosaic
    3. Last paragraph -> Good, well done.
  9. Sigmund Freud's Theories of The Unconscious
    1. This section seems to be much better written than the previous content. This is sometimes a sign of plagiarism. A web search lead to me [1] which has a very close match with the text you've presented here as your own work. Such text should either be in quotation marks with the source and page number attributed or it should be removed ASAP. The ideas you want to discuss should be independently written in your own words.
  10. References
    1. Check the Freud references - the dates given are probably for the most recent publications, but they are just reprints - APA style would be something like (1937/2010) where 1937 is the original date of publication.
  11. The Freudian content (once you've rewritten it) is worthwhile, but I'm a bit concerned that you should at least equally be emphasising contemporary psychodynamic understandings about unconcious motivation (e.g. as per Ch14 in Reeve (2009)). So, set a historical context, explain Freudian or psychoanalytic understandings about motivation and then describe the subsequent developments and current state of play in psychodynamic understandings (theory and research) about unconscious motivation. - Basically, expand the section "The Unconscious: Other Theories not Related to Freud" (but perhaps give a different title e.g., Contemporary Psychodynamic Perspectives)
  12. Rather than your own theory, I'd suggest that it could be stronger to provide your own critical summary of traditional and contemporary psychological theory and research about unconscious motivation. This would be likely to provide a stronger demonstration of your depth of understanding. Having said this, the lack of discussion of Jung in Reeve (2009) is notable and it could well be relevant to include a section on Jungian unconsciousness and motivation.
  13. Differences Between Conscious And Unconscious Motivations - this could be useful to move up into or near the introduction - i.e., introduce motivations and then distinguish between conscious and unconscious motivations
  14. Summary/Conclusion - provide a review section to remind the reader about the key points that have been covered.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:47, 4 November 2010 (UTC)

Chapter feedback

This textbook chapter has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via login to the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to see what editing changes I have made whilst reading through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below or continuing to improve the chapter if you wish. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

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Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, considerable effort is evident here to tackle a difficult topic. There is sufficient focus on relevant theory and research to constitute a Pass-level chapter, although the chapter is significantly let down by the poor quality of written expression.

Theory[edit source]

Research[edit source]

Written expression[edit source]

  1. The quality of written expression was Pass-level. The chapter seemed to peter out, without a conclusion, so seemed unfinished. I redrafted the introduction as an example of a tighter, focused paragraph. Grammar (especially punctuation), spelling and proofreading were not at Pass-level. I strongly recommend seeking extra training in this area because, overall this was the weakest aspect of the chapter.
  2. Some useful inter-wiki links were provided in "See also". Even more effective would to be make these in-text links embedded in the body of the chapter e.g., motivation.
  3. The chapter could have benefited from a more developed introduction, with clear focus questions.
  4. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
  5. APA style
    1. Images were not captioned using APA style.
    2. Do not cite the year for subsequent citations within a paragraph e.g., Smith (2010) but after that in the same paragraph only refer to Smith.
    3. The reference list was fairly short and was not in APA style.
  6. Some parts of this chapter could have been plagiarised e.g., "Freud considered that even during sleep, our egos protected us from the material in our unconscious minds by presenting our repressed desires in the forms of symbols." As mentioned earlier, given the written expression issues with your normal writing, where sections are particularly well-worded this is a sign of possible plagiarism.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

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Overall[edit source]

7

Structure and content[edit source]

  1. You have a very clear speaking voice.
  2. This is a particularly well paced presentation.
  3. I felt like you really helped the learner through the material
  4. Excellent use of pauses between slides
  5. The slides were clear, but the font could have been larger
  6. What is your critique of Id, Ego and Superego? (justify why you don't believe) - separate slide about this? (if its important). What's a better model?
  7. Jung is pronounced Yung
  8. I felt like something else was needed after Jung - e.g., research on unconscious motivation? Applications? Examples?
  9. Why wasn't the chapter finished? (Didn't you make the recording after writing the chapter?) (confusing)

Communication[edit source]

6

Production quality[edit source]

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:50, 13 December 2010 (UTC)