This textbook chapter has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via login to the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to see what editing changes I have made whilst reading through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below or continuing to improve the chapter if you wish. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.
This is a remarkable chapter in many respects, particularly its scope, depth of reading, use of personal voice and the cohesive argument. For other topics use of personal experience may have been inappropriate, but it really suited the topic and complemented the content knowledge. Possibly, an essay format may have better suited this content. Nevertheless, the chapter succeeds in providing an engaging introduction to psychological approaches to understanding spiritual motivation. It might have been helpful to set out some specific questions to be addressed (I was never really sure where the chapter was heading, although it flowed logically). Personally, I thoroughly enjoyed the chapter; it both reinforced knowledge I had and introduced me to work, authors and experiences I was less familiar with. The chapter seemed to end, though, somewhat suddenly and this may be reflective of not necessarily setting out to address clearly articulated purposes. Overall, the theoretical coverage was very impressive, with critical thinking clearly evident. The research review provided much valuable account of direct experiences, tied to theory and an unfolding argument. However, I think it would have been helpful to have more closely investigated and reported at least some account of recent relevant peer-reviewed academic research into spiritual motivation. Overall, the chapter was well structured and crafted. Perhaps there was perhaps an over-reliance on describing the work of single individuals, although there was a clear thread between them. Again, this may have been some focus questions could have helped. Personal experience was reported generally quite carefully, as phenomenology, and it worked well given the topic.
The critique of empiricism is well made - but there was also room potentially for greater consideration of what has been found about spiritual motivation through contemporary scientific research.
The chapter was generally well-written, with clear sections and paragraph structure. There was some tendency to over-focus on individual authors rather than the underlying idea.
A number of minor written expression corrections or improvements were noted; check the page history to see details of my copyediting.
Wiki links (e.g., Carl Jung) could have been a helpful adjunct for an electronic textbook chapter, especially for the various authors mentioned.
Spelling, grammar and proofreading
The chapter was very well polished and written, with generally only minor issues noted (see history)
In some places a semi-colon was used instead of a comma
APA style:
Subsequent citations within a paragraph don't use year e.g., (Koltko-Rivera, 2006) but then (Koltko-Rivera).
APA style wiki formatting wasn't applied to references.
The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.
This was something different to a standard powerpoint scroll of bullet-points and worked very well as a presentation style.
What is the Home movie about? (And why it is pertinent to this topic?)
I liked the 'cleanness'/simplicity of the slides - but sometimes some text (e.g., name of person) could have helped.
You have a lovely speaking voice - very easy and pleasing to listen to. It was particularly well paced (most people spoke too fast). Reminded me of Alan Watts.
Content-wise this verged on a rant (albeit an interesting, challenging, engaging one) as opposed to being a summary or introduction to spiritual motivation. What is spiritual motivation? What are the key theories and research about spiritual motivation? I was never really sure where it was going or what it's purpose was. There was a narrative, but it was more like a personal talk than an educational accompaniment to the chapter.
