This textbook chapter has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via login to the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to see what editing changes I have made whilst reading through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below or continuing to improve the chapter if you wish. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.
Overall, this is a very strong chapter, congratulations. The chapter provides an indepth, disciplined examination of motivational aspects of dieting, with critical thinking evident and examination of relevant research. The chapter is well supported by an engaging introduction and an effective conclusion. Relevant images and wiki-links are provided.
Some paragraphs were overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
The chapter could have benefited from the development of clear focus questions. Getting comments on a chapter plan and/or chapter draft could have helped with this aspect.
APA style
In-text citations should be in alphabetical order - e.g. check (Fairburn, Marcus & Wilson, 1993; Chernyak & Lowe, 2010)
Do not cite the year for subsequent citations within a paragraph e.g., Smith (2010) but after that in the same paragraph only refer to Smith.
Latest comment: 14 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.
This is a really nicely put together presentation which used voice narration with bullet-point text, very well created and selected images and a focus on the application of motivational theory to dieting.
Establish why this topic is important at the very beginning.
A clear structure was evident (which followed the chapter).
I liked that you spoke using 3rd person - which made it an effective accompaniment for the chapter for the broadest audience.
Nice balance between text and images.
Did you create some of those images yourself? (if so, very well done!!)
Font size - no smaller, a bit bigger would be good.
Voice was easy to listen to, with clear pronunciation. A bit more pause between sentences would allow the information to sink in better.
