Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2016/Sexual motivation and narcissism

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Heading casing[edit source]

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:56, 27 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall[edit source]

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient chapter.
  2. The chapter is well under the maximum word count.
  3. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.
  4. Feel free to make ongoing changes to the chapter if you wish to address any of these comments or make other improvements.

Theory[edit source]

  1. The chapter is reasonably strong with regard to theoretical consideration of narcissism, although it struggles to address the relationship between narcissism and sexual motivation (focusing more, say, on NPD, attachment styles, and relationships).
  2. The chapter tend to focus on NPD as a type of disorder rather than on narcissism as a personality trait.
  3. The Conclusion offers a good summary but could be improved by providing some more concrete, take-home messages.

Research[edit source]

  1. Was the Freud (1914) source directly consulted? If not, don't cite it (or use a secondary citation).
  2. Some statements are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
  3. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the method.
  4. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression[edit source]

  1. Written expression
    1. For academic writing in psychology, such as this book chapter, write in third person rather than first (e.g., avoid "I', "we", "our") or second (e.g., "you", "your" etc.) person perspective.
    2. The chapter somewhat addresses the topic and book theme but lacks practical take-home messages.
    3. Some clarification templates have been added to the page.
    4. Obtaining (earlier) comments on a chapter plan and/or chapter draft could have helped to improve the chapter.
  2. Structure and headings
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing
  3. Layout
    1. No images or tables were used.
  4. Integration with other chapters
    1. No integration with other chapters is evident.
  5. Learning features
    1. Add Interwiki links (to relevant Wikipedia articles) to make the text more interactive.
    2. Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement.
  6. Spelling
    1. Spelling could be improved - see the [spelling?] tags.
  7. Grammar and proofreading
    1. Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals').
    2. Check and correct consistency of capitalisation.
  8. APA style
    1. Check and correct the APA style formatting of in-text citations.
    2. Check and correct the use of "&" vs. "and" (Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets).
    3. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:56, 27 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]