Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2025/Cultural differences in achievement motivation

Draft Feedback

Great work, I thought the chapter was interesting and engaging! I have included a few comments throughout but recommend you review the chapter for spelling/grammar and check the order of the numbering for the figures/table and the related references that have been used. I have also included a few comments where you may want to review some long sentences and consider breaking them up.

In the overview section, you may want to consider outlining what the chapter will focus on to set the reader up to understand what will be discussed. You may also want to consider including an opening sentence to introduce the reader to the topic before you jump into the research. You may also want to consider this approach for other sections in the chapter to provide the reader an introduction to the topic/sub-point.

In the Collectivist cultures section, you may want to reference the table somewhere in the body of the section. I thought your selection of pictures was helpful, but you may want to consider the size of some of them. For example, figure 3 is quite small and the text in the coloured boxes isn’t readable. Thanks for the interesting read, and I hope this feedback is helpful! --U3037334 (discuss • contribs) 07:24, 28 September 2025 (UTC)

Suggestion to testing knowledge and cultural explorations

Such an interesting topic! Can't wait to see how it develops throughout the unit. I'll be kepeing my eye on this one. I have a suggestion for your 'test your knowledge' quiz, it could be cool to include trvial facts about culturals regarding the collectivism/individualism concept of your topic. Also possibly include some sections that talks about the different cultures(maybe geographical based) in collectivisim and indivdulisim e.g. how Latino culture is considered to be collectivism because of these traits display... It could lead to discussing the different kinds of achievement motivations shown in within different cultures and lcoations, or may even show some similarities between cultures. U3258176 (Darlene)--U3258176 (discuss • contribs) 17:45, 21 August 2025 (UTC)

Suggestion

This is a well-structured and informative chapter on cultural differences in achievement motivation. To further enhance clarity, you might consider briefly explaining key terms such as hierarchical and egalitarian systems and including practical examples, like students etc Maryam.sakieh (discuss • contribs) 09:50, 14 August 2025 (UTC)

Hi, I loved reading your chapter, and I wanted to share my thoughts on how you could write your introduction:

Achievement goals and motivational strategies are not shaped in isolation but are deeply influenced by cultural values and the way individuals define themself concerning others. The society a person is part of plays a central role in shaping perceptions of success and the means through which goals are pursued (Korpershoek et al., 2021). In particular, individualistic and collectivistic values provide two contrasting frameworks for understanding achievement. Cultural elements, as illustrated in (Figure 2), highlight the distinctions between these orientations, while broader cultural dimensions (Figure 1) further demonstrate how values dictate not only performance standards but also the strategies individuals adopt in approaching goals.

Good luck continuing your chapter! Hcoad (discuss • contribs) 10:18, 17 August 2025 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example: Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development -- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:31, 18 August 2025 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Also check the page history for changes made whilst reviewing the plan. If you don't understand the feedback or would like further information, get in touch to discuss. Marks are available via UCLearn. Marks are based on the latest version before the due date.

1. Title The title and/or sub-title were not correctly worded and/or formatted (fixed) 2. Headings See earlier comment about heading casing Clear 2-level heading structure Develop closer alignment between sub-title, focus questions, and top-level headings Remove sub-heading from Overview "Introduction" heading isn't necessary – provide this information in Overview or move into subsequent sections Use default heading formatting (i.e., avoid additional formatting such as bold, italics, underline, changing the size etc.) Avoid having sections with only 1 sub-heading – use 0 or 2+ sub-headings 3. Overview Good A basic scenario Ideally, the scenario would be more "real-life" and visceral; currently it is theoretical Basic description of the problem/topic Hone the focus closer to the title/sub-title Reasonably good alignment between focus questions and heading structure, but consider closer alignment Closer alignment between the sub-title, focus questions, and top-level headings is recommended Open-ended focus questions are usually better than closed-ended (e.g., yes/no) questions The first question isn't needed - it isn't required to address the sub-title question 4. Key points Promising development of key points for most sections Excellent use of citations Reasonably good coverage of theory; strive to balance the theoretical content with critical review of relevant research For sections with sub-sections, provide key points for an overview paragraph prior to branching into the sub-headings Avoid providing too much background information. Aim to briefly summarise general concepts and provide internal links to relevant book chapters and/or Wikipedia pages for further information. Focus most of the chapter on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. Conclusion (the most important section) hasn't been developed What might the take-home, practical messages be? (What are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title and/or focus questions?) 5. Figure Figure(s) presented, captioned, and cited The figure caption(s) could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text Use APA style for figure captions Figure(s) are cited at least once in the main text Consider increasing image size(s) (especially if they have text) to make them easier to view 6. Learning feature One use of in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to relevant book chapters Also embed links to related Wikiversity book chapters Consider use of more scenarios/examples/case studies Promising use of quiz question Also consider using tables to summarise key information Consider including more examples/case studies, quiz question(s), table(s) etc. 7. References Very good Well done on identifying at least one relevant systematic review and/or meta-analysis has been identified Move Wikipedia links to the "See also" section Move non-academic / non-peer reviewed sources to the "External links" section All references need in-text citation All citations need to be in the References Only include references which have been accessed and read Check and correct APA referencing style: capitalisation Don't cite AI-generated content because it is unreliable and not peer-reviewed. Instead, follow the using genAI guidelines which include acknowledging and linking to genAI use in edit summaries, otherwise it is a violation of academic integrity. 8. Resources See also Excellent External links Very good Target an international audience; Australians only represent 0.33% of the world population 9. User page Excellent – used effectively Very good Good Basic Not created – see Tutorial 02 Description about self provided Link(s) provided to professional profile(s) A link to the book chapter is provided 10. Social contribution At least three different types of contributions with direct link(s) to evidence [This edit https://en.wikiversity.org/w/index.php?title=Motivation_and_emotion%2FBook%2F2024%2FCultural_variations_in_power_motivation&diff=2726516&oldid=2677378] is incorrect e.g., see https://www.merriam-webster.com/grammar/affect-vs-effect-usage-difference

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:31, 18 August 2025 (UTC)

Suggestion

The chapter is extremely interesting, and I have briefly discussed it in my own chapter! I would suggest adding a subsection discussing how digital and social media environments amplify or moderate cultural differences in achievement motivation. This addition would help integrate achievement motivation with digital/online motivational contexts (which is increasingly relevant)!

- Tenayagerhard U3253170 Tenayagerhard (discuss • contribs) 02:41, 28 September 2025 (UTC)

Book chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall This is an insufficient chapter The main area(s) for potential improvement: better selection and focus on the most relevant theory about the topic more detailed review of the best psychological research about the topic quality of written expression Reasonably good use of academic, peer-reviewed citations to support claims Under the maximum word count, so there is room to expand For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits Overview Good Reasonably engaging scenario or case study in a feature box with a relevant image Explains the psychological problem or phenomenon reasonably well Clarity of written expression can be improved The focus questions are reasonably good There is no mention of individualistic versus collective cultures in the focus questions Theory Insufficient use of relevant psychological theory about this topic Perhaps consider using Hofstede's cultural dimension model Builds effectively on other chapters and/or Wikipedia articles Insufficient depth is provided about the most relevant theory(ies). For example, there is no explanation of the individualistic versus collective culture distinction until the end of the chapter. Basic use of tables, figures, and/or lists to clearly convey key theoretical information Some citations are overused Basic use of examples to illustrate theoretical concepts Research Insufficient review of relevant research Greater emphasis on systematic reviews and/or meta-analyses would be ideal More detail about key studies would be ideal Insufficient critical thinking about relevant research is evident Critical thinking about research could be further evidenced by: describing the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) in important studies considering the strength of relationships acknowledging limitations pointing out critiques/counterarguments suggesting specific directions for future research Integration Insufficient integration between theory and research The chapter places more emphasis on theory than on research; strive for an integrated balance Conclusion Insufficient as a cohesive summary of the best psychological theory and research about the topic Key points are summarised in a basic way Address the focus questions Add practical, take-home message(s) Style Written expression The quality of written expression is well below professional standard. UC Study Skills assistance is recommended to help improve writing skills. Layout The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections The headings could be more clearly aligned with the focus questions Include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections (see tags) Grammar and spelling are poor The grammar for many sentences could be improved (e.g., see tags); consider using a grammar checking tool, Studiosity, and/or peer feedback Possessive apostrophes are not used correctly (e.g., cats vs cat's vs cats') Some words are misspelt (e.g., see the tags). Spell-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages. Proofreading More proofreading is needed (e.g., fix punctuation and typographical errors) to bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard APA style Use serial commas[1][2] Figures Briefly captioned; provide more detail to help connect the figure to the text Each Figure is referred to at least once within the main text using APA style Increase some image sizes to make them easier to read Citations use basic APA Style (7th ed.): Use ampersand (&) inside parentheses and "and" outside parentheses List multiple citations in alphabetical order by first author surname (e.g., Giraffe, 2024; Zebra & Aardvark, 2020) References use very good APA style: A limited range of references are used; consider doing a more thorough literature search Check and correct use of capitalisation[3] Learning features Overall, the learning features are good Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles Add embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Reasonably good use of figure(s) Poor use of table(s). I've removed the table as it was based on the template example rather than summarising key points. Basic use of feature box(es) Reasonably good use of quiz(zes) and/or reflection question(s) The quiz questions could be more effective as learning prompts by being embedded as single questions within each corresponding section rather than as a set of questions at the end Reasonably good use of the "See also" section Add more links Basic use of the "External links" section Target an international audience Add more links. Link to the top 3-6 external resources about this topic. Social contribution ~3 logged, useful contributions with direct links to evidence 1st edit was an error

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:18, 7 October 2025 (UTC)

Individualistic cultures

Hi, I have made two different grammar fixes; other than that, I couldn't find any issues, no spelling mistakes and or grammatical errors. That section was very interesting to read. Great job. Dsanad (discuss • contribs) 10:51, 15 November 2025 (UTC)

Feedback on revision

These changes were reviewed:

1. Major improvements to the quality of written expression
2. Expanded theory
3. Better review of research
4. 3 additional minor social contributions

-- Jtneill - Talk - c